Well, readers, we are way into the Thunder season, and there’s something that has been weighing pretty heavily on my heart. Every time there’s a game I find myself at a sports bar imbibing heavily and eating my body weight in cheese fries dipped in ranch dressing. And in order to support my boys, I feel it necessary to order whatever Thunder-themed drink is on the menu. Unfortunately, every stinking bar in the OKC Metro area does this awful thing where they put blue curacao in the drink to mimic that Thunder blue.
This is problematic for a number of reasons. Blue curacao is gross, it eats away at the lining of my stomach and gives me heartburn, and it’s fruity and lame which does nothing to highlight the athleticism and masculinity of our team. Bartenders, hear my cry! The Thunder is the one thing that brings us all together. Where college football tears us apart, basketball makes us one. And it’s a damn shame that the bars are serving the jankiest swill under the guise of team spirit that does nothing to honor the great men that represent our city on the court.
So, I’ve made a list of beverages that do not contain blue curacao. Take note, city bartenders.
My mom likes to call Thabo “Swiss Chocolate.” Sefolosha may be number 2 on the court, but this drink will be number 1 to your taste buds. Mix one part vanilla ice cream, one part Frangelico, and one part of your favorite Swiss chocolate almond liquer. Blend until smooth. Serve in a parfait glass.
Well, I guess it’s time to give our now annual list of bold predictions for the new year. This time around we have a list of 24 predictions as opposed to the usual 20. Why is that? I honestly have no clue. I guess we’re bettering our chances of getting some of them correct.
Anyway, we’ll post 12 predictions today and 12 more tomorrow. Here we go.
TO THINK IS EASY. TO ACT IS DIFFICULT… TO ACT AS ONE THINKS IS THE MOST DIFFICULT OF ALL. #BEWISE
— Hasheem Thabeet (@HasheemTheDream) December 31, 2012
GOD DOESN’T GIVE U WHAT U WANT..BU HE SURE WILL DELIVER WHAT U NEED. #HAVEFAITH
— Hasheem Thabeet (@HasheemTheDream) December 29, 2012
BEAUTY FADES.. DUMB IS FOREVER.
— Hasheem Thabeet (@HasheemTheDream) December 13, 2012
1. Kevin Durant informs Hasheem Thabeet about the caps lock button on his iPhone.
2. Sweet Brown arrested for arson.
Hello all! It’s 2013, and outside of one team from L.A., the Thunder continue to dominate the NBA landscape. Since it’s a new year, it seems like high time we make a resolutions list, highlighting what I’d like to see out of the Thunder as we continue this fantastic season. I know that the Thunder are 24-6 right now, so it’s hard to complain about anything that’s happened so far. But when you get right down to it, that’s what New Year’s Resolutions are. Complaints about silly things like being overweight and or drinking too much Diet Dr Pepper.
So I’ve got a list of resolutions the team may want to consider.
1. Throw T-Shirts in different places. Is it just me, or do the same people get T-Shirts every single game? They have this Balon Blaster that shoots T-Shirts at exactly the same distance every time, resulting in exactly the same folks getting shirts every time. I’m betting if you sat in a good strategic position, you could get a free shirt at least every other night. There’s also this rubber band thing that shoots into the 300 level, but it always seems to land in the first row. Put it this way: I’ve sat in the same seat since opening night in ’08, and I haven’t gotten a free non-playoff shirt since 2009 or so. I want a free T-Shirt! Just once!
After another fantastic week of Thunder basketball, the team has amassed a 11 game win streak. It’s nothing remarkable in the scope of the NBA, with 10+ game win streaks happening virtually every year. But it’s easy for the mind of the passionate fan to race. What if the Thunder could win 34 straight games and beat one of the NBA’s longest-standing records?
In order to find out, it’s best to go straight to the source. The 1971-72 Los Angeles Lakers, who won 33 straight games. Before the streak, the Lakers weren’t a particularly heralded team. They were full of household names that you might know, like Wilt Chamberlain, Jerry West, and Gail Goodrich. But despite their talents, they were the Buffalo Bills of the NBA. Throughout the 60s, they got continually beaten in the NBA Finals by Bill Russell’s Celtics, and hadn’t won a championship since the franchise was in Minneapolis.
Going into the 71-72 season, it looked like the Lakers were about to let their dynasty fall. The year prior saw injuries to both Elgin Baylor and Wilt Chamberlain, leading to a first round playoff loss. Most of their stars were old, and no new players had come on to the scene.
But something was different this year. The Lakers got a new head coach in Bill Sharman, who had previously been a part of the Celtics teams that continually whipped Laker tail. He brought in a new philosophy to Los Angeles, using the up-tempo offense he had learned in Boston. You see, basketball was a very different game back then. There was no three-point line, and the general philosophy was that the center touched the ball at least once before the team ever took a shot. The 24-second shot clock had just been invented, and most teams thought that they should use all the time they could in order to get a good look, rather than taking the first opportunity that came up. In other words, imagine if the Thunder made sure Kendrick Perkins got the ball in the post during every possession, and Russell Westbrook slowed down fast breaks so he could set up the offense.
Last night, while watching the Thunder stumble their way to a sloppy victory over the Hornets, I grabbed my phone to see what people were saying on Twitter. Of course, the first thing I saw was this terrible tweet from Jenni Carlson:
Remember, #Thunder fans, this same Hornets team lost last night to the Wizards. The Wizards!
— Jenni Carlson (@JenniCarlson_OK) December 13, 2012
Yes, the Hornets lost to the Wizards. The Wizards! Know what other team has lost to the Wizards? The Miami Heat. Yes, the Heat! Maybe this is a newsflash to Jenni, but NBA teams have professional athletes and play 82 games, therefore random upsets and trailing a bad squad early in the first quarter of a game isn’t all that unusual. That’s why the tweet was stupid. She made it seem like a big deal and that Thunder fans should worry and panic. Naturally, she followed the Tweet with this:
#Thunder showing a little spark. Down 36-32 with 2:35 left in the first half.
— Jenni Carlson (@JenniCarlson_OK) December 13, 2012
Once again, that’s why her original tweet was so stupid. The Hornets did lose to the Wizards. They’re a bad team and bad teams tend to blow leads and lose winnable games. That’s why Thunder fans didn’t care they were losing to a team that lost to the Wizards.
So I replied to her tweet with this:
Thanks! Your message has been sent!