When your only job is to cover college football season, specifically OU and OSU, and neither team plays, and the college football schedule was what it was Saturday, you mail it in. I spent two days trying to think of 10 topics to discuss, none of which related to OU and OSU’s play on the field, and it wasn’t happening. Alas, I bring you 10 musings minus 3.
7) College football took a break this week
The week that wasn’t. One top 25 matchup. Two single digit spreads in games featuring a top 25 team. Four top 25 teams scoring at least 70 points. Savannah State was a 60 point dog for the third time in 2 years, and Miami covered even with a limited, twelve minute fourth quarter (just stop playing football and go home, drunk Savannah State football team). Three other top 25 teams won by 45 plus points. College Gameday was in Fargo for God’s sake. You know Fargo, that hotbed of college football for players who weren’t good enough to walk on at Wyoming or Minnesota.
So I’ve been busy this past week and haven’t watched TV, surfed the World Wide Web, or turned on the radio. Or talked to any person in the state of Oklahoma. What’s the new word? Anything exciting going on in the area? So did that article about the OSU football atrocities have any legs? Oh … oh really …
10) OSU dismantled Lamar
I mean, what do you say about the Cowboys destroying a horribly over-matched FCS team in the home opener 59-3? That this was just another step on the road to a national championship? That this huge home opener will propel OSU to a second conference championship in three years? I guess Poke fan wants me to say who great the offense looked and how the defense held the mighty Cardinals to 3 points.
Welcome to my weekly OU / OSU Football Power Poll, or as most of you call it, the one post that includes pics of college girls. This week OU beat West Virginia in a strange win that felt like a loss, and OSU won its first road game against UTSA. That’s the University of Texas at San Antonio. Embarrassing.
10) Trevor Knight …
Well, at least Trevor Knight the OU quarterback is now the first thing that comes up when you perform a Google image search of his name.
How is this guy the best passer on the team? And he isn’t even scanning the entire field. He has to make a single read. The coaches have dumbed down the pass plays so much, he looks to one side of the field, then either throws a bad pass, or scrambles. I know he is young and needs time to develop, but against two average at best defenses, his completion percentage is under 50% with just over 200 total passing yards in both games … combined.
Of course, we all know how the “Knight” ended, with a good old fashioned …
First weekend of the college football season. Which of course meant getting hammered at 9 am in Norman while smoking some brisket, ribs, and chicken awaiting certain disappointment in a few months
Oh, that was last year. And the several years before life kicked me in the crotchel region. I was in Kansas City. With my in-laws. And my 2 kids under the age of 3. Playing golf on Saturday. And having a family gathering that evening.
(Editor’s Note: Due to popular demand, Gravy Train is returning this year for his smug little college football power poll. Read at your own risk.)
Like the herpes you scored one Thursday night in 2011, I return. A few liver enzymes less. A few pounds more. Another child added.
Unlike these hipsters who spend the majority of their time drinking PBR at Henry Hudson’s (Editor’s Note: Hipster’s at Hudsons? Really???) and composing witty commentary on this locally famous, moderately relevant blog, I have been busy at my palatial midtown estate raising two children within 30 months of each other and running a successful law firm. So apologies for the absence, but eff you and my social life/sleeping patterns.
Alas, Patrick allows me to return for yet another football season sure to be filled with idiotic musings and soul crushing disappointments. Or, as my wife calls it, date night.
10) OU Quarterback
“I totally saw this coming. I knew Trevor Knight was going to be the guy replacing Landry Jones all along!” Said no one ever.
I watched Blake Bell play markedly better than Trevor Knight last spring. I saw in Knight a lack of confidence. I saw a quarterback with less physical skills both through the air and on the ground than BOTH Blake Bell and Kendal Thompson. He didn’t look like a Division I quarterback.
Now, here we are a couple of months later and the prohibitive favorite to win the quarterback position is relegated … again … to short yardage and goal line duties, assuming Knight can’t get that done on his own. The insiders will tell you Knight grasped the offense quicker than Bell, which is as much a knock on Bell as praise on Knight. TK looked better through the air. He runs the zone read with greater explosion. And perhaps the public would have an opinion if Coach didn’t pattern the program’s security after the Bourne trilogy (yes, there are only three of them).
This competition might be over for the coaching staff, but after a drive or two against Louisiana Monroe, classic OU daywalker will re-institute his favorite pastime – bitching about something and calling for a backup.
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