Archive for the ‘Tulsa’ Category

Top 15 Names for the Tulsa WNBA Team…

Wednesday, November 11th, 2009

wnba-girlfight

A few weeks back, it was announced that the WBNA’s Detroit Shock was relocating to Tulsa.  Here’s what the Irritated Tulsan wrote here when the news was announced:

It’s Official. Former TU men’s basketball coach Nolan Richardson has been named the coach and general manager of the Detroit Shock.  Tulsa is now home to their very own WNBA team. Tens of people in Detroit are distraught over the news.

Take that OKC Thunder!

While I’m not a sports fanatic, I was excited when my friend Juan told me WNBA stood for Women’s Naughty Basketball Association.  Turned out to be mistranslation.

Attendance for the WNBA is about 8,000 per game.  The BOK Center seats nearly 20,000.  Will this be a boon for Tulsa?  Probably not.  However, what the hell do I know?  I don’t watch sports.  I take pictures of QuikTrip food and make lists about Tulsa’s Sleaziest Shopping Centers.  This is Clark’s area.  All I know is if the OKC Thunder played Tulsa Shock, I’d attend that game.

I’m still not sure how The Irritated Tulsan feels about the WNBA, but I can tell you this: The WNBA SUCKS.  It’s nothing but  a terrible display of basketball filled with missed lay-ups, turnovers and knee braces.  Seriously, I’d rather watch Jenni Carlson eat a Popsicle at Club Rodeo than watch a WNBA game.  It really is that bad!

All that being said, we have decided to help the owners of Tulsa’s new team come up with a new nickname that’s better than Shock.  We’ve listed the Top 15.  If they are smart the owners would use one, but then again, they just bought a WNBA team and moved it to Tulsa!  Nothing’s smart about that.

Anyway, the first couple are available below. The rest are after the jump.

indigogirls

15. Indigo Girls

Yeah, the Indigo Girls really have nothing to do with the NBA, but who cares!  When I think of blatantly lesbian sports leagues, I think of the WBNA.  When I think of blatantly lesbian folk rock bands, I think of the Indigo Girls.

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mayor cornett thunder

14. Oklahoma Citians

Recently, it seems like Tulsa has been on a mission to try to one up Oklahoma City.  We get Bricktown and the Ford Center and they build the BOK and do fancy stuff to a river.  We get Sally Kern, they trot out Randy Brogdon.  We get the NBA, and all of a sudden they are in the “big leagues” and score a WBNA team.  Since Tulsa wants to be like Oklahoma City so badly, calling the team the Oklahoma Citians makes sense.

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Posted in Sports, Tulsa | 15 Comments »

ONEOK isn’t very smart…

Thursday, September 17th, 2009

naturalgas

Yesterday, that Tulsa World reported that ONEOK — the company who has a monopoly on natural gas service in Oklahoma — had filed a lawsuit against Twitter because some scoundrel had created a phony ONEOK Twitter account. Just a few hours later, ONEOK dropped the lawsuit:

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Posted in Tulsa, Tulsa World, twitter | 7 Comments »

Memo: Demonstration Sports for the 2020 Olympiad

Thursday, August 6th, 2009

tulsa2020

To: The Tulsa/Bentonville Olympic Organizing Committee
From: The Lost Ogle
Re: Demonstration Sports for the 2020 Tulsa Olympiad

We wish to commend the bright minds and organizers who will lead the efforts to bring the Olympic Games to Tulsa and Bentonville. Inspired by Atlanta’s 1996 bid, they have sailed on the reed of “Tulsa has the same number of people as Atlanta,” which is a fine argument. If you ignore the 2 million people who were living in Atlanta’s suburbs in 1989, the presence of three major league teams, the busiest airport in the world, an international network, and the headquarters of ten of the world’s 100 largest corporations including Delta, Coke,  and RJR, yeah, Tulsa is just like Atlanta.

But, Atlanta is a model for any city more concerned with self-promotion than quality of life, so Tulsa has chosen wisely. Besides, Atlanta should want to help, because a Tulsa Olympics will burnish the image of Atlanta as a sophisticated and cosmopolitan place rather than a collection of Johnny Knoxvilles who drive flying ‘69 Dodge Chargers.

Now, there is much work to be done – building venues; getting direct airline service to someplace besides Dallas, Atlanta, or Chicago; lowering the summer temperature in Tulsa by 26 degrees; making 2 million people move to Jenks; just to name a few. We here at TLO want to do our part.

At every Olympiad, the host nation is allowed to include certain “demonstration” sports in which nations might compete. In some instances (i.e. baseball) the demonstration sport goes on to become a permanent Olympic event. In our effort to fully enhance the bid of Green Country to host the summer Olympics, we, The Lost Ogles, hereby advance and suggest the following demonstrations sports for the 32d Olympiad:

Noodling. Nothing says Oklahoma like sticking your arm down in the murky waters of an east Oklahoma river or creek and trying to catch a catfish by sticking your arm down its gullet.  Check out this video and you’ll see all the explanation you need for why this is not only an Olympic-worthy sport, but also an Ogle-worthy sport:

YouTube Preview Image

Redneck Biathlon. This is a team event. Every team consists of three guys and a pickup truck. The driver has to drive down US 69 without any brakes, while the passenger next to him opens bottles of beer for the driver, himself, and the third guy in back. The guy in back has a high-powered rifle, and has to shoot at highway signs while the passenger and driver chuck the empties the opposing teams. Last team rolling wins.

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Posted in Tulsa, Unusual | 4 Comments »

This makes “Core to Shore” look like the best idea ever…

Wednesday, August 5th, 2009

olympics

Usually, we let the Irritated Tulsan stick with covering the happenings from the city just up the Turner Turnpike, but this is just too good to pass up.  From the Tulsa World:

The Tulsa 2020 Committee on Tuesday presented the City Council with the idea of the city making a bid to host the 2020 summer Olympic games.

Seriously.

“A lot of you are probably thinking what I thought the first time I heard this, ‘Tulsa? Olympics? Are you out of your mind?’?” said committee member Michael Jones, an attorney.

“That’s exactly what everyone said about Atlanta when they started proposing the same thing,” he said.

Atlanta was awarded the 1996 summer games.

Much of the committee’s presentation centered on the similarities between Tulsa now and Atlanta in 1989 and 1990, when it was making its bid.

Committee member Neil Mavis, an expense reduction analyst, lived in Atlanta at the time it made its bid and began talking to people he knows about Tulsa’s possible shot.

I’ll tell you what, you know your idea is a dumb idea when the newspaper actually covers it, but then proceeds to put a “Seriously” after the first paragraph just to let the readers know its okay to laugh.

If the people behind this movement are even remotely serious, they should be abandoned in Picher.  Tulsa’s lucky to host an Ogle Madness Regional or the Sooner State Games, much less the world’s premier event.  Hell, most people around the country think it’s odd that the PGA Tour makes so many stops there.  And you can include me in that group.

I love how Michael Jones — the genius behind this idea and a person who may be clinically insane — tries to compare Atlanta to Tulsa.  I visited Atlanta earlier this summer for a mini vacation.  The only similarity I found between the two cities is that they are both inhabited by people.  That’s about it.  In fact, Atlanta was far superior to Tulsa in about every way, shape or form.  There was more stuff to do in the Atlanta airport than there is to do in Tulsa on a Friday night.

Anyway, although the odds of the Olympics coming to Tulsa are about as high as finding Sally Kern dancing in a gay bar, we wish our friends to the north the best of luck in pursuing their Olympic dreams.  We will enjoy laughing at them, too.

Posted in Tulsa, Tulsa World | 10 Comments »