Oklahoma City News, Entertainment & Occasional Humor • Established 2007

Archive for Friday Night in the Big Town – Page 9

Friday Night in the Big Town: OKC Pride, Zoobilation and Impossible’s Road Show

Last Saturday, the European Space Lander “Philae” awoke from an 8-month hibernation on the lovely named comet, 67P/Churyumov–Gerasimenko. The washing-machine sized device was thought to be lost due to bad landing placement, not allowing the solar panels to receive sunlight. Being the trooper that it is, Philae beat the odds, like the space lander version of “Seabiscuit.”

This got me thinking, who closer to home have we not heard from recently?

Remember the scariest white rapper in Oklahoma City (or the world), Zero? We miss him. He wrote and recorded a Lost Ogle diss video. How many blogs can boast that? Not the Pioneer Woman or the Video Vigilante.

Not much has been heard on the Zero-front recently, at least I haven’t heard anything, but no one tells me things anyways. I hope Zero doing well and still fighting the man.

Where’s Brad Henry? I think we can all agree that we are really needing him at the moment. Since our current top executive sold the state’s title deed to the energy companies, as well as passing laws protecting them while taxing homeowners who use solar panels, we could use a government voice on our side, particularly one who gives a damn about the state’s citizens.

Rocketplane, where are you? We want our money back.

Here’s your Friday Night in the Big Town…

Friday Night in the Big Town: The Melvins, Earthquake Fighters & Classen Ten Penn

There is some big news from out of the 1990’s. PepsiCo, the corporation that peddles the re-bottled flat Coke product Pepsi, is hinting a return of their greatest gimmick, Crystal Pepsi. For the younger millennials who know a great column when they read one, but are not familiar with the product, here’s an introduction by the Sammy Hagar-ized Van Halen.

When the translucent carbonation debuted in 1992, the United States was besieged by Microsoft’s Windows 3.1, President George H.W. Bush puked on the Japanese Prime Minister and House of Pain released the future scourge of college football music “Jump Around.”

I was 12 years old and approximately 90 pounds of mayhem. I was young and dumb, exemplified by the fact I thought Pepsi was a quality product. However, to this day I believe Crystal Pepsi is the coolest beverage gimmick in my lifetime. It didn’t taste half-bad, though its texture was odd. It was kind of syrupy.

Crystal Pepsi was 90’s to the bone. If you were to throw slap bracelets, “I’m Too Sexy” and the dial-up internet sound into a blender, the result would be Crystal Pepsi. I look forward to revisiting this beverage and I invite all of you to try Crystal Pepsi, the choice of the last generation.

Here’s your Friday Night in the Big Town…

Friday Night in the Big Town: One-Man Lord of the Rings, Red Earth and a Lung Force Walk

NewsOK recently asked their community of readers why they live in and love Oklahoma. Scores responded by posting on social media with the #MyOklahoma tag. I forgot to participate in this event, likely because I was distracted by a brown sugar Pop-Tart, which is the third best flavor behind hot fudge sundae and strawberry, so I will toss a few out right now.

#MyOklahoma elects officials who feel it’s in the public’s interest to steal copper wiring from tornado sirens for a net profit of less than $40.

#MyOklahoma man-made earthquakes aren’t covered by many earthquake insurances.

#MyOklahoma First Daughter, Christina Fallin, is always good for a laugh or two.

#MyOklahoma is ripping my chronic allergies a new a-hole.

#MyOklahoma luckily is not home to wild cobras.

Here’s your Friday Night in the Big Town…’

Friday Night in the Big Town: OKC Pro-Am Classic, the Dancemosphere and stuff Made in Oklahoma

Cole Shafer-Ray

We don’t often get the chance here at The Lost Ogle to prop up the achievements of young Oklahomans, so today is special. Yesterday, Alcott Middle School student Cole Shafer-Ray placed first runner-up at the Scripps National Spelling Bee in Washington, D.C. This means he’s smarter than approximately 98% of our state legislature.

The word “acritarch” tripped up the mighty Oklahoman. Don’t feel bad Shafer-Ray, acritarch is currently underlined on my computer as misspelled. However, he wasn’t too happy.

Via NewsOk.com

“I’m pretty disappointed honestly because that word was the only word in the finals that I didn’t know how to spell,” Shafer-Ray said after the bee’s conclusion. “I would have been one of the co-champions, and that’s something I’ll have to live with the rest of my life.”

Woah, slow down there Quicksilver. I admire the competitive nature, but calm down. If you keep up this intensity, you will end up like this guy. Anyways, the tide was against in the first place. You’re a public school student and we all know the aforementioned state legislature gave up on that system long ago. Congrats!

Here’s your Friday Night in the Big Town…

Friday Night in the Big Town: Rocklahoma, Paseo Arts Festival and a march against Monsanto

In the insanely active merry-go-round that is late night talk show hosting duties, David Letterman signed off for the last time Wednesday night, packing in the “Late Show Top 10” and picking up all the pens and pencils he tossed through the windows behind him. Along with Conan O’Brien, Letterman is the last of the great classic talk show hosts.

There are multiple measures we can take to demonstrate how funny Letterman is, but to keep it simple, name as many reoccurring segments from his show off the top of your head. Stupid Pet Tricks, Stupid Human Tricks, Top 10, Small Town News, Rupert Jee, Larry “Bud” Melman. Let’s try Leno. Headlines and Jaywalking. Well, if you count “safe jokes about how slow the DMV is” as a segment, then it’s three. Dave’s funnier and overall a better organism than Jay.

Letterman has reignited my confidence and I will reengage talks with Patrick about my late show idea, “Overnight Ogle,” with Marisa as host, me as band director, Spence as announcer and cue card guy Patrick. It’s either this or my cool ranch-flavored toothpaste idea, because I really need the income.

From the home office in Sioux City, Iowa, here’s your Friday Night in the Big Town…