Oklahoma City News, Entertainment & Occasional Humor • Established 2007

Tradition of Disappointment

(Editor’s Note:  Gravy Train is our newest contributor at The Lost Ogle.  You may be familiar with his work from the now defunct Red Dirt Kings.  Red Dirt Kings was a snarky local group blog that focused primarily on sports, hot chicks and other random things.  Yeah, he should fit in well.

Return of the mack.

New website. Same badassness.

I am an unabashed fan of the University of Oklahoma Fighting Sooners. Though I am in the minority in that not only did I attend OU, but I actually received a degree from said university. Yes, we do exist. Needless to say, the results of Bedlam went over well at the Train’s palatial midtown estate. And provided yet another disappointment in a long line of disappointments for OSU fan.

In fact one could argue the Cowboys’ most recent loss to the Sooners was the biggest sporting disappointment for OSU fan in the history of it’s storied athletic program. Yes, I just wrote that without hyperventilating.

But OSU fan does not have a monopoly on sports-related disappointments.

Jenn Sterger not meeting me at O’Connell’s for a campus tour

On September 5, 2005, the Florida State cowgirls were introduced to the world.

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A few days later and long before Brett Favre showed her Mr. Blue Vein, the now infamous Jenn Sterger registered and began posting on OUInsider.com … allegedly. I say allegedly because I have no way to prove the handle “JennSterger” was actually Jenn Sterger. But I am a trusting and naive individual, so of course it was her. Who would make up such a thing? After all, everything on the internet is true.

After sending her naked pictures engaging her in a rousing discussion about the merits of the Protestant Reformation and it’s effect on modern theology, she mentioned a possible visit to Norman during an OU football game that fall, much to the delight of myself and the other life winners that post on OU message boards. Did I mention that maybe I lived in Norman and that I could give her a thorough tour of the campus*? Perhaps. Did she indicate we would meet at O’Connell’s during the Kansas State game? Who remembers this stuff anyway!

All I know is that it is NOT pathetic for a 30-something husky to sit outside of a college bar waiting 3 hours for a quasi-famous hot chick who I met on the internet. No matter what my wife says.

*aka “my pants”

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BBS (not BBJ) retiring

When Bob Barry announced his retirement at the end of 2010 from broadcasting, Oklahoma City sports fans rejoiced, especially this one. No longer would we be subject to tired, worn out and generally uninformed sports opinions from 9 am to noon on the Sports Animal. Pat Jones could now do alone what he had been doing for the last few years – carry late morning sports radio in Oklahoma City. No more ridiculous takes on Boston sports.  No more calls from the 8 listeners who take BBJ’s opinions as gospel. No more off the cuff guesses masquerading as solid sports opinion. And most of all, no more bleeding ears.

Then I actually read the press release. Bob Barry SENIOR is retiring at the end of the year.

*shakes head in disappointment*

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The Blazers folding

I was disappointed Oklahoma City had a hockey team that folded. I became much less disappointed when I realized I didn’t care that Oklahoma City had a hockey team, much less one that folded.

I went to a game (match?) once. I became drunk, then bored. Or vice versa. I wandered into a Tombstone Pizza Employee Appreciation Night party. Food and beverages were aplenty. They were giving away door prizes. I “won” 6 Coors Lights. They were tasty. Unlike frozen Tombstone pizzas, which taste like the lid of a construction barrel, even when you are high.

The Hornets draft Hilton Armstrong and that other guy

After one highly successful season of basketball in Oklahoma City, it was my belief the New Orleans Hornets would never return to the Big Easy. The NBA had decided that the Hornets were to return for a 2nd season. New Orleans lost half their population. The city was in no way ready for the NBA. The Oklahoma City Hornets seemed plausible for the long term.

I and many others were interested in the NBA draft. The Hornets had Chris Paul and David West. They signed Peja Stojakovic. They had two first round selections. The future was bright, especially if the Hornets were able to draft couple of contributors in the 1st round.

With the 12th pick in the 2006 NBA draft, the Oklahoma City/New Orleans Hornets select … Hilton Armstrong?! A guy who averaged greater than 4 points per game ONE season in college. The Hornets passed on Ronnie Brewer, a career double digit scorer, and Rajon Rondo, NBA All-Star, for a defensive “whiz” who has averaged … wait for it … less than 4 points per game over his career (shocker), and 2.6 rebounds per game to boot.

Could they do worse with the 15th pick? Um, yes.

Cedric Simmons. Career averages of 2.2 points and 1.9 rebounds per game. And he is out of the league. Has been for two years.

Attaway to keep the momentum going.

Alcohol Free Santee Lounge

A dear friend of mine invited me to join him for an OU game this year in seats what he termed were “club level.” I was skeptical. I have viewed an OU game from the “club level” before (a suite to be exact, because I am better than all of you). I remember most of the first half. Then I remember waking up in a puddle of my dog’s urine. To ensure these seats would lead to certain drunken shenanigans, I had said friend take a picture of the tickets. I called the ticket office. The guy at the other end of the phone  informs me my dreams of the perfect football game have come true again – our tickets allow us into the Santee Lounge with access to booze.

Hells. Yes.

Or so I thought.

Turns out the guy at the other end of the phone was a liar. Or an idiot. Or just thought it would be fun to screw with me. Needless to say I was disappointed when I discovered the Santee Lounge provides crappy stadium food and non-alcoholic beverages at no reduced price. No booze. No hookers. No blow. Just a nice place to hide from the daywalkers for a few minutes. It was a long sober ride back to OKC.

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Comments

  1. There is blow in the Santee Lounge. You just didnt look in the right place. And the hookers only show up for night games.

  2. Is it any surprise the league now owns that team? They surrounded Chris Paul players like Hildric Simstrong and returned to a city that didn’t support the team before their population halved.

  3. Sounds like you have a better experiance than I did in your first trip to the club level. I went there once, they had a buffet, tons of booze and food, yada, yada, yada. But no one was into the game it was mainly a social event. It was like yuppie douches x’s 10. They even began mocking the crown in the stands when they were doing some cheers. I imagine other than the name Bob Stoops, no one could name a single player. After that experience, I turned down offers to come back to the club level and stuck with the ruffians in the stands. Heck, even the old people who sit then entire game cheered more for the Sooners.

  4. You know the Blazers used to say “…home of the Blazers!” at the end of the Star-Spangled Banner.

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