I’m not proud of it, but I occasionally use Wikipedia to research questions for the free team trivia nights we host around town. Sure, Wikipedia isn’t always reliable and can be edited by just about anyone, but for the most part it’s pretty accurate and a good tool. The only catch is that you need to be aware that some of its content is sketchy. Basically, you need to own a good bullshit detector. I use the one someone stole from Gan Matthews before he left Channel 9.
So why am I telling you that?
Yesterday, I was working on trivia and thought it would be fun to ask a question about Kate Upton. You know, something related to the Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue or her perfect breasts or something like that. I went to her Wikipedia page to look up any trivial facts or information and stumbled across this nugget from her career section:
Upton made an appearance in a June 2011 episode of Tosh.0, filmed in Fort Cobb, Oklahoma, participating in a segment called “Knife or Banana”, emulating a Japanese game show in which she is stabbed with a banana.
That turned my bullshit detector on red alert. There’s no way his pair could have filmed a sketch in Oklahoma without us knowing about it. That would have sent the Ogle Mole network into a panic.
Despite my skepticism, I decided to do a little research. First I watched the “Knife or Banana” clip.
Here it is:
Granted, I’m not prepubescent girl or post menopausal woman, but I don’t get American Idol. I watched a couple of seasons back in the dark ages when I was married — or three if you count Rock Star: INXS — and all were torture. I don’t see the joy or pleasure in watching scores of untalented hacks attempt to sing or dance.
Anyway, one of the “highlights” of the American Idol auditions in OKC was ventriloquist Hailie Hilburn and her puppet Oscar. In case you missed it, and let’s hope you did, here’s the clip:
We have some sad and non-shocking news. Hailie and her bizarre outfit didn’t make it past the first round of the Hollywood auditions.
We also have some sadder news. Hailie and her puppet Oscar are trying to get on America’s Got Talent. Here’s Oscar’s new rap video “I’m OzCar.”
Well, readers, I think we can agree on one thing, and that is that high school was awful. If you’re the sort of person who really enjoyed their glory days, screw you. My date to the junior prom left with another girl and I was one of like 7 brown kids in Edmond. You can’t make me relive that crap ever. But for the kids these days, high school is about to get a little bit worse because there’s a Republican state representative who doesn’t really want them to learn anymore.
In the grand tradition of stupid things our elected representatives have proposed, students could very well start making A’s on papers they write about Jesus riding a raptor. From MotherJones.com:
Sheriff Ron Lockhart from Sequoyah County is a fan of The Learning Channel. But not The Learning Channel of yesteryear, when they had programs with educational value. He’s a fan of today’s TLC, the one that has shows about conspiracy theories, Honey Boo Boo and Gypsies. In fact, last year TLC and Long Island Medium won the James Randi Educational Foundation’s annual Pigasus Award, a tongue-in-cheek award for blatant promotion of paranormal or psychic claims.
I mention that because Sheriff Ron Lockhart claims a man died from Spontaneous Human Combustion.
From Tulsa’s 5 News Online:
I’m a sucker for mediocre television. I say “mediocre” because I haven’t stooped to the level of the Bachelor or Real Housewives, but also I haven’t hopped on the Downton Abbey bandwagon, and found Breaking Bad to be a little too uh, frightening for regular consumption. Give me an ensemble cast, some husband-hot dudes, and some quirky and relatable heroines. I’ll even stomach a laugh track and blatant emotional manipulation! My Sundays are always reserved for
nursing hangovers catching up on TV shows, and that crazy love affair I have with my DVR has been the longest and most satisfying relationship of my life thus far.
You remember a few weeks ago, we introduced you to Zoanette Johnson, a Tulsa native who inexplicably made it past the first round of auditions for American Idol in OKC. In case you missed it, here’s her um, audition:
Okay, so these insane auditions aren’t exactly a new concept. I mean, the producers made Season 5 winner Taylor Hicks literally look like he was retarded during his Idol debut! Egregious personal narratives followed by unashamed mockery of people who clearly are mentally handicapped–you know, the actual tragic people–has been Idol’s winning formula for over a decade. Even if we forget the ethics of exploiting the weak for capital gain for a minute, wacky and over-the-top auditions by completely normal people who know how to “play the reality game” is pretty common on shows like this. When we first met Zoanette, I thought her whole shtick was somehow pretty crazy, but also pretty “been there, seen that” at the same time. She kind of reminded me of the friends I met at that drag show brunch they have at the Boom. I thought it was pretty weird that they let her through to Hollywood, but I mean, some people think 2 Broke Girls is funny and it’s been eight years and Ted Mosby still hasn’t found a wife. Stranger things have happened on primetime.
This week they aired the Hollywood audition rounds, and our girl Zoanette was one of the most featured contestants. Maybe it had to do with her wearing bras, Daisy Dukes, and lucite platforms on stage. Perhaps producers thought her commanding presence and colorful personality made for good television. But probably, they just wanted to be able to show this clip to the world:
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