Saturday night, I received several emails from Ogle Moles informing me that Christina Fallin got engaged (again). They assumed this because some dude posted the following photo on Instagram:
You know how you can see a pic of a cow eating grass and just go ahead and assume the image is legit, because what do you know, cows eat grass? Well, that’s what happened to our Moles. They saw an Instagram pic of some bearded hipster putting a ring on Christina Fallin’s hand, along with a caption “#shesaidyes,” and just assumed she was engaged again. Who cares the engagement ring was the same type you’d get from a vending machine in front of a grocery store for a quarter (or for $5 at Blue Seven). This is Christina Fallin. That seems like something “hip” and “ironic” that she’d totally do.
Unfortunately, that’s not the case. It looks like the whole thing was just a gag between a pair of über hipsters. That’s probably good for Christina Fallin and our list of 2013 predictions. It’s probably bad for future material on this website.
On that note, we’ve given Christina Fallin a hard time on TLO for her marriages…and divorces…and engagement photos…and weird music videos…and pink hair, but at least she seems to have a good sense of humor about it all and doesn’t take herself too seriously. How else could you explain the photo above or the pics from that recent fashion shoot in the December issue of Oklahoma Magazine.
Wait, I never told you all that Christina Fallin posed for a fashion shoot in the December issue of Oklahoma Magazine. I guess I forgot about it. The photos belong in the “Trying Too Hard” Hall of Fame. Check them out:
I’m not sure what’s going on in this photo? Why is there grass indoors? Why does she look like she’s about to pee on the grass? And why’s there a futuristic ashtray in the background?
First of all, I think she bought that shirt while vacationing on Cybertron with her mom last summer. Also, what’s more embarrassing? Christina taking a photograph in the Omniplex mirror maze, Christina probably getting lost in the Omniplex mirror maze, or me knowing it’s the Omniplex mirror maze because I was an Omniplex apprentice in 8th grade?
(By the way, I know it’s not called the “Omniplex” anymore. I refuse to call the place by its new stupid name “Science Museum Oklahoma.” That’s about as bad as Walt Jr. changing his name to Flynn. At least Walt Jr. had family problems.)
I honestly can’t think of anything to write about that photo, because every time I look at it I laugh uncontrollably. It’s like a Valentine’s Card for the damned.
Speaking of laughing uncontrollably, I wonder how hard it was for the photographer to contain his laughter when Christina said “Can we take a photo in front of the Einstein painting?”
F-ck it. I give up.
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