Oklahoma City News, Entertainment & Occasional Humor • Established 2007

So, I guess people still go to clubs in Bricktown…

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Last night, News 9 did a report on some place called Candy Nightclub OKC. I guess it’s the new popular club to visit in Bricktown, which means it will probably close within the next year.

Recently, the OKCPD cited the venue for overcrowding.

Via News 9:

Overcrowded nightclubs in Bricktown have the attention of the Oklahoma City Police Department.

A newly released police report reveals several Bricktown nightclubs are having issues with overcrowding. Officers cited a manager at Candy Nightclub early Sunday morning for failure to prevent overcrowding.

First of all, how’s this really news? Along with death and taxes, one of life’s few certainties is greedy club owners ignoring set capacity limits, and ironically enough, not paying taxes. Maybe News 9′s next report will expose the practice of filling empty bottles of Grey Goose with McCormick.

So, how many people were at this Bricktown nightclub that for some reason spells its name properly:

The capacity at Candy Nightclub is 280 people, according to police. Saturday night’s final count from Bricktown officers was 663 people.

Holy crap, 663 douche bags hanging out at one club in Bricktown and the police are trying to stop it? Are they nuts? If anything, we should treat this place like Hamsterdam from the Wire and encourage all douche bags to hang out there. Maybe even put a gym, tanning bed and laundry mat inside so they’ll never leave and recruit other douche bags. We could name Anthony David or DJ Boom as their leader and get In The Raw sushi to cater the food. Of course, I know what some of you are thinking: “What if something were to go tragically wrong at a foam party and they were all to drown!” Well, that would be tragic and hopefully the panda would get out okay.

Okay, okay, I’m just kidding. I don’t want all the douche bags in Bricktown to drown at a giant foam party. Although it would provide some great material, it would also be tragic and sad. Plus, they would then just open another club in its place. It really wouldn’t solve anything.

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Comments

  1. I feel safer knowing Sexual Harassment Panda’s on the job.

    Don’t say that, don’t touch there
    Don’t be nasty says the silly bear!

  2. I was at the Conservatory weekend before last. They’ve got a capacity of 87 according to the sign on the wall. I’ve never been to a RCR show with that few people.

    • That’s because the capacity has been downgraded several times in the past two years. Went from 250 to 87.

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