Oklahoma City News, Entertainment & Occasional Humor • Established 2007

Archive for Oklahoma Politics – Page 14

Dog the Bounty Hunter is attending a campaign fundraiser for the Fetus Food lawmaker…

dog david holt

Last year, Dog the Bounty Hunter and his wife Hulk Hogan made a much publicized visit to the Oklahoma State Capitol to pitch new laws and regulations designed to protect Oklahomans from poorly trained, thrill-seeking, only-in-it-for-the-attention bounty hunters like Dog the Bounty Hunter. Nothing ironic with that. Maybe next session we can bring out the Duck Dynasty gang to talk about hunting safety, racism or the hazards of beard ticks.

Dog was a popular man during his trip and felt right at home being surrounded by his target demographic of low IQ irrational simpletons. Just about every lawmaker, staffer and 10 Commandments Monument installer lined up to get their picture made with the celeb. My favorite was the one above where Dog appears to give State Senator David Holt, leader of the Senate Goober Caucus, a move called “The Tickler.”

If you missed your chance to meet Dog, don’t cry you like you’ve been cuffed and sprayed in the face with pepper spray. You’ll have another chance to make your friends from Meeker and Chickasha jealous.

Yesterday, it was announced that Dog and his wife will headline a fundraiser for State Senator Ralph Shortey on October 2. You may remember Ralph. He’s the mouth breather who introduced totally serious legislation in 2012 that would have prevented aborted fetuses from being sold as food in Oklahoma grocery stores. He also once killed a mad turkey… with a club.

Here’s a pic of Ralph from an Oklahoman article to help refresh your memory. I’ve also included a few more a details about the fundraiser:

Josh Brecheen has released a “FUNNY” campaign video

josh brecheen crop

It’s been awhile since we’ve written about Oklahoma State Senator Josh Brecheen (pictured above). Fortunately, his campaign released a video back in August to let us know the Durant lawmaker and leader of the Derplahoman caucus is alive and well.

Here’s a description of the video via YouTube:

Please WATCH and share this FUNNY video of Josh, family, and friends announcing the kickoff event…

This fun, upbeat, outdoor event will be open to the public and will have free sub sandwiches, ice tea, BIG bounce houses for the kids, music and more, and will be attended by friends, family, district supporters, Senate President Pro Tempore Brian Bingman, State Auditor Gary Jones, Labor Commissioner Mark Costello, members of the Oklahoma legislature…and hopefully you if you can make it!

So, it’s a FUNNY video? That’s cool. I wonder if he shares with us his 19th century thoughts on evolution, or reminds us of how hard he fought to protect the rights of puppy mill owners? All of those things are hysterical in their own sad and depressing way.

Let’s check out the FUNNY video:

State Rep John Bennett is a racist, Islamophobic, derplahoman tool head…

john bennett

The wee little lad pictured to the far right in the photo above is State Rep John Bennett. He’s one of the extreme whackos in our Oklahoma legislature, and not surprisingly, suffers a bit from little man syndrome when it comes to Muslims (a.k.a. people who are different than him).

Earlier this week, John made some news when he posted on Facebook that we should all be wary of the “individuals” who call themselves “Muslim Americans.” Apparently, this is because the 2.7-million Muslim Americans living in our country apparently want to kill all the Christians and other non-believers.

From John Bennett’s now very private Facebook Page:

john bennett crazy facebok post

Yes, if someone is a Muslim they subscribe to the Koran and want to kill all non-Muslims, you know, just like how all Christians like John Bennett who subscribe to the Bible want to kill all non-believers, women who are not virgins on their wedding night and blasphemers. That’s how it works, right?

The answer is “No, of course not.” As we all know, most Muslims and most Christians don’t want to kill non-believers, heretics, etc., but there are extreme, vocal, psychotic factions on both sides that do, and of course, these people get all the attention and run for public office and get elected and all that crazy stuff.

The fact that John Bennett posted such a crazy comment shouldn’t be too big of surprise. As the false prophet Yoda would say, strong is the crazy with this one.

Last year, John created the Oklahoma counter-terrorism caucus in the Oklahoma legislature. The purpose of the fear mongering group was to educate and inform Oklahomans about the growing Muslim threat, and prevent the Muslim Brotherhood from “establishing world-wide rule” and “imposing Shariah law” across our state. So far, the caucus has done a great job at accomplishing its goals. Since its inception, judges handing out punishments such as lashes for adultery and amputated limbs for theft have remained at their historic lows of zero, while the acceptance of negative stereotypes towards Muslim Americans and a general Islamophobia in our state continues to rise.

But if you really want to see some crazy in action, check out some other things John has posted on his Facebook timeline. It looks like something you’d see while eating a burger at Little Mike’s during Ramadan. Just about every post spreads misinformation and lies about Obama, muslims, Democrats–you name it. His dedication to being a right-wing whacko is so high that it makes your reclusive uncle jealous.

Once again, the page is private, but here are some screen shots:

It still sucks to be a gay person living in Oklahoma…

lesbian divorce

Remember back in June when we told you about that wannabe politician from Moore who wants to ban divorce and thinks it’s okay for the state to stone homosexuals to death?

Well, his name is Scott Esk and his head is about to explode right now.

Yesterday, The Oklahoman’s Nolan Clay took a quick break from investigating lap dances (actually, he didn’t) to let us know that a flip-flopping judge vacated a lesbian couple’s divorce decree just a day after approving it because Oklahoma laws do not recognize gay marriage. I would come up with a silly analogy to point out how ridiculous that is, but it’s the Tuesday after a Labor Day weekend, my brain is fried and I don’t think such an analogy doesn’t exists.

Via NewsOK.com:

TLO Endorsement: Steve Russell for 5th Congressional District

steve russell

Back in June, we endorsed Christian theocrat Harvey Sparks as the Republican candidate for the Oklahoma 5th Congressional District. We did this because I played on his church basketball league my sophomore year of high school. That worked out about as well as a pack of wet matches. He finished last.

Hopefully we’ll have better luck this time around. We’re endorsing Steve Russell over Patrice Douglas in today’s Republican runoff for the 5th Congressional seat. This was a difficult decision. They’re both awful choices, but since men are generally taller and have higher IQs than women, he’s the logical choice.

Okay, I’m just kidding angry lady who’s about to leave a comment on our Facebook page. There are actually some compelling reasons in addition to height and IQ that led us to endorse this certified gun nut over the certified chamber robot.

Here are three of them: