Archive for the 'Ogle Embed' Category

Gays On Parade

Published by
Clark Matthews
 on July 2, 2008

Sure, I may be 100% heterosexual, but I am sympathetic to the plight of the gay. Generally, I hate discrimination of any kind and am appalled at people assigning all the evils of the world on the behavior of people whose actions affect only themselves. Truth be told, however, I have not been exposed to many uncloseted gay people. I just haven’t. And some people may say that’s the reason I am sympathetic to their plight. If I were to be fully exposed to the flamboyance they display at, say, a gay pride parade, perhaps I too would be enlightened at the threat they pose on society.

Luckily for me, one of our MySpace friends gave us a heads up to the 21st Annual Oklahoma City gay pride parade, which I took my wife and son (his first parade!) along with me to attend. Now that the parade is old enough to drink, it was bound to be extra flamboyant. My findings after the jump:

Continue reading ‘Gays On Parade’

Category: Jack and Ron and Ogle Embed. 9 Comments

Clark Matthews Goes Medieval On Your Ass

Published by
Clark Matthews
 on April 11, 2008

It started off innocently. While checking my email, which I normally do 974 times a day without incident, this message from Tony was found in the inbox:

From: Hanadarko, Tony

Sent: Friday, March 28, 2008 12:17 PM

To: Nelson, Patrick

Cc: Matthews, Clark

Subject: Jenni Carlson deserves a Pulitzer

next weekend is the medieval fair in norman. it’s been years since i’ve been, but my recollection is that this is like the state fair of dorks. if either of you have nothing to do next weekend, it could provide some good material.

Being the good husband that I am, I begged off and I passed the buck to my wife. “With as much as I have been working, I can’t go without her and I doubt she’ll be up for going,” I replied. Then I made the mistake of actually telling her about it.

“(ClarkPupp) might enjoy that,” was all she said.

Conundrum. Her lukewarm endorsement meant I actually could go. Knowing Tony wasn’t going and that no amount of ale served in fancy containers could convince Patrick to attend, it was up to me to uncover the treasure trove of material available. Problem is, I didn’t want to go. So that meant I had to weigh the pluses and minuses of going.

  • Being surrounded by failed high school theatre geeks looking for an excuse to dress up in stage costumes and dust off their bad British accents. MINUS
  • Corndogs. PLUS
  • Taking my child to an outdoor festival. PLUS
  • Risking that my child will actually enjoy being around the Dungeons and Dragons crowd. MINUS
  • The cost: Free PLUS
  • Going to Norman. MINUS

After that exercise, I was right back to the drawing board. I finally decided to let the weather be the final arbiter, and I’llbedamned if it wasn’t perfect outside. So, that’s how I ended up at the Medieval Fair of Norman.

After the jump, I will share some observations and a few pictures. Continue reading ‘Clark Matthews Goes Medieval On Your Ass’

Category: Medieval Fair of Norman and Ogle Embed. 10 Comments

Ogle Embed: Jury Duty (Part II)

Published by
Clark Matthews
 on November 14, 2007

 

If you missed Part I, you are severely lacking in knowledge of the Juror Orientation process in federal district court.  It’s up to you to decide whether that is something you need in order to become a well rounded person.  We left off with me being sent to the Juror Assembly Room….

(Note:  Because much of this section had to be done from memory–I couldn’t take notes inconspicuously during the Voir Dire process–I am ditching the time designations)

 ———————-

JUROR ASSEMBLY ROOM

  • The assembly room is slightlymore comfortable than the court room I just left.  That isn’t saying much considering the orientation court room was stocked with uncushioned wooden pews.  There is a sofa near the entrance, and while there was space for me to post up there, I knew that sitting there would have meant having someone else sitting right next to me…and that would have been a bit too cozy.  I find a seat in an ordinary waiting room chair.
  • There are about half a dozen plasma screen televisions attached to the ceiling and spread out throughout the room.  I am willing to bet everything in my pocket, including my wife’s hot pink cell phone, that those will all be tuned to Fox News within the hour.
  • There is a piano in one corner of the room with puzzles stacked on top of it…does the Juror Assembly Room double as a Senior Citizen’s Center?
  • The first call for a juror pool comes
    • I am not on the list
  • Call number two comes…the deputy doing the calling is the smug deputy from Judge Val’s courtroom
    • A lady corrects the deputy who calls her name, and this time I understand.  Her last name?  Fuchs.  It’s pronounced Fyooks.
    • No luck…more waiting for Clark
  • Third time is the charm
    • Along with myself, the random sampling also includes the guy with the Abe Lincoln beard, the guy who looks like a member of Z.Z. Top, the guy with all the facial piercings, and the lady who is dressed like a witch…if the guy who tried to convince the judge he was retarded had been in this group, every person I recognized during the orientation would be in this group.  It’s shaping up like one of those camp movies where the main character meets everyone he will come into contact with in the opening scene.
  • On the elevator ride up to the courtroom, I get stuck standing between Abe and Z.Z.  They smell like a hybrid of old milk and rotten hot dogs.  Both are sweating profusely after our walk of approximately twenty yards. Continue reading ‘Ogle Embed: Jury Duty (Part II)’

Category: Jim Traber and Ogle Embed. 4 Comments

Ogle Embedded: Jury Duty (Part I)

Published by
Clark Matthews
 on November 9, 2007

 

The dreaded summons came to my home.  Sure, it isn’t quite as bad as the kind of summons that says you are being sued, but jury duty still sucks.  I know because this is my second time to be called even though I still haven’t hit thirty.  (And yes, I’m tired of senior citizens marvelling, “You’ve been called twice?  I’ve never been called for jury duty.”  Bite me, Grandma.)

Having done a stint at the county courthouse when I was a young pup of eighteen, when I at least had my college text books to study, I knew I was in for hours and hours of boredom.  So, when I showed up at the Federal Courthouse, I came up with a plan to fight the tedium:  share my experience with you, TheLostOgle reader. Continue reading ‘Ogle Embedded: Jury Duty (Part I)’

Category: Ogle Embed. 8 Comments