It’s that time once again when we all run to the grocery store and buy 5 pounds of candy, only to have consumed it before it’s time to give it to the neighborhood kids. It’s a time of half-assing a costume so you can attend a party thrown by people who get way into the holiday. It’s a time to enjoy the last holiday before your seasonal depression really sets in and makes you cry uncontrollably at family functions. It’s Halloween! And, according to a Mustang resident, it’s time to make your neighbors think you’ve totally murdered someone with your garage door.
MUSTANG, Oklahoma -
A Halloween prank is putting neighbors in a panic in Mustang.
Johnnie Mullins decided to get “gruesome” this Halloween. His yard features gravesites and ghosts up in a tree, but the real shocker is the fake dead body in the driveway.
“Just trying to scare people, that’s what I like to do,” says Mullins.
The dead body is placed in such a way that it looks like the garage door crushed its head.
“My heart about came out of my chest. I thought ‘Oh my God,’” says Rebecca Fuentes, who hopes Mullins gets rid of the body. “If I think it’s real, just think of what a child would think?”
“The kids that live in the neighborhood don’t freak out or anything. I’m sure they do at first,” says Mullins.
The fake body even prompted a 911 call. Police and firefighters responded.
Mullins was told he wasn’t breaking any laws and will continue to keep the phony body in place. In fact, he is adding another body that appears to have been run over by a truck.
“It’s Halloween. I don’t think it’s too far,” says Mullins.
Far be it for me to question someone’s holiday spirit. Dead bodies in the driveway is probably the best way to let the trick or treaters know that there is something slightly wrong with you. But I guess it’s no different than the folks who insist on lighting up their houses Clark Griswold-style for Christmas.
Now, I’m not the sort of person who is good at decorating, or even the type that actually does things she pins on Pinterest. But I do know this. A lot of Halloween decorations are overdone. Sure, your neighbors called the cops because they thought you murdered someone with your garage door. But don’t you think the dead bodies as decor thing is totally overplayed this time of year? I think it’s important that we not only express our grotesque inner need to terrify, we also need to get creative about it.
Why not make your haunting tableau an Oklahoma-inspired scene? Our recent past is pretty scary, just not in the blood and guts way. Like, what if you made a scene on your front yard that was like the Tate Publishing mass firing. You could shave your head, and yell at people how you’re like Jesus and that they’re fired. To me, there is nothing scarier than not knowing where your next paycheck is coming from.
Or, what about the site that is destined to become a plot point in a wedding-themed horror movie some day? You could make your house look like the Dominion House. Why people get married at a location that I used to sneak into during my high school days is beyond me. A haunted orphanage is no place for nuptials. And all this one requires is a bride and a groom, a ridiculously expensive wedding package, and a bunch of dead orphans milling around.
If you like social commentary, then why not decorate your yard like Shepherd Mall? Shepherd Mall will always have a place in my heart because that’s where my parents met. But the bustling shops have all been replaced with offices and a charter school. Imagine the once busy shopping mall filled with patrons. Now, the halls are empty. For this one, you just need a big open area, and the ghost of consumerism lurking in the shadows.
Maybe your an Oklahoma history buff. (Why wouldn’t you be? That was the best class in high school.) You could decorate your house like the Marland Mansion! What’s creepier than an old house? How about an old house that was inhabited by a man who married his daughter? I don’t even want to talk about what you need to do to set this one up. Maybe don’t do it, okay?
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