Yesterday I came across this article about the best jobs in Africa, it got me wondering what the best jobs in the OKC area are. So I did a lot of research and a few scientific studies and came up with the seven best jobs in Oklahoma City. After the jump, I hope you enjoy TheLostOgle.com’s guide to the best jobs in the metro area.
1. Mayor
Not surprisingly, Mayor comes in at the top. You get paid good money to be the ruler of the city. All the men wish they could be you and all the women worship you. Also, I think you are commander-in-chief of the Oklahoma City military and can just go and invade whatever cities you want. If I ever get elected Mayor of Oklahoma City, Watonga is going down.
DOWNSIDE: Having to sit through all those city council meetings. Bo-ring!
2. Editor, DeanBlevins.com
Unfortunately I coulnd’t find any records of how much this position pays, but it doesn’t really matter. The big attraction here is that you don’t really have to do anything, or at least you don’t have to do it well. I was unable to confirm that the current editor of DeanBlevins.com was also in charge of the site re-design at NewsOK.com
DOWNSIDE: Forced to work with Dean Blevins.
3. Make-up Artist, KOCO
The good thing about this job is that you get to work fairly intimately with Maggie Carlo and Jessica Shambach. Strangely, the launch of TheLostOgle.com has not enticed either one of them to throw themselves at me, so I’ve decided to enroll in Beauty School and apply for this job. Please don’t tell my friends because I don’t want to get beaten up.
DOWNSIDE: Forced to apply make-up to Mark Rodgers.
4. Sports Journalist, Any Local Media Outlet
This job is highly sought-after because in this market there is no such thing as an adversarial relationship between the sports press and the people they cover. So basically you just get to rub elbows with local celebrities and give your opinions without much accountability. Unless you are a woman, of course, in which case you will be run out of town by the lowest rated sports station in town. But that’s not all bad, because you will eventually be hired by ESPN (see: Lawrence, Amy).
DOWNSIDE: Likely to be humiliated by Bob Stoops after asking a question he deems silly.
5. Blogger, TheLostOgle.com
Fish in a barrel. Fish in a barrel.
DOWNSIDE: Numerous bridges not burned, but napalmed. Also, telling women that you are a “blogger” is apparently not a turn-on.
6. Road Construction, Multiple Companies
The best job security in the nation. You are assured of having work for the rest of your life.
DOWNSIDE: People continually asking you, exasperatedly, “When is that damn road going to be finished?”
7. Segment Producer, KFOR
I don’t know if you have noticed, but over the last year or so Channel 4 has had Lance West do all sorts of incredibly dangerous things. He’s been dropped in freezing ice, shot with a stun gun, and even forced to watch that 1-800-2SellHomes commercial over and over for 12 straight hours. One of the higher-ups at KFOR clearly wants to kill Lance West off, so this job is absolutely perfect for those of you with a mischievous, creative streak.
DOWNSIDE: Having to listen to Kevin Ogle complain all day that “The Rant” is not as popular as “My 2 Cents.”
I hope you have enjoyed this guide to the best jobs in Oklahoma City and that you take this into account when searching for your next place of employment.
Dangit, you left off introducer of movies no one watches anymore on OETA…
I think the Mayor makes like 22K a year.
Are you saying that 22K is not good money?
I didn’t realize that. The mayor of Tulsa gets over $100,000 a year. Mayor Mick should ask for a raise.
22k good money, are you kidding me?
Yes.
Unless things have changed lately, anchors do their own makeup and hair.
They probably get consultation and free haircuts from their sponsoring salons, but Amy admitted to putting hers on in the car once during a show. That’s why she looks so awful all the time, right?!
I wouldn’t hold my breath if you want Jessica and Maggie to throw themselves at you. Once again, you’ve failed to look at their left hands. Don’t you guys EVER look down there? (Don’t answer that!)
The one job you really missed would be Personal Trainer for Amy McRee. Wouldn’t you like to work with those abs every day? (Maybe you shouldn’t answer that either!)
Hello, none, we’re guys…the left hand (or right hand for that matter) is one of the features we are least interested in.
I’m actually a huge fan of KOCO and Jessica and Maggie. I’m glad you guys are giving them some of the limelight, because until late 2005, the only show in town was the Amy McRee show at 5, 6, and 10pm.
I’d like to see KOCO win the 10pm sweeps sometime. They deserve it. They work their tails off, and it would be very cool to see an end to all the bragging promos that NEWS9 runs all the time. KWTV has not been humbled in a long time, and it’s beginning to really show.
Perhaps TheLostOgle can organize a November KWTV boycott to see just how far your sphere of influence reaches?!
When you site can start affecting the ratings, you will have truly arrived!
I also think KOCO is for the most part very good, and it’s normally my first choice at 10 pm.
But, has anyone noticed that the anchors on channel 5 sit really close together? Like uncomfortably close? I’m always afraid that Tyler Suiters is going to accidentally jerk his elbow and smack Maggie Carlo right across the face.
We can’t organize a boycott of Channel 9. The first rule of TheLostOgle.com is “Don’t Cross Gary England.” The Second rule is “See Rule 1″.
Maybe we can lead a boycott of the Oklahoma News Report on OETA.
You forgot the “Weather Terrorist”. Mike Morgan and Gary England are a bunch of weather extremist, striking the fear of Mother Nature into you and your family for better ratings and free drinks at Chili’s.
That has to be awesome.
Yes, the anchors on Channel 5 sit very close together. I’m glad others have noticed. They do this so they can get a tighter two-shot of the anchors. You can see their faces better and enjoy their smiles more.
Next time you watch NEWS9, look at the immense distance between the anchors and how cold it feels. Combine that with all those new distant shots they use and you’re lucky to be able to see Amy McRee at all, and isn’t that why we men watch in the first place?
“look at the immense distance between the anchors and how cold it feels.” - is this a Coldplay lyric?
“isn’t that why we men watch in the first place?” - I’m calling bs on this one
I got $10 that says none = “Husker Rick” Mitchell