Oklahoma City News, Entertainment & Occasional Humor • Established 2007

Get wasted this Saturday at the Norman Music Festival…

As you surely know by now, the Norman Music Festival is taking place this Saturday somewhere along Main Street in downtown Norman. The concert should be pretty damn cool and you should go! But…if you don’t want to take my word for it, here are some reasons to go:

“¢ You get to drive to Norman on a beautiful Saturday afternoon, get hammered, and then not have to watch OU destroy some terrible opponent. Seriously, when was the last time this happened. Usually when I find myself in downtown Norman on a Saturday afternoon, I’m at the Vista wondering if the waitress is flirting with me to get a bigger tip, or if she genuinely likes me. I’m also wondering why the hell I’m not at Campus Corner.

“¢ See some weird ass bands. The Polyphonic Spree are headlining, The Chainsaw Kittens are reuniting and both Colourmusic and the Evangelicals will be playing. Even this weird band that I’ve never heard of will be there playing some strange instrument that I never knew existed.

“¢ Wear a Lost Ogle T-shirt and get FREE admission!!! Yes, that’s right Ladies and Gentlemen, simple wear one of our “limited edition” Lost Ogle T-Shirts and you don’t have to pay a dime to get in the festival.

“¢ Meet Cardboard Jim Traber. We heard from a good source that the Ultimate Cardboard Sports Mind will be on hand to take pictures with and interview the bands. This same source said he may even sign some autographs for a few lucky fans.

“¢ Easily sneak in alcohol. This is actually more of a wish than a reason, but hopefully you can easily sneak alcohol into the festival. If not, bring your wallet.

Anyway, I hope the reasons above are good enough to convince you to go to the festival. If not, remember that if this one is a B.F.D, then next year’s festival will be bigger and better and maybe even weirder. If that doesn’t convince you, then you’re about as cool as Clark Matthews’ internet checkers tournament.

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Comments

  1. i think you forgot a bullet point: i will be there. wearing a bee-spot t-shirt. actually, i will be there because my dad helped organize because he’s way cooler than me.

  2. Wow stevo, how effective to boycott a FREE event. Do you avert your eyes from the Daily Oklahoman at the 7-11 to sock it to them?

  3. The Dark Lords are amused that TLO is excited about an event sponsored by the Dark Tower. Our plans to lure communist hippies in Oklahoma under the guise of a free music festival (possible by wimgo sponsorship) has already proven to be successful.

    Yes, come to the festival and fill your minds with the soothing music of bands most people outside of Norman have not heard of and bask yourselves in the subliminal tones of your inevitable demise.

    As always, we are always watching.

    Your friendly folks at the Dark Tower.

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