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Archive for Mary Fallin

Christina Fallin threw up on “Oklahoma Fashion Week”

Last week, Oklahoma Fashion Week came and went. If you missed it, consider yourself lucky. The event was promoted and organized by Oklahoma’s finest celebutante Hipster Boo Boo (a.k.a. Christina Fallin).

We know this because:

A) Hipster Boo Boo being involved in something like “Oklahoma Fashion Week” makes total sense.

B) Photos like this:

christina fallin mary fallin

Yes, that’s Mary and Christina Fallin at the Oklahoma Fashion Week media kick off. She, along with (retired) Major General Rita Aragon (this lady!), the Oklahoma Secretary of Military and Veteran Affairs, were the keynote speakers. Who would invite a crazy conservative Governor who wears open-toed shoes with hose (and a general who likes Glamour Shots) to kick off a fashion event? Oh, I know! Maybe some girl whose only source of credibility comes from her mom’s last name. Makes sense.

Seriously, Christina, get out of your mom’s shadow! Do something on your own! And by do something on your own, I don’t mean change your name to just “Christina” or run off and do awful projects with Wayne Coyne or Desmond Mason. That just makes you look even more desperate.

Anyway, if having Governor Fallin and General Big Collar didn’t convince you that Christina Fallin is the no-longer-pink-haired mastermind behind Oklahoma Fashion Week, check out these photos we grabbed of the kick off from some obscure local fashion website called “A Cuppa Fashion.” It doesn’t show any models wearing Native American headdresses, but it’s still good for a laugh:

It’s official. Mary Fallin is totally losing her mind.

I guess it’s time for Christina Fallin’s straight friends to write an angry letter to Governor Mary Fallin, too.

If you remember correctly, our State’s Chief Executive Derplahoman announced back in September that the Oklahoma National Guard will no longer process benefit requests for same-sex couples. She made the decision because the will of the Oklahoma people is to apparently defy federal law and treat homosexual servicemen and women who are willing to serve and protect this country as second-class citizens.

Well, now she’s taking things to a whole new crazy and embarrassing Sally Kernesque level. Check out this Randy Krehbiel story that published a few weeks ago in The Tulsa World. Governor Mary has instructed state-owned National Guard facilities to stop processing benefit requests for everyone:

Oklahoma will stop processing all military spouse benefit applications at state-owned National Guard facilities rather than begin accepting the applications from same-sex spouses, Gov. Mary Fallin said Wednesday.

Instead, military spouse applications, including those of same-sex couples, will only be accepted at four federally owned National Guard bases: the Air National Guard bases in Tulsa and Oklahoma City, the Regional Training Institute in Oklahoma City and Camp Gruber.

The applications are already being processed at the state’s five U.S. military installations: Fort Sill, Tinker Air Force Base, Altus Air Force Base, Enid Air Force Base and the McAlester ammunition plant.

The Fallin administration’s decision appears to be in defiance of Defense Secretary Chuck Hagel’s directive to process the applications of all spouses, regardless of sex, although Fallin maintained her solution complies with all “federal rules or policies.”

Fallin said the decision was reached in consultation with Attorney General Scott Pruitt.

“Oklahoma law is clear,” Fallin said in a statement.

“The state of Oklahoma does not recognize same-sex marriages, nor does it confer marriage benefits to same-sex couples. The decision reached today allows the National Guard to obey Oklahoma law without violating federal rules or policies. It protects the integrity of our state constitution and sends a message to the federal government that they cannot simply ignore our laws or the will of the people.”

Although Oklahoma owns most of the state’s National Guard armories and training centers, the facilities were built almost entirely with federal funds.

The federal government provides about 90 percent of the budget for the Oklahoma Military Department, which includes the National Guard.

I don’t know how or why, but I totally missed this article when it was released a few weeks ago. I guess I just assumed it was a regurgitation of the original story, or maybe my body is building up an immunity to the words and policies of nutty Oklahoma politicians. We should get OMRF to research a Derplahoman vaccine or something.

Fortunately, the national media recently picked up on the news and has exposed the Governor for being a backwards thinking, illogical, misguided bigot. My favorite article/column was written by Mark Joseph Stern over at Slate.

Here’s a snippet:

Mary Fallin doesn’t want you to criticize the A-F school grading system…

fallin open toe shoes governors association 2

Once again, I don’t pay a lot of attention to our state’s education system. This is because I fortunately don’t have any kids that legally belong to me. I know, I know, children bring joy and love and happiness into your life. That’s cool. The next time I’m drinking a mojito at 1:30pm or sleeping or not cleaning crayon off a wall, I’ll totally think about how happy you are.

On the topic of happiness, that’s a word that most people don’t mention when discussing Oklahoma’s A-F school grading system. Virtually everyone, especially professionals (a.k.a. teachers, administrators, superintendents) who have dedicated their lives to public education, hate the system. This is for several reasons, like it doesn’t accurately measure the performance of schools, depends too much on test scores, and seems to be the first part of conservative agenda to cripple public education in favor of for-profit charter and private schools.

Anyway, Governor Mary Fallin is fed up with all the people hating on her signature education law and she would like for them to stop.

Via The Tulsa World:

Mary Fallin launched her 2014 re-election campaign by parking cars like a crazy person…

fallin open toe shoes governors association 2

Yesterday afternoon, Oklahoma Governor Mary Fallin announced she is going to be the governor of Oklahoma from 2014 through 2018, or at least until Jim Inhofe dies. She did this in the form of something called a “re-election campaign kickoff.”

The Oklahoman’s new Birkenstock wearing hippie capitol reporter Graham Lee Brewer elaborates:

Oklahoma Gov. Fallin starts campaign for second term

Republican Gov. Mary Fallin, a former congresswoman, state House representative and lieutenant governor, launched her campaign for a second term as governor on Thursday at the Oklahoma History Center in Oklahoma City.

With the state Capitol and the Devon Tower looming in the background, Gov. Mary Fallin began her campaign for a second term Thursday at the Oklahoma History Center. She also made stops in Tulsa and Lawton.

A former congresswoman, state House representative and lieutenant governor, Fallin became Oklahoma’s first female governor when she took office in 2011.

In her first term, Fallin and her administration have focused on creating a pro-business economic climate in the state, pushing reductions in the state’s income tax and backing changes in the state’s civil justice system.

“I think our big goal moving forward is that blah blah blah blah blah

You know what, does it really matter? This lady’s going to win. She knows it, we know it, they know it and you know it. She could cuss out Andrew Speno, dye her hair pink and get caught doing coke with Wayne Coyne in the Blue Note bathroom and still coast to an easy victory. The only way she loses this thing is if zombies take over the world. Actually, that probably wouldn’t even matter. Zombies love Mary Fallin.

You can tell there’s some arrogance and overconfidence brewing in the Fallin camp. If you’re looking for proof, just check out the way her campaign staff parked their cars at the Tulsa stop on her campaign launch. The pic was apparently snapped in the early morning hours by an Ogle Mole. The car is parked in front of a bagel shop:

mary fallin white car magnet

They took up three parking spots and nearly blocked access to the handicapped one. I can understand them doing this at the French Market Mall on 63rd and May, but this was for a wildlypopular campaign launch. Other people need to park their cars and cheer for the governor, too.

Of course, I’m possibly just overreacting. Some savvy politico on the Fallin team realized the tacky mistake and fixed the problem:

Christina Fallin is hanging out in Southeast Asia with Desmond Mason….

mary fallin christina fallin weird lady

Next week, Governor Mary Fallin will be attending an air show convention in Paris, France.

Via NewsOK.com:

Gov. Mary Fallin will lead a delegation of aerospace companies and economic development agencies to participate in next week’s Paris Air Show.

The 50th Annual Paris Air Show, Monday through June 23, is expected to attract more than 200,000 visitors and feature more than 2,100 exhibitors representing 45 countries.

Two years ago, Fallin was criticized about the cost of sending four state officials to the air show, which is held every other year.

Records showed that the state paid for $400-a-night rooms at a luxury Paris hotel, $188 daily meal per diems and more than $3,000 in airfare. Fallin didn’t attend the show in 2011 but defended Oklahoma’s participation.

Several private Oklahoma-based aerospace companies, along with a delegation from the chambers of commerce in Ardmore and Oklahoma City, also participated in the 2011 show and reimbursed the state for nearly half the $154,000 total cost.

This year, more than 55 companies with a presence in Oklahoma will exhibit at the show. The Greater Oklahoma City Chamber, the Tulsa Regional Chamber and the Broken Arrow Chamber of Commerce all will be represented in the Oklahoma delegation.

This isn’t a surprise. Other than relaxing in her scalding hot tub, we all know that Governor Fallin’s favorite part about being the CEO of our state is taking “business trips” on the taxpayer’s dime. What is a surprise is, though, is that Christina Fallin won’t be tagging along on this trip like she did the Governor’s recent workcation to Boston. That’s because the pink haired fashionista is vacationing in Southeast Asia with Desmond Mason.

Wait? What? From Christina’s Instagram: