Oklahoma City News, Entertainment & Occasional Humor • Established 2007

Author Archive for Marisa – Page 22

The Oklahoma State Fair has revealed some new foods for 2013…

It’s almost September, and I think we all know what that means. The State Fair is just around the corner! That’s right! It’s that time of year when you pop a Prilosec, call in sick to work, and go eat your weight in grease while you trudge through the midway that’s probably coated in a rain-induced gravy of sorts.

If you’re like me at all, you spend weeks planning what you’re going to eat. Screw those people who get a freaking turkey leg every year. There is no way that turkey leg can be anywhere near as satisfying as anything that is covered in chocolate, unnecessarily deep-fried, or made of gratuitous bacon. Ditto goes for your corn cobs, corn dogs, and Indian tacos. The fair is the one time you can be an adventurous eater and consume more calories in one sitting than you usually consume in one week.

We here at The Lost Ogle are pretty excited for the fair, and even more so for the new food offerings that are being introduced this year. And because my brain responds to food the way most peoples’ brains respond to sex, I’ve made a list of the foods that will have you all excited to get discounted entry into the fair when you bring a Coke can. Check them out after the jump!

Monday Morning Tweets: Kelly Ogle wants a mullet

Here we are again, another Monday morning. And while your work day is totally going to suck, at least I’ve brought you the tweets you need to read in order to get your day on the right track. I haven’t included any OKC mayoral race candidate tweets, because that election is nowhere near happening and I’m totally already burned out on it. Maybe I’ve seen The Wire too many times, but I can’t help but wonder which of the candidates will be our Tommy Carcetti. Also, I spend a lot of time looking for the region of OKC that would most closely resemble Hamsterdam. Anyway, this week’s tweets are after the jump.

Rep. Markwayne Mullin really doesn’t like it when people eat

399px-Markwayne_Mullin,_official_portrait,_113th_Congress

I’m sure that it has crossed your mind on many occasions that the individuals elected to office in no way represent you or your interests. Suffice it to say that politicians generally have no idea what the people want, so much so, that I’m almost positive that many Oklahoma politicians simply say things to please the grumpy old white men who wandered over to their town hall meetings after running errands at the Tractor Supply. This is not to say that we don’t have some gems in the bunch, because we do. I just think at times, we have more caricatures of ideologies in office than we have real people.

Hence, Markwayne Mullin. Mullin is a Republican representative for Oklahoma’s second congressional district whose first name is literally Markwayne. He also owns a plumbing company that took a hefty chunk of stimulus dollars for a job, though Markwayne is totally against that. Also, for a businessman, Markwayne kind of doesn’t know math. Like, at all. From a story on thinkprogress.org:

Monday Morning Tweets: Steve takes on the Cherokee Nation

It’s been one hell of a week out there. And I have the tweets to prove it. Can I just say that I can’t wait until football season when we get all the drunk tweets that tell Bob Stoops and Mike Gundy exactly what they need to do in order to win games? Those are my favorite. Nothing like someone typing “run the ball bob” into their phone to let you know that they could really take OU to a championship. Anyway, we don’t have any of those tweets yet. This week’s tweets are after the jump.

A man brought dead chinchillas into a zoo

622px-Chinchilla-Patchouli

In the seventh grade, my science teacher had a chinchilla in her classroom that you could take home on the weekends if you signed up to do so. Everyone was pretty keen on it, what with us being super nerds and not the cool sort of 13-year olds who were smoking pot. One weekend, the major booger eater in our grade took the chinchilla home and when she brought it back, it was dead. Some of the girls cried about it, and many accused the booger eater of killing it (the suspected murder weapon was boogers, which is probably not a very good way to kill a chinchilla). Our science teacher ruled it as old age, and there was no more classroom pet. Because of that experience, I now associate chinchillas with foul play, regardless of the cause of death for that particular creature.

And it would seem that the fine folks at the GW Interactive Zoological Park in Wynnewood probably now associate chinchillas with foul play too. According to a story on KFOR.com: