Mary Fallin is on the move. Joe Dorman is on his way to the movies.
With only three months or so until the November election, Mary Fallin and Joe Dorman are starting to rev up their campaigns. I witnessed this first hand on Tuesday night when I spotted this monstrosity barreling down the highway:
I know you shouldn’t text or take photos and drive, but remember, it’s totally legal to do that in Oklahoma. Plus, there wasn’t a lot of traffic and I was already in the middle of attacking a village in Clash of Clans so I had my phone handy. Trust me, it was perfectly safe.
Anyway, that’s Mary Fallin’s new campaign bus. Apparently, it’s called “Mary on the Move,” which is what her bodyguards usually yell after the Governor’s had dinner at Ted’s. Seriously, was that the best name they could come up? It sounds like it would be a better fit for a Mary Fallin porn parody. We should have a contest to come up with a nickname for it. Off the top of my head, some suggestions are the Derpmobile, Moto Grotto or the Bean Feeder.
Speaking of contests, while Mary is crisscrossing the state attending bean feeds and distancing herself from groups that want to have some fellowship and talk about the Klu Klux Klan, her Democratic opponent Joe Dorman is hard at work campaigning, too. Last week, he called-in to an Oklahoma radio station in hopes of winning free movie tickets:
Earlier today, several Ogle Moles sent me the following flyer that promotes a GOP Bean Feed featuring Governor Mary Fallin. The event is to take place Saturday, August 23rd at the Garvin County Fair Building.
Here’s the flyer:
That’s pretty funny. Since Oklahoma Republicans are some of the most boring people on the planet and don’t have to worry about stinking up an after party, I can totally see them getting together to eat beans and talk about the NRA, Planned Parenthood and… Ku Klux Klan?
Yeah, once I read that bit in the final bullet point, my B.S. meter went into full alert. I know there are a bunch of racist, rural Republicans in our state, but usually they do a better job of hiding it. So, I emailed Alex Weintz, Mary Fallin’s Communications Director, and asked:
“Question: Is your boss speaking at a GOP Bean Feed on Saturday, August 23rd?”
The was his reply: “No.”
So, according to her office, Governor Mary Fallin will not be stuffing her face with pinto beans at the Garvin County GOP Bean Feed. Please don’t tell that to the Oklahoma Democratic Party. They took this apparent prank-bait hook, line and sinker, and issued this press release:
Other than Sally Kern’s proposed bill that would have made it legal for a third grader to chew a chicken finger into a play gun and then shoot it at teachers, it was a relatively quiet legislative session for the gun nuts in the Oklahoma legislature.
Well, it looks like those good times are ending with a bang. According to The Oklahoman, the wackos who get a hard-on when they see a magazine clip are going to push the issue of allowing guns on college campuses during the 2015 legislative session. Because you know, that will keep our campuses safe.
Last Friday, NBC’s Chuck Todd named four “Rising Stars” in Oklahoma politics on his weekday MSNBC talk show “The Daily Rundown.” It’s part of his “TDR50″ initiative, which names four up and coming young politicians from each state.
The list for Oklahoma includes two Democrats and two Republicans. I guess that means Chuck’s research interns have a sense of humor. You’re more likely to find Bigfoot in Idabel than a rising Oklahoma Democrat.
Here’s the clip and a brief breakdown of who was honored:
So you’re saying there’s a chance.
On Friday, Rasmussen released shocking poll results that show the 2014 Oklahoma Gubernatorial race is lot closer than anyone actually thought. How close? Mary Fallin only leads Joe Dorman by a 45% – 40% margin.
Yes, that’s only 5%. I guess blocking affordable healthcare for poor people, giving tax cuts to the 1%, allowing horse slaughter, denying access to public records, coming out against tornado shelters in schools, traveling across the world on the state’s dime, flunking third graders, discriminating against homosexuals, and naming her dog Okie and not Trooper has taken its toll on Mary Fallin’s popularity.
Via Rasmussen Reports:
Thanks! Your message has been sent!