Did you know that some people wake up super early in the morning to watch golf tournaments? I had no idea. But that’s the great thing about Twitter. It totally opens my eyes to the weird things that complete strangers do. I can’t say that I have ever woken up early to watch anything on television, but I have combed through all the tweets to tell you precisely which local celebrities would do such a thing. Also, this is probably some sort of feat of super strength, because I have been operating under the impression that golf is on TV on Sunday afternoons so your dad can sleep in a recliner. But to stay awake during normal sleeping hours to watch it? That’s pretty impressive.
Anyway, this week’s tweets are after the jump!
Rumors are awful most of the time. Except for the rumors about how cool I am and how much game I have. Those are totally cool. But not the rumors that two blonde girls from middle school started about me. Do you hear me, Sequoyah Middle School football players circa 1998? I did not do lesbian porn, regardless of what Kasey and Carissa said.
Now, in middle school, I didn’t do anything about the rumors. It was easier to lay low. But not everyone can do that. Some people get mad and have a confrontation. And that’s what happened when a metro woman found out her neighbor spread a rumor that she had sex with her cat. From NewsOK.com:
Here we are on Monday again, and I’ve got some tweets for you to peruse. It was a strange week for Twitter. Everyone basically had overblown opinions either about that Sharknado movie or the Zimmerman trial verdict. In either case, it seemed like no one really understood what was going on. At least in the case of #Sharknado, everyone got out all of their jokes and will never have to use them again, hopefully. Because it seems like if you weren’t live tweeting the Sharknado movie, you were tweeting about how stupid it was that people were live tweeting the Sharknado movie. All this lead me to log out of Twitter and check out Facebook. Please don’t ever make me do that again.
This week’s tweets are after the jump.
Oklahoma City is definitely the most. The most what? Well, it depends completely on which list you consult, but we have definitely been granted more than our fair share of superlatives. They’re pouring in so fast KFOR has to bundle them together:
OKLAHOMA CITY– Two surveys were released with Oklahoma City making it into the top ten.
However, the results have some people scratching their heads.
Sharecare’s RealAge Test ranked Oklahoma City as number 6 in the “Top 10 Cities for Red Meat Lovers.”
Sharecare says, “Home to one of the largest livestock markets in the world, it’s no surprise that Oklahoma City ranks high on our list. Residents here love their meat, but aren’t too keen on eating vegetables, fruits or whole grains, which contributes to high rates of hypertension and cholesterol.”
The same company says Oklahoma City ranks 4th in the “Top Cities for Aging.”
That wasn’t the only study to focus on Oklahoma’s weight issues.
According to a study by Facebook, Oklahoma City ranks number eight on “Facebook’s Fittest Cities” list.
Organizers of that survey say they studied fitness related mentions on social media, including check ins and use of fitness apps in cities with at least 200,000 Facebook users to determine their top picks.
In only a matter of months, we’ve gone from the least healthy city in the country to the fittest. Granted, to determine fitness, they counted FB mentions and fitness apps. So your office mate who has been on Weight Watchers since 1978 and posts the first workout from Couch to 5K when she restarts it every six weeks is probably skewing the average.
In all honesty, I hate these lists. It feels like that section of the yearbook where all the popular kids ranked each other and gave themselves titles like most likely to succeed, best smile, and best couple. And, as we all know, the years are not kind to these folks, because they typically wind up doing jail time, with a meth mouth, and divorced by 21, respectively. And just like those people, Oklahoma City is either on the list of fattest cities, or the list of most improved not so fatty fat cities. We never hold the title for long. When it comes to weight and health, we are the Oprah Winfrey of cities.
But what if there were lists that we actually belonged to? You know, ones that didn’t include buzz words or ones that weren’t created by a marketing team after conducting tons of research? That’s why I’ve created a list of ten lists that would totally make sense for us to be on.
Last week brought us a lot of Fourth of July tweets from our favorite Okies. There were parties, hotdogs, swimming pools, and of course, lots and lots of Instagrams and Vines of fireworks. I did not include any of those because they were all blurry. And if you’ve ever seen a fireworks display, then you know that it’s a lot of brightly colored flashes that explode across the sky and that the Kelvin filter doesn’t do much for them.
Anyway, your Monday Morning Tweets are after the jump!
Thanks! Your message has been sent!