Archive for August, 2009

Randy Brogdon should not be the Governor of Oklahoma…

Monday, August 31st, 2009

Last week, the Brogdon for Governor campaign sent a mass “video email” to local supporters, press and detractors.  The video was essentially a flash website that featured a little Randy Brogdon telling us that he’ll do whatever it takes to protect the rights, liberties and freedoms of his fellow right-wing evangelical Christians.  He also shared with us his affinity for ADT security.

What?

Take a look at this video that someone took of the Randy Brogdon website just after it was emailed to everyone.  Pay special attention to the five buttons/links at the center of the page:

Yeah.  I know it’s part of the right-wing extremist repertoire to use scare tactics on the campaign trail, but this is taking things too far.  We get it.  Randy Brogdon is going to be tough on crime.  But come on, are we really supposed to believe that having our Governor sell ADT security systems will make our state a safer place to live?  I don’t think so.

Actually, linking to ADT security seems to just be a ridiculously stupid mistake by the Brogdon campaign.  Now when you visit the website, you see a “Contribute” graphic instead of one that reads “Get Your Gift Card.”  “Protect My Home Now” has been replaced with “Biography of Randy.”   Now if only Brogdon can properly space his toll-free 888 number and get the little Randy on the screen to wear a dunce hat, the webpage would be 100% accurate.

Anyway, I’m sure there are plenty of reasons that Randy Brogdon should not be our next Governor, but I would put this gaffe at the top of the list.  Seriously, if you can’t even build a simple website without screwing things up, what business do you have being our Governor for the next four years?  We don’t need a Governor to screw things up.  We have a Legislature for that.

Sunday Inspiration (4)

Sunday, August 30th, 2009

amy mcree

If you have any “funny” (and legal) motivational poster ideas, you can create them here.  When you’re done, send them to The Lost Ogle at gmail dot com and you may see it in a future Sunday Inspiration post.

Saturday Morning 1990’s Music Video (52)

Saturday, August 29th, 2009

Many people accuse of us being sacrilegious and blasphemous because we worship Gary England and consider him a deity, but if that’s the case, why would we post a video of Jesus Jones???

Good question, huh.

Grandma’s got a brand new blog…

Friday, August 28th, 2009

NewsOK.com has a diverse network of blogs.  Some of them are actually an okay read — like this one and this one and this one — while most of the other ones kind of blow— like this one and this one and this one.  But one blog stands above all the others.  And it’s written by a snarky old lady who writes about rich people for a living.  Meet Ms. Peggy Gandy.

Here’s a sample from her most recent post at Keeping it Lite:

I’m sure most of you encounter unexplainable problems  with your computer from time to time. UNLESS  you are a computer Geek.  You know, they are those fellows who drive little bugs around town with the signs on top. I’m not sure they  know all that much but I understand it beats delivering pizzas.

I’m really going out on a limb to write this blog because sometimes a computer’s memory works, and heaven knows I need to stay on the good side of this one.

I’m positive computers are of the male gender – come on – women are much more dependable and you can reason with them. That being said, I need to mention that I have named my computer Marvin.  I have only struck him twice (both times in the side – you know what  new monitors cost). But, wouldn’t you know, the blows upset the printer so much it  coughed out 42 blank pages without stopping. Which brings us to my printer whose name I don’t care to mention. Talk about tempermental. I have unplugged and replugged this machine so many times I’ve about worn out the switch. Copies only roll out in the dead of night when I no longer need them. Come daylight, this little piece of work shuts  down. I would give it a good whack but it would probably upset Marvin so much he would forget my password.

Occasionally Marvin and I have a good day. He starts when he’s supposed to and let’s me log onto my e-mail and send two or three messages. That’s about it. The next thing I know he informs me my system is overloaded, which I know darn well can’t be true. I called the paper’s tech guys once and asked for their help. Big mistake. Unless you can walk the walk and talk the talk with these guys, forget it. They don’t know terms like ”dohickey on the left,” or that “spot just below the red button.” Instead they’ll have you delete everything in your baskets , including some I never heard of, take the trash out from under your desk, empty the dishwasher, and end with “if that doesn’t work, don’t call us, we’ll call you.”

Granted, it’s not super funny, and she does seem to make the bizarre assertion that women are more reasonable than men, but I kind of like this blog.  When I read it, it kind of makes me feel like I’m reading something that my sarcastic grandmother would write.  The only difference is that my grandmother would probably just write irreverent stuff about her dog, my crazy Aunt Leslie’s drinking problem or a date she went on with Bob Barry Sr. in the 1940s (seriously!).

All that being said, isn’t it kind of sad that the best blog at NewsOK is written by an old women who has named her computer Marvin?   I think the only other person at OPUBCO to give a computer a proper name is Steve Lackmeyer.  He calls his PC “Mr. Nichols.”  I’ve also heard that John Rohde calls his computer “Cake,” but that’s just a rumor.

Anyway, this lady needs to quit her job and blog full time.  Maybe she can call it IbabysatKellyOgle.com or something like that.  She could even have a feature where she goes to the senior center and takes pictures of her friends with a cardboard cutout of that obnoxious Andy Rooney.  She really needs to hurry up and get this done.  We need some good competition.

FNITBT August 28-30

Thursday, August 27th, 2009

okc

Here we are, folks. Another Friday. If you’re half as excited as you smell, then this is going to be a good one. So, it’s been sort of a crazy week, huh? Long-time senator Ted Kennedy died. This is my moment of silence for him. __________ Okay, I think that went pretty well. Pretty effing respectful, if you ask me. It was also a week for comebacks. Michael Vick took a few snaps in the NFL, and Whitney Houston released an album. Neither were very impressive, but they both got a few more hot dogs sold, didn’t they? That’s the important thing. I’m not saying I’m not moved a little by their “redemption”, but I don’t really care. They’re both a bit off, and they both seem to only be good at one thing. And that thing is singing beautifully. I think they’ll be married by 2012. What a couple!
This weekend seemed to have no shortage of ridiculousness. There’s a bit of a redneck influence, so we’ll see how low the bar gets set. I didn’t even have to make anything up. Which I’ve never done. Here are some “real” events for you to “attend”. Go?

larry1

Larry the Cable Guy – August 29 – Firelake Grand Casino

Ahhh. Finally — some gotdanged thinkin’ man’s comedy. So here’s the thing: I’m not a fan, but I get it. Say what you will, but if nothing else, Dan Whitney is a brilliant business man. Sure, Larry the Cable Guy is a ridiculous stereotype of a character, but you can’t argue with his numbers. That guy makes ass-tons of money, and doesn’t even have to write his own material. It’s perfect. He just puts on his overalls, tries to ‘member his words, drinks 9 beers and boom — stand up comedy gold! I’ll talk shit about Mr. Whitney after I’ve also been in a Pixar movie. So…yeah, anyway.

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Peace, Love and Thunderstanding: Bye-Bye Kevin Durant

Thursday, August 27th, 2009

YouTube Preview Image 

Well, enjoy Kevin Durant in Oklahoma City while you can, because apparently it will be short lived…at least according to everyone not named Kevin Durant.

Sure, Kevin Durant can say things, like, “I want to stay in Oklahoma as long as possible. I do, that’s the honest truth. I love it there.”  He could actually say nothing but that and journalists in big markets would still write crap like Dan Shanoff (formerly of ESPN.com) did recently on his Twitter account:

Kevin Durant bolting OKC for DC in 2012 is the new LeBron bolting Cleveland for NYC in 2010. Mark it down.

This is not new material, ESPN.com’s The Sports Guy has been referring to the Thunder as “Kevin Durant’s Future Former Team” since they left Seattle.  The morons behind “Save Our Sonics” have been reporting that Kevin Durant and Jeff Green personally sought them out to tell them they would never sign a contract with a team in Oklahoma City.  So, I guess we should be living in fear that our first professional superstar will be abandoning us as soon as he has a chance.  Or…

You could click on the jump and learn why it is idiocy to suggest this happening.

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Silent Blunder

Thursday, August 27th, 2009

Ericand the Coach

Yesterday, The Oklahoman reported that former OU defensive end Eric Thunander was charged with some really terrible crimes that involved really terrible things.  From the Joke:

A former University of Oklahoma football player who wrote an autobiography about dealing with hearing loss and depression faces felony charges of child molestation and pornography.

Eric S. Thunander, 29, of Norman was charged Tuesday in Cleveland County District Court with three counts of lewd acts with a child and one count of possession of child pornography…

According to a court affidavit, a 9-year-old girl told a daycare worker on Aug. 10 that Thunander touched her inappropriately earlier that day. Thunander also is accused of molesting the girl on Aug. 9 and at some point between May and September of 2008.

Norman officers interviewed Thunander with help from a sign language interpreter, the affidavit states, and he confessed verbally and in writing to inappropriately touching the girl on three occasions. He also is accused of having downloaded child pornography onto his computer.

First of all, let me state that Clark Matthews advised that we not write a thing about this topic.*  And let me tell you, I nearly did what he said.  But then I figured that we’ve written about prostitutes, murder suspects, and Byron Houston masturbating on Northwest Expressway.  It guess it just makes sense for us to ridicule a a local person for **allegedly** committing one of the sickest crimes known to humanity.

Another factor that made me think we should write about this is that Eric Thunander has a MySpace Page.  And on his MySpace Page he has a blog. This is probably the best post:

I will be doing motivational speaking during the 6-month period process (from now til January).

I also will be interviewed by Oklahoma City’s Channel 9’s reporter, Gan Matthews, later this week.s

We invite you to look out for it. We will post the air date of the interview. Things seem to be moving along quickly for us.

Eric

Uhm..yeah.  If you are a parent or teacher at a school where Eric gave his motivational speech,  you should probably get your kids brainwashed immediately.  That’s probably the type of motivational speech they need to forget.

For safety’s sake, we should probably get Gan Matthews brainwashed, too.  That would actually be a pretty good sweeps week story for the folks at Channel 9.  Imagine watching CSI, and then having Kelly Ogle on a promo cut in say “Watch Gan Matthews get his memories of a child molester author erased tonight at 10.”   That would get some ratings, for sure.

* Clark Matthews also told me not tell anyone he wears a three wolf t-shirt. Oops.

Colege is for losers…

Wednesday, August 26th, 2009

This picture has been floating around Twitter the past week or so, so we figured it would be a good idea to post it on our site for the 99% of you who don’t use Twitter.

osu colege bound

Uhm…you know our good old pal Jim Traber attended Oklahoma State colege University.  He also has a daughter who is a sorority girl school at the pathetic sissy school to the north.  Coincidence…probably not.