Yesterday, News 9 sent bulldog reporter Steve Shaw to Lake El Reno for a live report on concerns that blue algae may shut down this weekend's "Smoke On The Water" drag boat races. They sent Steve because:
A) He's a cold-blooded, All-American everyman who likes his news hot and his Fireball hotter. Seriously, is there a more perfect reporter to cover Oklahoma lakes, algae and drag boats races than Steve Shaw? If you were allowed to pick one non-female media personality to take to Lake Tenkiller for a rowdy party weekend, Steve would be the top choice. Not only does he probably own a 1997 Kawsaki jet ski and giant titanium ice chest that can hold 48 Coronas, six limes and even a pint of mustard potato salad from the Buy For Less deli, but he'd also entertain you with stories about the single ladies he met the weekend before at Russell's.
B) Who else are they going send? Grant Hermes? Justin Daugherty? They probably think blue algae is newest fragrance from Bath and Body Works.No offense, but Steve Shaw would eat those pretty boy millennials for breakfast and then chug them down with a swig of Captain Morgan.
Anyway, here's his report:
News9.com - Oklahoma City, OK - News, Weather, Video and Sports |
One thing I forgot to mention about Steve is that he's also a professional. That smile, story progression, and sweet articulation of words was poetically impressive. I'm sure it was difficult for him to keep his composure during the live report. I thought he was going to go all Randy "Macho Man" Savage on us and challenge Kelly Ogle to drag boat race while crushing cans of Keystone Light against his forehead, but he kept his cool.
Anyway, I guess we'll stay tuned in to News 9 this week for more updates on "Smoke on the Water" and the further adventures of "Street Outlaws H2O (ha ha ha). For Steve's wall's sake, I hope it's not cancelled.
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