When you are a massive and influential media empire like The Lost Ogle, all sorts of interesting things come across your desk. Last week we received this tidbit. It looks like KOKH Fox 25 is searching for a new chief meteorologist.
Fox 25 in Oklahoma City has an exciting opportunity for a Chief Meteorologist to anchor our primary newscasts and supervise our Weather Department.
We’re searching for an energetic and knowledgeable meteorologist who knows weather and its importance to the Oklahoma City DMA.
When we received this information, Patrick said that he should apply so that he could reveal to us all the inner workings at Fox 25. I said that we should ignore it and just keep playing Halo for the rest of the night. Clark suddenly jumped out of his chair and exclaimed, “This sounds like a job for the Justice League!”
After the beating, we simply decided to help KOKH out and give them some suggestions on who to hire. You can find them, as always, after the jump…
Aaron Tuttle
The former KOCO back-up weatherman recently left Channel 5 to work outside of television. As one of the few members of the media who was seemingly liked by everyone (Clark refers to him as “the beloved Aaron Tuttle,” but that could just be a redhead thing), he would be an obvious choice for KOKH.
Val Castor
After years of serving as Channel 9’s most reliable and biggest name storm chaser, it’s time for Val Castor to step out of Gary England’s shadow. The only question is whether or not Emperor Gary would endorse his right-hand man’s move in front of the camera. Could this be Belichick/Mangini II? All eyes would be on the first post-severe-weather-coverage handshake.
Cardboard Jim Traber
For my money, it would be pretty sweet to have a weather segment that had the usual background visuals going on and just had Cardboard Jim standing off to the side staring down his nose at the audience. They could even put a tape recorder behind him saying things like “Big fella, this storm is going to be massive!” and “If you put a truth serum in this wall cloud it would probably admit that it’s going to turn into a tornado!”
Butch McCain
Many moons ago, the McCain brothers had our favorite morning show in Oklahoma City. Butch was even a weatherman at one point. They’ve long since moved to Hollywood to become actors, but I think it would be a great idea to bring them back to OKC. Still, seeing as how Butch appeared in some movie called “The Sex Monster,” he may not be so kid-friendly anymore. Let’s put him on in the evenings after the kiddos have been put to bed.
Constance Jones
It seems Constance has decided to leave OKC and head for the sunnier skies — if not greener pastures — of Miami. I always thought she was one of the good guys, so maybe KOKH can offer her a job and a big raise to stay here.
Al Eschbach
One of Al Eschbach’s defining characteristics is complaining about how weathermen always get things wrong. Here’s Al’s chance of showing how much better of a job he can do. Frankly, I’m guessing his weather predictions can’t be much worse than those he gives in the sports world.
Jim Inhofe
Somebody told me once that Jim Inhofe has some very strong opinions about weather and climate. I don’t know if this is true or not because I was too busy watching old Ranger Roger tapes to look it up. But I’ve always believed people with vehement opinions must know what they are talking about. So to me Senator Inhofe seems perfectly qualified to be a meteorologist.
You’ve never seen “The Sex Monster”?
Two Words: Lauren Richardson!
If an F-5 was coming to OKC, we all would feel better knowing that Lauren was watching over us (insert joke here).
What happened to the one they had? Did Sally Kerns get him fired for being a mo?
i think this is a perfect opportunity for an up-and-coming weather team to hearken back to the good old days and revive the much-misunderstood tradition of the “Weather Bimbo”. i think Ashlynn Brooke could make a rain-wrapped mesocyclone sound more appealing than terrifying…
I’d like to see Pat Jones get the job just to watch him diagram incoming storms on the blue screen:
“Whatcha got here is a cyoo-myoo-LO–NIM-bus cloud comin’ on strong. It might not turn into an, uh, super-serious storm, and whatnot, but I tell ya I wouldn’t want to fool around and get stuck out there without an umbrella, you-know-what-I-mean?”
Mike Hosty would make sense with a big Fraidy Hole tune at just the right time.
Tall Paul:
“It’s blowing away everything you own
Like cars and trucks and mobile homes
It’s a storm so run son run”
This may come as a shock to some of you, but I am still alive (by most legal standards) and have been tucked away in PBS hell. I would love to get a steady paycheck again instead of having to rely on a never ending telethon.
Where do I apply?
Lauren Would be hot doing weather… I think she could do it too!
I’d go for the $600-in-groceries lady. Unless we don’t need to stay local, in which case I vote for John Waters. Now that we’re a Big League City, and all.
SP has accepted a job in Miami. (Florida not my am ma)
I was molested by Ranger Roger when I was a kid. He came into Alligator Alley when I was 8 and asked if I wanted to see the station……We didn’t go to the station.