Oklahoma City News, Entertainment & Occasional Humor • Established 2007

Caption Contest: Dog the Bounty Hunter hanging with State Senator David Holt

dog bounty hunter oklahoma

Famed bounty hunter Duane “Dog” Chapman was honored by lawmakers at the State Capitol yesterday. Apparently, he was in town to promote regulation of the bounty hunting industry.

Via CBS News:

TV’s most famous bounty hunting couple is making a push for stricter regulations on themselves and their peers in Oklahoma.

Reality stars Duane “Dog” Chapman and his wife Beth of A&E’s now-defunct “Dog the Bounty Hunter” series met with lawmakers at the state capitol in Oklahoma City on Tuesday to discuss tougher bounty hunting guidelines in the Sooner State.

The couple say they want to make sure that the laws are fair for all parties involved.

“We want to make sure that the citizens of Oklahoma know that we are for regulation, we are for licensing, we are for certification, but we have to keep this in a realm we can deal with,” Beth Chapman told KWTV’s Rusty Surette [watch video above] at the capitol.

The Chapmans have been working with Republican state Sen. Ralph Shortey on tweaking language in a proposed regulation bill for Okla. bounty hunters.

“We’ve seen several instances over the last few weeks…over the last couple of years really, where bounty hunters have really gotten out of control in Oklahoma,” Shortey said.

“Now is the time to get laws in Oklahoma so these things can not happen again. Someone’s pet can’t be destroyed. Someone can’t be held against their will,” Dog said.

The Chapmans plan to soon open an office in Oklahoma City.

Couple of thoughts:

• Can someone check Ralph Shortey’s temperature? Was he attacked by another turkey? Not only did he introduce anti-free market legislation that expands the reach of the government by adding extra layers of paperwork, bureaucracy and regulation, but the law actually makes sense! The only thing bounty hunters in Oklahoma are good at is killing innocent dogs. Seriously, is something wrong with Ralph Shortey? Did he eat some human embryos for breakfast and suddenly have a philosophical awakening?

• Screw Dog the Bounty Hunter. Why can’t Boba Fett get any love? Even though George Lucas tried to ruin some of his mystique by introducing that terrible origin story in the prequels, Boba Fett is still the coolest bounty hunter to ever not exist. Maybe we can get Jedi OKC to lobby for an Oklahoma Boba Fett day? As a tribute, we can have an artist create a life-size bronze sculpture of Sally Kern frozen in Carbonite.

Anyway, you would think that with a guy like Dog roaming the capitol grounds that we’d get some good pics. Unfortunately, that’s not the case. The best one I could find was this pic of Dog posing with State Senator David Holt. I thought it would be fun to have a photo caption contest for it.

Here’s the pic:

dog david holt

My submissions:

“I like your sunglasses, Governor Fallin.”

“I can’t wait to add this to my Wikipedia page!”

“Wow. Your ass is almost as firm as Mayor Cornett’s. Can I kiss it, too?”

“He’s no good to me dead.”

Have fun, Moles. Just like in our other competitions, whoever submits the best caption will win an ink pen that I’ll continually forget to mail.

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Comments

  1. Uphold DOMA? CHECK. Honor a guy that has been married 5 times. DOUBLE CHECK. Fail to recognize the hypocrisy in anything? TRIPLE CHECK.

    • According to Wikipedia, Dog used to be a gang member and was convicted of 1st degree murder. So I’m thinking him being married 5 times is probably the least awful thing he’s done in his life. LOL!

  2. Man Wayne Coyne looks hammered and damn his wife (ex) has gained some serious effin weight! And why is Damon Lame photo bombing this pic wearing his casual clothes?

  3. “We need you to take care of this guy Patrick who keeps requesting documents that we don’t want anyone to see.”

  4. “So, you say that scent is jasmine, lavender, rose hips and a little Tahitian vanilla?’

  5. The guy on the left looks like a tall Ray Morranno in “Everybody Loves Ray”that ended it’s run but is still in syndication.

  6. It’s good to know that there are good bounty hunters out there that have other aspirations in life besides stepping all over a private citizen’s rights in Their homes!That bounty hunter that shot that poor little dog,should spend a lifetime either in prison,or He’ll!

    • Errr…Hell,that is! Sorry for the misspell,obviously the Spelling brigade will be all over Me for mispelling Hell!

  7. “I can’t wait haul one of these Okie politician’s asses to jail someday when they skip bail after being charged with embezzling funds from Dorman’s Federal Constitutional Defense Fund,” Beth thought.

  8. “Damn, Dog…I loved you in The Wrestler. Wanna go save some fetuses and spit on gay people?”

  9. Give the guy on the left a blonde wig and the scent of cheap cigarettes and he’ll look just like an Oklahoma Republican.

  10. Senator Holt was surprised when he put his arm around Dog and realized this wasn’t his recurring wax museum dream.

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