I love Oklahoma, so it upsets me when we are beaten in polls by states like Mississippi or West Virginia.
Last week, Oklahoma was ranked as “The 9th Most Miserable State” in a national well-being / link-baiting index. USAToday.com:
> Well-being index score: 64.7
> Life expectancy: 75.9 years (5th lowest)
> Percent obese: 30.5% (10th highest)
> Median household income: $44,312 (10th lowest)
> Percent with high school diploma: 86.7% (19th lowest)
Oklahomans had among the most unhealthy behaviors in the U.S. during 2013. Only about half of the population said they ate fruits and vegetables on a regular basis last year, less than any other state. Oklahoma residents also reported poor access to basic necessities. More than 10% of residents said they did not have easy access to clean and safe drinking water, worse than any other state. Oklahomans also self-reported poor physical health. More than 6% of adults said they have had a heart attack as of last year, more than in any other state, and considerably higher than the national average of 3.8%. In 2010, there were 235.2 heart disease-related deaths per 100,000 residents, the third-highest rate nationwide.
10% of our residents don’t have access to clean and safe drinking water? That’s puzzling. Also, 6% of adults claimed they had a heart attack last year? Doesn’t that seem high? But don’t worry. These problems can all be fixed. All we need to do is give a tax break to the rich. Then everything will figure its way out.
Actually, it’s not the easy. In fact, improving our state is pretty damn hard. Since we’ll never do anything to combat these problems, I think we should go all out and try to be the most miserable state in the country. It shouldn’t be too hard to accomplish. Plus, we’ll finally be number one at something.
Here are some tips how:
Wind farms are an eyesore. When I drive past the wind farms in Western Oklahoma, they fill me with rage. Why can’t wind farms be as calming and peaceful as an abandoned oil well or pump jack?
Luckily Senate Pro Tempore Brian Bingman feels the same way I do. He’s leading legislation to block them from being built anywhere to the east of I-35.
Growing up in Shawnee, I can remember being in first or second grade and reciting the Pledge of Allegiance in class. At the time, I didn’t know or care about what the Pledge meant. I’m still not sure I get it. I don’t really think pledges matter, just ask PBS. They’ll tell you mine are worthless.
Anyway, there are two bills going through the Oklahoma Legislature that will require the Pledge of Allegiance to be recited in all schools across the state. From KFOR.com:
A pair of proposed bills that are heading to the Oklahoma Senate have some concerned about freedom of speech or freedom of religion.
Senate Bill 1143 would require the Pledge of Allegiance be recited each day in public elementary schools.
The bill says it other public schools will have the choice of whether to say the pledge or not.
Uhhh… listen, TLO is full of typos and grammatical errors, but that last sentence(?) was copied from KFOR. We expect better out of people who get paid.
Back to the story.
However, it adds that students who do not want to participate in the pledge should not be required to do so.
While that bill is geared toward elementary schools, another very similar bill has a much wider focus.
Senate Bill 1500 says the Pledge of Allegiance will be said each day in all public schools during each school day.
It also adds that students not wishing to participate will not be required to recite the pledge.
If passed, the requirements would go into effect on July 1.
So far, both bills have passed the Senate Education Committee and are now scheduled for a hearing before the full Senate.
So the bills “require” schools to conduct a Pledge of Allegiance, but doesn’t require students to recite it? No peer pressure there. Also, how are we going to brainwash our children if they aren’t require to blindly say words they probably don’t comprehend?
Personally, I think these bills are a waste of time. You’re not going to make students love America more by having them say the Pledge. For that to work, you’ll need to have our students say other pledges, too. For example:
Kendrick Perkins has been taking a lot of flack recently. Apparently Jim Traber, Thunder fans and everyone else doesn’t like him and think he’s underperforming. I’m here to say, “Sure, he might be underperforming. Sure, from a statistical point of view the Thunder are better with him on the bench.” But guess what, there are worse things in Oklahoma than Kendrick Perkins touching a basketball. In fact, Patrick and I were able to rack our brains and come up with 10 of them.
10. Being cut off in traffic by a car with a LifeChurch.tv bumpersticker
What is the best way to show people you’re a Christian? Is it by donating your time to the needy? Giving away all your possessions and following the word of God? Nope, apparently it’s slapping a LifeChurch sticker on the back of your Range Rover and driving like a maniac.
LifeChurch, it’s cheaper than eHarmoney if you don’t tithe!
9. Travis Ford’s Coaching Ability
Saying the guy is in over his head is rude because he’s so short, but it’s the truth. Travis Ford is a good recruiter, but he’s consistently out-coached and his teams never live up to their talent. You can tell that he’s doing a bad job when OSU fans hate him and OU fans love him.
I’ll be the first to say that life isn’t fair. The rich get richer, the poor get poorer, and some dudes get to go on dates with porn stars because they made mildly amusing signs.
In case you missed it, some OSU student named Matt McGann accompanied adult film superstar Lisa Ann to the AVN awards in Las Vegas. That’s the pic of them above. The reason? He held up a sign during Gameday’s visit to the OSU – Baylor Game that read “Baylor’s defense has more holes to fill than Lisa Ann.”
Here’s a pic of the sign:
Thanks! Your message has been sent!