Oklahoma City News, Entertainment & Occasional Humor • Established 2007

This woman received life in prison for shoplifting

shoplifting lady

What do you think is a fair punishment for someone who has been caught shoplifting 29 times?  Community service, jail time, hands cut off, forcing them to do all their shoplifting at Old Navy?

I ask because the Oklahoma woman pictured above – Cecilia Rodriguez – was sentenced to life in prison for shoplifting. She was caught doing the act 29 times. Her appeal of the sentence was recently denied by the U.S. Supreme Court. That really sucks for her… and for us as taxpayers. We now have to spend $18,000 per year to imprison her because she’s a bad thief. Hopefully she’ll get some thieving tips from fellow inmates while in jail.

From NewsOK.com:

The U.S. Supreme Court declined on Monday to review the case of an Oklahoma City woman who received a life sentence in 2009 for shoplifting.

Without comment, the court rejected the appeal of Cecilia Cathleen Rodriguez, whose life sentence was imposed by an Oklahoma County judge because of a long list of previous convictions.

Rodriguez’s appeal was her second to the high court; in 2012, the justices sent the case back to Oklahoma and ordered a review of whether she had received adequate legal assistance when she entered a “blind plea” to charges of stealing two purses from a Dillard’s department store.

An Oklahoma County judge ruled that Rodriguez understood when she rejected a plea agreement of 17 years in prison that she could receive a sentence ranging from four years to life…

The judge who sentenced her called her a one-person crime wave….

She may be eligible for parole after serving 15 years of the sentence, according to a legal filing in the case.

Life in prison for shoplifting seems kind of harsh, but you probably deserve it if you’re caught 29 times. Hell, she probably deserves that just for being a bad shoplifter. Was she trying to smuggle hams under her shirt? If she really wanted to be a successful shoplifter, she should have scored a job as a Dillards security guard. Sure, it’s a long con, but do you want to do this right or not?

Instead of using taxpayers money to lock this lady away, I say we give her a reality show! Who wouldn’t want to watch a show about a junkie that goes around getting caught shoplifting? To satisfy the judge, we could even call it “One-Person Crime Wave?” Thanks, judge!

It really is a great idea. Instead of spending our tax dollars keeping her behind bars, we’ll have a camera crew follow her around 24/7. That way she’ll be under constant surveillance, the world can enjoy the antics of a heroine addict, and the state can make money off the advertisements. It wouldn’t be anymore of a train wreck than Honey Boo Boo, or Duck Dynasty, or Real Housewives of OKC. It’s win/win/win!

“One-Person Crime Wave,” coming this Fall to a TV near you! Expect a call from me very soon, Annette Colbert-Latham.

For other TV show ideas follow @SpencerLenox on Twitter.

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Comments

  1. Maybe somebody somewhere along the line should’ve said “hey, maybe she needs some help?”
    Nope. Cage her for life.

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