Oklahoma City News, Entertainment & Occasional Humor • Established 2007

Ogle Madness Week 1 Recap

The most talked about celebrity tournament in Oklahoma City history kicked off this week. There were winners, there were losers, and there was the OU women’s basketball team.

We’re here to recap the first half of the first round, right after after a word from our sponsors, AM Oklahoma.

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Game of the Week: Tall Paul 159, Al Eschbach 156

The best game of the week was also the week’s biggest upset, with the animated character defeating the member of the OKC media most often mistaken for an animated character by a mere 3 votes.

In the post-game press conference, a defiant Eschbach declared that he would have won the game if he hadn’t been distracted by Artie Gigantino yelling out the names of different wines from the stands.

Biggest Blowout: Ashlynn Brooke 79%, Tyler Nelson 21%

Probably not a surprise, Ashlynn Brooke — backed by the powerful and influential porn industry — disposed of the helpless Nelson with ease. The man once supported by all of Hollywood has recently seen his biggest boosters abandon him, leaving only Brian Pitts — the artistic director of Ballet Oklahoma — in his corner.

Valiant Effort To Pull An Upset: Some guy from Bob Mills Furniture.

In the face of overwhelming odds, the good people of Bob Mills furniture did everything they could to drum up support for Mills’ sweater designer. Some of that work appeared to be somewhat successful, some much less so, but either way we admire the dedication! After another year of hopefully Cosbyesque sweater design, perhaps Bob Mills’ Sweater Designer will get a bit of an easier draw.

The Other Games

The rest of the action rounded out this way:

In the East Regional, Gary England tripled up Myron Patton’s Mustache, while Kevin Ogle had a surprisingly easy time with Wild 104.9 morning talkers Joey and Heather. Berry Tramel had relatively little problem sending Senator Inhofe to the sidelines, while Doug Sauter and his sweet, sweet facial hair had little chance to overcome Playmate Sunni Kate Golloway.

Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked Brady Brus out of the tournament, and Jim Traber — I’m sure satisfyingly — defeated Jenni Carlson while Sam Bradford had no problem with Bryan Abrams.

Over in the Midwest Region, Rick and Brad dominated fellow morning DJ’s Jack and Ron while the Scrotal Assassin edged out a victory over Hinder. Maggie Carlo dispensed with Grace Hanadarko with relative ease, while Tyler Suiters and Mayor Mick defeated Charles Hill and Clark Matthews, respectively. There was one upset in the Midwest Region, with BBJ surprisingly edging out a win over Clay Bennett.

We hope you enjoyed the first round; come back Monday when the South Region kicks off. Your matchups will be as follows:

  • (1) Kelly Ogle vs. (16) 1-800-2SellHomes Lady
  • (8) Dave Morris vs (9) Patrick
  • (4) Toby Rowland vs. (13) Mr. Monday
  • (5)Dean Blevins vs. (12) Brent Skarky
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    Comments

    1. The clock struck midnight for me pretty early. The demographic I was counting on (family) didn’t roll out like I’d hoped, and some (my wife) even switched sides because they had Mayor Mick advancing in their office pool.

    2. The scrotal assassin beat hinder? Good lord man! When the people of your home state back a man that ripped off another mans pride and joy, over you…its time to jump off a bridge. Seriously. Or quit playing terrible music.

      Fun Fact: I used to drink heavily with Joe the guitarist at UCO in my fraternity days.

    3. After dutifully watching the word from your sponsors I couldn’t help but wonder who would win if Butch and Ben’s hair went up against Myron Patton’s moustache.

    4. Have you noticed that Myron shaved his ‘stache? Do you think that was because of the ass-whuppin’ that the almighty laid on him in round one?

    5. Anyone who knows anything about the Ogle brothers knows that ALL and ONLY THREE on on the news. They all have their strengths and weaknesses and they each appreciate each other. Kevin has never been/is not overshadowed by his brother. He has been his role model. Kevin and Kelly are happy for each other’s immense successes.

      Kevin is the oldest… and the tallest. (6’8)
      Kent is the middle brother.
      Kelly is the baby.

      All of the brothers are married and have children.

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