Published by Tony on January 3, 2008
Yesterday was January 2nd, which I personally believe is the best day of the year. It’s the official end of the holidays. No more presents to buy. No more decorations to hang. No more family and friends that I’m forced to pretend I like. Finally I can return to the life I’m used to living: wallowing in my own depression and self-loathing.
Also, it gives me a chance to plan out the holidays I’m going to celebrate during 2008. Contrary to popular belief, there are some holidays I actually enjoy. Mostly the ones that involve heavy drinking and some sort of idol worship. Anyway, here’s Tony’s Guide To The 2008 Holidays.
Continue reading ‘Holiday Guide ‘08′
Category: Gary England, Mike Gundy and The Lost Ogle.
It’s been a tough week for a CPA/blogger. A multitude of things has made it difficult for me to serve you, TheLostOgle.com reader. For one, year end is fast approaching which has created much work for me, meaning no downtime during the day to rattle off thousand word tomes about Tom Coburn investigating spending bills in search secret slush funds for recruiting lesbians in Southwest Oklahoma or a journal about me fighting holiday traffic. Second, it seems I have had a busy social life for the past couple of weeks. If I’m not out taking my kid to scream at Northpark Mall’s Santa Claus, I am actually being invited to Christmas parties…which is strange considering my behavior at parties is basically limited to standing against the wall and engaging anyone who comes across me in a debate about whether accrual or cash basis accounting is superior. (If you have to ask, the answer is accrual, you cretin.)
The last reason is that I have been contracted out by the Santa Claus to fill the stockings of Oklahoma’s finest citizens. Rather than waiting until Christmas morning to find out what is in store, I figured I would cut the suspense and let you know after the jump. Continue reading ‘Here Comes Santa Clark’
Category: Jenni Carlson, Jim Inhofe, Justice League of Oklahoma, Mike Gundy, OSU Basketball, Oklahoma Politics, Sean Sutton and The Lost Ogle.
Previously: An orange clad fat man overheard the Sooner coaches badmouth the OSU Cowboys. Bob Stoops brought a threat to the safety of quarterback Sam Bradford to The Justice League.
—————————— Continue reading ‘Justice League of Oklahoma (Episode 2.2)’
Category: Gary England, Justice League of Oklahoma, Lauren Richardson, Mike Gundy, OSU Football, OU Football, Oklahoma City Media, Oklahoma City Weather, Sports and Wayne Coyne.
Published by Patrick on November 26, 2007
Well, here are our last ten ideas for the Oklahoma Ideas Initiative. Overall, some of our ideas have been good, some have been bad, some have made no sense. To see all of them, check out our 100 Ideas Category.
10. Three words: EMPEROR GARY ENGLAND.
This is probably the best idea on the list. If you doubt it, just check out Gary’s online resume over at NewsOK.com. There you will learn that Gary:
• Was named Best Television Personality by the Oklahoma Gazette in 2001
• Was named One of the Outstanding Young Men of America, 1976 by something called Jaycees
• Was featured on Spiegel TV News (German Television) in 1999
• Is an expert witness in lawsuits involving weather
• Appeared in Living Magazine in 1978
Geeze. If stuff like that doesn’t convince you that Lord Gary should be emperor of Oklahoma or Oklahoma City or even Warr Acres, then you are a sad sad person. Or you are just Mike Morgan.
Continue reading ‘Oklahoma Initiative Ideas: 10-1′
Category: 100 Ideas, Gary England, Lauren Richardson, Mike Gundy, OU Football and Saving Grace.
For those who have not heard, tomorrow is Thanksgiving Day. One tradition at the Matthews household is that everyone at the dinner table must give a reason to be thankful before getting an turkey. So, I thought I’d bring that tradition to TheLostOgle. I’ll start:
Clark Matthews: I am thankful , of course, for my loving wife and one year old son…but also, having Tom Coburn and Jim Inhofe to provide me with material for articles.
Patrick Nelson is thankful amendments have been made to the Constitution of Oklahoma.
Tony Hanadarko says he is thankful for “his pet turtle“, but what he really gives thanks for is that he gets to walk on the same Earth as David Beckham.
Now, wasn’t that nice. As successful as this exercise was, I thought I’d extend it to some of Oklahoma’s more famous citizens. After the jump you will find out how some of your favorite Oklahomans answered this question:
What are you thankful for this Thanksgiving? Continue reading ‘What Are We Thankful For?’
Category: Amy McRee, Basketball in OKC, Brad Henry, Dean Blevins, Gan Matthews, Gary England, Hinder, Jenni Carlson, Jim Inhofe, Jim Traber, Lauren Richardson, Mick Cornett, Mike Gundy, Oklahoma City Media, Oklahoma Politics, The Lost Ogle, The Sports Animal and Toby Keith.
Published by Patrick on October 18, 2007
The other day, Clark, Tony and I were at The Lost Ogle headquarters debating what costumes we should wear for the Gazette’s “Ghouls Gone Wild” Halloween parade. Clark wanted to be a baseball player. Tony wanted us to dress up like Devo. I thought a costume based upon people or things related to Oklahoma seemed like a good idea.
Check out ten of these ideas after the jump:
Continue reading ‘Oklahoma Halloween Costume Ideas’
Category: Amy McRee, Gary England, Jenni Carlson, Mike Gundy, OKC Advertising, Oklahoma City Media, Sports and The Oklahoma Gazette.
The scriptures say, “judge not lest ye be judged.” In a post late last week, I chided The Oklahoman for sitting on the most intriguing story of the OSU/Sam Houston State game. Now, it looks like I might be guilty of a similar sin. In a story so perfect for TheLostOgle.com that it might as well have been scripted by Tony, Blazers’ hockey coach Doug Sauter literally stopped a stampede of horses with his teeth, and we haven’t made a single mention of it two weeks after the fact. That changes now.
It should not have been a huge surprise. I mean, look at his picture. With a mustache like that, Sauter has to be either a super villain or a superhero in disguise. Mild mannered minor league hockey coach was just too much of a stretch.
Here’s a brief synopsis of what happened:
- Sauter, who trains clydesdales, was in attendance at a Draft Quarterhorse Show at the Centennial Expo Building during the State Fair.
- A wagon being pulled by a team of horses overturned, injuring a 62 year old woman.
- Chaos ensued, as the wagon driver attempted to control his horses.
- The other horses at the show became antsy.
- Sauter jumped to action by biting a Belgian horses ear, calming it and putting a kibosh on the stampede it was about to lead.
“That’s how you stymie a horse,” Sauter said afterwards. He probably uttered it in a “matter-of-fact” tone, but I prefer to think he said it more taunting way. More like, “THAT’S how you stymie a horse!” Followed by an insincere single, “Ha.” I also picture him standing tall with his fists pushed firmly into his hips, staring to his left while the wind blows his whiskers behind him like a cape. (I may need therapy.)
Of course, this leaves us some interesting questions to ponder:
- Who was the arch-nemesis who almost started the stampede?
- Does anyone know Dean Blevins’ whereabouts at the time?
- Is Oklahoma City big enough for two superheroes?
- Will he and Gary England begin an Oklahoman version of the Justice League?
- Should Sauter be on hand for all Mike Gundy press conferences?
- Does Mick Cornett have a red phone hidden beneath his desk that goes directly to Sauter’s horse ranch?
- When will DougSauterFacts.com take over for Chuck Norris Facts?
Category: Dean Blevins, Gary England, Mike Gundy, OKC Blazers, The Lost Ogle and Unusual.
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