Let’s hope the devil’s monument engraver uses spellcheck.
Earlier this week, The Satanic Temple offered to build and fund a monument at the Oklahoma State Capitol honoring Satan. Their proposal, which was submitted to the Capitol Preservation Commission, comes nearly a year after a monument displaying the 10 Commandments was installed on the north steps of the capitol.
From a Satanic Temple press release:
Congrats gays and lesbians who serve our country! It looks like Mary Fallin is also a flip-flopper.
Last week, while you were engaged in traditional gluttony and consumerism, Mary Fallin quietly decided that our state will comply with federal law and begin to process benefit requests for same-sex spouses of national guardsmen
Because it was sheepishly announced on Thanksgiving Eve, the decision received hardly any local media attention or coverage. In fact, I think the New York Times is the only place to cover it, and even they only gave it a small paragraph:
I guess it’s time for Christina Fallin’s straight friends to write an angry letter to Governor Mary Fallin, too.
If you remember correctly, our State’s Chief Executive Derplahoman announced back in September that the Oklahoma National Guard will no longer process benefit requests for same-sex couples. She made the decision because the will of the Oklahoma people is to apparently defy federal law and treat homosexual servicemen and women who are willing to serve and protect this country as second-class citizens.
Well, now she’s taking things to a whole new crazy and embarrassing Sally Kernesque level. Check out this Randy Krehbiel story that published a few weeks ago in The Tulsa World. Governor Mary has instructed state-owned National Guard facilities to stop processing benefit requests for everyone:
Oklahoma will stop processing all military spouse benefit applications at state-owned National Guard facilities rather than begin accepting the applications from same-sex spouses, Gov. Mary Fallin said Wednesday.
Instead, military spouse applications, including those of same-sex couples, will only be accepted at four federally owned National Guard bases: the Air National Guard bases in Tulsa and Oklahoma City, the Regional Training Institute in Oklahoma City and Camp Gruber.
The applications are already being processed at the state’s five U.S. military installations: Fort Sill, Tinker Air Force Base, Altus Air Force Base, Enid Air Force Base and the McAlester ammunition plant.
The Fallin administration’s decision appears to be in defiance of Defense Secretary Chuck Hagel’s directive to process the applications of all spouses, regardless of sex, although Fallin maintained her solution complies with all “federal rules or policies.”
Fallin said the decision was reached in consultation with Attorney General Scott Pruitt.
“Oklahoma law is clear,” Fallin said in a statement.
“The state of Oklahoma does not recognize same-sex marriages, nor does it confer marriage benefits to same-sex couples. The decision reached today allows the National Guard to obey Oklahoma law without violating federal rules or policies. It protects the integrity of our state constitution and sends a message to the federal government that they cannot simply ignore our laws or the will of the people.”
Although Oklahoma owns most of the state’s National Guard armories and training centers, the facilities were built almost entirely with federal funds.
The federal government provides about 90 percent of the budget for the Oklahoma Military Department, which includes the National Guard.
I don’t know how or why, but I totally missed this article when it was released a few weeks ago. I guess I just assumed it was a regurgitation of the original story, or maybe my body is building up an immunity to the words and policies of nutty Oklahoma politicians. We should get OMRF to research a Derplahoman vaccine or something.
Fortunately, the national media recently picked up on the news and has exposed the Governor for being a backwards thinking, illogical, misguided bigot. My favorite article/column was written by Mark Joseph Stern over at Slate.
Here’s a snippet:
The piece of cheesy, trying-too-hard happiness pictured above is Deby Snodgrass. When she’s not pretending to be a realtor with lipstick on her teeth, she’s the Executive Director of the Oklahoma Tourism and Recreation Department.
Deby made the news recently for receiving a $40,000 (46%) pay raise that bumped her annual salary to $126,000. The raise generated some controversy because a) most state employees haven’t received pay raises since 2006, b) it was a $40,000 raise, c) it was a $40,000 raise, and d) it was a $40,000 raise. Did I mention it was a $40,000 raise? I would make an off-color “Who’d she have to _______ for that” joke, but it would be too unrealistic. Other than blackmailing your boss, having powerful friends in high places, or lying on your online dating profile, there’s nothing you can do to earn a raise like that.
Snodgrass has obviously received a lot of criticism and unwanted media attention for the hefty pay increase. Therefore, it’s not too surprising that the Tourism Department recently issued a press release that touts the economic impact tourism has on Oklahoma. The release lacks substance and fails to put random numbers into a meaningful perspective, but it sure draws attention away from a goddamn $40,000 a year raise. The goldfish pool that is our local media took the bait.
Here in a few weeks, the Oklahoma City Theatre Company will perform a satirical, homosexual-themed play called “The Most Fabulous Story Ever Told.” The play makes fun of religion, the bible, and would probably be a hit on Bravo:
Seeking a theatrical offering for the holidays that challenges the norm and appeals to an alternative audience, OKCTC presents this rib-tickling satirical take on selected stories from the Bible. Act 1 is a retelling of the major episodes of the Old Testament and the Nativity story. Act 2 jumps to modern day where Adam and Steve (who met in Eden, broke up during the flood, and were reunited when they both show up as shepherds during the Nativity) are together again. Bound by their long life together, the two men comfort each other even though their remaining time will be short. A hilarious comedy with a surprisingly dramatic heart.
Naturally, the production has irked the Derplahoman army. One of their alpha leaders, Sally Kern’s husband Rev. Steve Kern (pictured above), is planning a prayer gathering in protest.
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