And I thought mispronouncing the word “Grotto” on a national radio show was going to be the highlight of my weekend.
Yesterday afternoon, while you were watching football or enjoying the record-breaking October heat, Marla Morgan, the wife of KFOR Chief Meteorologist Mike Morgan, chugged a bottle of Relax and sent us another email.
Here’s what the former Miss Rodeo USA had to say:
I’m still basking in the afterglow of being your recent Hot Girl Friday (HGF)….I can’t tell you how many doors it has opened and closed for me. I’m about to start calling you “Hef!”
Since you really do need updated pic’s, I thought I would send you a few of me without makeup from this past weekend…..besides being GREEN, do you know what I am? Here is a hint: I like your picture of extra large….um….brains from Star Trek and I love the best James T. Kirk of all time, William Shatner….I would be his squeeze.
Happy Halloween, and you know, once you go green, you never go back!
Uhm, will you all please add “Mike Morgan’s Basement” to the list of places to look if I ever turn up missing? Seriously, I’m pretty fucking terrified that I’m going to be kidnapped and end up in there, and I’m even more terrified that I don’t know who’s going to be responsible for it. Will it be Mike, Marla or will they co-conspire and pay Reed Timmer to do it? The only thing that’s certain is that they’ll use Emily Sutton as a lure.
Anyway, let’s check out these pics that Marla emailed to us.
Mobs of undead rise from their graves, witches cackle as they glide across the night sky, and somewhere there’s an empty tomb engraved with the name “Obama”—that’s right, it’s Halloween again and the metro has plenty to offer up in the way of creepy-crawly scares and ooky-spooky destinations this holiday season!
We all know about FrightFest at Frontier City (yawn) and the Haunted Warehouse in Bricktown (it it’s still open). This is a list of where to find real scares in the city this Halloween in the metro that’ll send chills up your spine, leave a tingle in your throat and goose bumps on your arms:
(Editor’s Note: This post was written and compiled by our new contributor New Tony. He’s different than old Tony who will remain Tony.)
1. The Governor’s Mansion
If you believe the old stories, this house is still haunted by a family of politically opportunistic ghosts. Eye witness accounts of the ghosts have varied, but most agree that they appear with a sickeningly pale pallor, and with a distinct, lifeless glaze over their eyes. Ghost tours are available throughout the year (the website just calls them “Governor’s Mansion Tours” for some reason), so take the whole family and be sure to bring your camera along— you never know when you might catch a wayward spirit on film!
This place is pretty spooky year round, yet the Halloween season always offers up some extra scares. Be warned, if you can survive all the toothless children screaming at their even-lesser-toothed parents over Hannah Montana costumes made in Taiwan by other toothless children for 90-cents, there’s no way you’ll survive the lines. The lines get everyone in the end.
And you thought fixing a couple of typos in granite seemed difficult.
Last night, someone drove their car on the Oklahoma State Capitol lawn and knocked over the controversial granite 10 Commandments Monument, breaking the state-endorsed symbol of religion into several large pieces.
Currently, there are no suspects for this act of vandalism, although authorities are searching for a person of interest described as a homeless Egyptian prince with a long beard who was last spotted talking to a burning bush outside Byron’s liquor store.
Here are more details via The Tulsa World:
Apparently there’s only one Pistol Pete and he lives in Stillwater.
Yesterday, the New Mexico AP reported that Oklahoma State is suing New Mexico State University on the grounds that NMSU has stolen OSU’s gun slingin’, whiskey drinkin’, cousin kissin’ mascot Pistol Pete. Or something like that.
Via an AP Story that has appeared all over the interwebs:
A powerhouse college is suing New Mexico State University, claiming the Aggies have plagiarized their mascot. The suit claims it is “confusingly similar” to its own and includes an image of Pistol Pete that NMSU has used in the past when it first adopted the mascot in the ’60s.
Oklahoma State University said it had the mascot first and trademarked it, then New Mexico State copied it. The university filed a lawsuit against NMSU in federal court on Monday.
NMSU said it initially paid royalties to OSU when it claimed Pistol Pete as its mascot about 50 years ago. OSU said it has had the mascot since the 1920s.
In the lawsuit, Oklahoma claims NMSU’s mascot image is “likely to cause confusion” and that it asked NMSU to “cease and desist from its infringement, but it has failed and refused to do so.”
NMSU said the suit came as a surprise, and students agree.
“I think it’s petty to be honest,” said Chelsae Keyes.
In a statement, NMSU officials said they are confident the schools will come to an agreement so they can keep using Pistol Pete. NMSU claims the suit is only referring to the older mascot image.
Yep, that’s real. The New Mexico AP really labeled Oklahoma State as a “powerhouse college.” Uhm, what exactly is Oklahoma State a powerhouse in? Wrestling? Actually, I guess they have a long, storied tradition in that dead homoerotic sport. Golf? Well, they are pretty good at putting things in a hole. Fundraising? It’s called Boone Pickens State for a reason. Female students who chew tobacco? Okay, so maybe OSU is a powerhouse at certain things.
Anyway, let’s take a look at these two logos to see what the problem is. Here’s the old New Mexico State logo:
The Furries are coming… again.
For the 11th year in a row, Roman Nose State Park in Watonga, Oklahoma, will be home to Oklacon, the largest outdoor furry convention in the world. And no, we’re not joking.
If you have live a sheltered life and don’t know what a furry is, it’s basically a person who likes to dress up in an animal or mascot costume and assume a different persona. A furry convention, on the other hand, is where furries gather to talk, interact, mingle and have sex with other furries while dressed in their costumes. Make sense?
Okay, okay, it’s not entirely that way. That’s just a stereotype. To get a better understanding of a furry convention, watch this highlight video from 2011:
So, who wants to drive up to Watonga and trip acid with me this weekend? That looks like the most amazing and or terrifying thing in the world. I wonder if Rumble was there in disguise…
Anyway, this is usually the part of the post where we examine the Oklacon website, crack some jokes and write other immature things in an attempt to boost our own self-esteem and feel better about our own normal mundane lives. But before we do that, let me tell you a kind of embarrassing, yet somewhat funny thing about me.
I was once a furry.
Well, kind of…
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