A couple of weeks ago, it was announced that the Norman Music Festival will be making its return to the streets of Downtown Norman. This year’s festival will take place on Saturday, April 25th and will feature the popular indie group (and Outback aficionados) Of Montreal as its headliner…or possibly co-headliner. From the NormanMusicFestival.com:
As many of you may have been following in the Entertainment World, Joaquin Phoenix announced a few months ago that he was leaving acting to pursue a new career in music. Since then, Joaquin’s had a few impromptu appearances to negative reviews, and a few interviews that were met with bad press. Well, the Norman Music Festival does not like this one bit!
With that in mind, NMF would like to offer one of this generation’s greatest talents his first professional gig. We are using this web release to extend an open offer to Joaquin for an April 25th performance on the Main Stage at the second annual Norman Music Festival. It’s our small effort to provide a platform for Joaquin’s new career, and we hope it somehow helps.
Yeah…this is a pretty brilliant move by the Norman Music Festival. It’s brilliant because regardless of what Joaquin does, it’s going to get them good, free publicity. Hell, it’s almost as brilliant as giving media passes to three guys from an obscure social blog, letting them chug beers in an alley, and then sending them out into the streets with a camera and cardboard cutout of Jim Traber.
Anyway, here’s some hope that Joaquin will take the bait and make it down to Norman. But if he doesn’t, we decided to go ahead list some other individuals or bands that will be some get some good publicity—and maybe even boost attendance—for this awesome festival. Check it out after the jumpity jump…
Sally Kern and the Homophobes
Of Montreal is already headlining the festival, and you really can’t get much gheyer than them. To help provide equal time, maybe we should let Sally Kern, some her legislative colleagues and few members of her church congregation form a band to sing Baptist hymns…on the second stage.
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Death Cab for Skarky
Various sources have confirmed to us the Brent Skarky formed this band a couple of weeks ago just to impress girls at the Electro Lounge. Maybe this will give Brent the big break he needs to make it big.
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Falcon Five-O Hotel
Not to be outdone by Brent Skarky, we have heard that Dave Morris’ band Falcon Five-O has added the word “Hotel” to the end of their name to give them a critically acclaimed, indie-edge. They are also writing songs about Anne Frank and carrot flowers.
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Anyone who waits tables at Galileo…
This could probably be expanded to anybody who works within a six block radius of the Paseo. Seriously, if you go anywhere in that area your waiter usually writes their band’s MySpace page on your tab and pitches their “debut” EP when you choose an appetizer.
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Lloyd Fields & the Rascals
Whatever happened to this story? About a year ago, it was reported that Labor Commissioner Lloyd Fields attempted to steal a guitar at a rodeo after party. Since then, we haven’t heard anything. Maybe Mike McCarville or the OPNS will give us an update?
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Stevie Rós
According to our sources in area hookah bars, Stevie Rós is the band Steve Hunt formed as tribute to Sigur Rós, the gay Icelandic instrumental super group who sing songs in a made-up language. Hard to believe, huh?
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Aubrey and the Insanely Rich So and So’s
I’m not sure if Aubrey McClendon plays an instrument or even knows how to sing, but he could probably use the appearance fee to buy more Chesapeake stock and/or wine.
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Hinder
Although it would torture us to have listen to their music, as least a bunch of hot slutty girls would show up and flash everyone. Hippie girls don’t do that. Plus, after the show, maybe the hippie crowd will kidnap Hinder front man Austin Winkler and bury him inside the walls of the Opolis. Hell, that would be pretty damn cool. Not only would it be the end of Hinder, but we’d see boobs. Awesome!
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Color Me Badd
As long as Bryan Abrams doesn’t get drunk and attack us, this would probably be the next best thing to getting Joaquin. I’m not sure if that’s a good or bad thing.
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Hanson featuring The Irritated Tulsan
Actually, this would never happen. T.I.T. (that’s what we like to call The Irritated Tulsan) said he is boycotting all concerts held in the Oklahoma City area as a protest to what people said about his D-Fest post.
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The Arcade Fire
Actually, this is one is totally serious. I was lucky enough to see the Arcade Fire play at the Conservatory before anyone knew who they were, and they are one of the best live bands I’ve ever seen. If the Norman Music Festival could land a band like that I’d be forced to shutdown this site for a couple days just to clean up the mess.
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Power Lines Down
This is the band created by Clark Matthews that only plays Marteeka and Wakeland cover songs. Yes, it’s an odd combination, but it works. It’s the genius of Clark Matthews at work.
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I just want to congratulate you on the best comedic Neutral Milk Hotel reference I’ve read so far today.
It is 8 am.
As a Normanite, i will offer Joaquin a free place to crash. The only condition is he will have to watch Parenthood with me. I won’t make him reenact the brown paper sack parts, though. that would be creepy.
I think you just made Jeff Mangum proud, but he doesn’t read. I also read in an interview that Joaquin said he learned everything he knows about being an MC from his brother River, whom he said is “really, really in to underground hip-hop”. That seemed in bad taste to me.
I thought that Joaquin was really pretty good on Letterman. Letterman hasn’t been funny in more than 15 years and kept his streak alive that night. Joaquin sang his own stuff in “Walk the Line” so why can’t he have a singing career? Give him a listen how bad can it be? Worse than this crap they play on the radio now?
Huh. Apparently, Joaquin’s publicist is an old man who complains about the radio, a comedy aficionado and reads The Lost Ogle.
Also, he will cut you, so watch out!
When Snoop Dogg does a spot on impersonation of Johnny Cash, I’ll believe that Joaquin Phoenix is capable of busting a rhyme.
i wish color me badd was playing. i’d love to share a bag of beer with bryan abrams then through no consequence of my own unknowingly piss him off and have him insult me by using racial slurs. i mean doesn’t that sound like the ideal saturday afternoon?
I hope they get Phoenix. I can’t imagine him Joaquin away from an opportunity like this. (zing!)
But, seriously, how great would this be? You just know it would appear in the “documentary” that Casey Affleck is making about him. It would be a legendary moment in NMF history.
By the way, you Ogle Boys need to do your homework. The “waitress” in the Galileo’s pic is none other than Samantha Crain, who would probably be playing at the Norman Music Festival if she weren’t busy kicking some cross-country ass on the indie circuit right now.
Yep. Sam Crain rules.
And so does the prospect of Joaquin appearing at NMF2.
it’s like my birthday and christmas all rolled into one! thanks for the pic of falconcrest five – oh hotel foxtrot. you better believe i left work early today to get that shit blown up poster size.