The Lost Ogle


Oklahoma City News, Entertainment & Occasional Humor • Established 2007

People should try legitimate cons every now and then

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Would it surprise any readers to know that I used to dream of a career as a con artist? Sure, I’m not someone you would think of as a grifter, but damn, wouldn’t it be cool to do that for a living? There’s no 401k or profit-sharing, but a life of conning people out of their hard-earned dollars surely has its merits. Or at least it would seem that way from the Hollywood movies that feature such down-on-their-luck antiheroes who cheat others to get ahead.

Anyway, I’m not condoning conning people, but that’s only because someone was caught again doing it. If these con artists can’t do it right, what hope do us novices have? Anyway, according to NewsOK.com:

NORMAN — The Cleveland County Sheriff’s Department on Tuesday warned that a man impersonating a deputy tried to get money from a woman by claiming there was a warrant out for her arrest.

Sheriff’s spokeswoman Meghan McCormick said Tuesday a man claiming to be deputy Chris Noel called the woman and told her to buy a prepaid debit card and give the card to the man or her arrest warrant would be activated and she would be arrested.

“Investigators have confirmed that Deputy Noel has not made any calls of this nature,” Cleveland County Sheriff Joe Lester said in a news release.

McCormick said there have been several similar calls reported in the past three months, though none have involved someone impersonating an actual deputy.

“If you receive a call from this individual, hang up and immediately call the Cleveland County Sheriff’s Office and report it,” Lester said in the release. “Do not send this person money for any reason or meet him in public.”

Anyone with information about the man is asked to call the sheriff’s office at 701-8888.

We will give a The Lost Ogle Trivia pen to the first reader who calls that line and pretends to be Deputy Chris Noel and tells the voice on the other end that they need to get a prepaid debit card so they don’t get arrested. (Actually, we probably won’t give you a pen. You’ll need to steal one from Trivia Night like everyone else.)

But this got me to thinking. There’s gotta be some better scams out there that won’t get someone caught so easily. And, of course, I made a list for you, just in case you dream of a life away from a desk with the rush of criminal activity.

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20 Insane Anti-Muslim Facebook Posts by Derplahomans…

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If you enjoy living in a constant state of irrational fear, hate most things that are different from you, and believe 100% in guilt by association, it’s a great time to live in Oklahoma. You’ll be accepted with open arms. Well, unless you’re a Muslim or a terrorist. Based on what I’ve been hearing and reading in the local media, I think they are the same thing.

In a response to last week’s sickening and widely publicized knife attack at Vaughn’s Foods – and one man’s really poor attempt at humor – a group of eight Christian legislators known as the “Counter Terrorism Caucus” decided to capitalize on the anti-Muslim hysteria gripping our state to inform us that one psycho’s random act of workplace violence was obviously not an isolated event and is part of some vast Muslim conspiracy to kill Jesus loving Americans…

Or something like that.

Via NewsOK.com:

Citing Thursday’s beheading of a Vaughan Foods worker in Moore, eight Oklahoma state representatives issued a joint statement Monday calling for a “public discussion about potential terrorists in our midst and the role that Sharia law plays in their actions.”

“The Feds say this is workplace violence, but people know that’s not true,” the eight House members said of Thursday’s incident in which Alton Nolen, 30, is suspected of beheading Vaughan Foods employee Colleen Hufford, 54, shortly after Nolen was fired.

“Unfortunately, jihadism is no longer confined to foreign soil. We must be alert to it here and take steps to counter the doctrine, institutions and organizations that foster it.”

The statement was issued by a group of state House members who identified themselves as the Counterterrorism Caucus.

Listed as signing off on the statement were Republican state Reps. John Bennett of Sallisaw, Sean Roberts of Hominy, Lewis Moore of Arcadia, Dan Fisher of El Reno, Mike Ritze of Broken Arrow, and Sally Kern, Mike Christian and Mike Reynolds, all of Oklahoma City.

First of all, Sally Kern is slipping. She’s a member of the counter terrorism caucus, but the group doesn’t mention gays and homosexuals one time in their press release. Gays are a bigger threat to society than the jihadists, right? Actually, jihadists and Sally Kern probably share similar views on gays and homosexuals. That’s probably why it was omitted.

Anyway, I don’t really buy all the fear and hate directed towards Muslims. Unfortunately, this is because I’m somewhat of a logical and reasonable human being. Am I aware that there are Muslim extremists living throughout the world that are hell bent on killing people? Yes. Could there be some extremists living in the US plotting attacks? Double sure. Does that mean we should live in a constant state of fear and worry that all Muslims are out to get us? Hell YES. Down with Islam!!! My Country ‘Tis of Thee!!!

Just kidding. I turned into a Derplahoman for a second. I actually don’t hate or fear Muslims. In fact, I think that associating Muslims with a small minority of extremists and murderers is just as bad as linking all Christians to the KKK, Westboro Baptist Church or those creepy ministers you see on the news who are caught molesting children. It would be like assuming that every emo kid in a trench coat is a school shooter, or every black man in a pimped-out Impala is a gang member. It’s fear-based stereotyping and about as cool as buying jeans from Sears.

Of course, that’s just a normal, reasonable, non-fear based view on the subject. In Oklahoma, that means I’m an out of touch, naive “Libtard.” For more mainstream views on the subject that propagate media driven fear and support negative stereotypes, check out some of these comments by Derplahomans. They ran to the Facebook pages of local news channels to share their thoughts on Islam, Muslims and total disregard for the English language.

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You know what’s scary? The guy with the Greek last name who wrote that people should go back to the country they came from wasn’t even the craziest post. Don’t get me wrong, it was close, but they get, uhm, better.

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13 local programs for Griffin’s new KSBI Channel 52…

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Last week, we reported that KSBI Channel 52 cancelled its local programming and fired most of its on-air and production staff. Included in the report, we published some emails that alluded to the station possibly being for sale.

Well, apparently David Griffin read our post, because he announced yesterday that Griffin Communications – the owner of News 9 – is buying the fledgling UHF channel. From an email Griffin sent to staff:

I am pleased to announce we have signed an agreement to buy KSBI from Family Broadcasting Group.

Creating a duopoly in Oklahoma City has long been part of our strategy.  This will be similar to the duopoly we have in Tulsa.  Our plan is to focus on improving KSBI programming while integrating operations into our current structure and facilities.

In addition, this purchase fits perfectly with our corporate strategy of focusing on media within the state of Oklahoma, and it will allow more flexibility for flipping of CBS and syndicated programming during breaking news and severe weather.

The sale is expected to close later this year once we receive final approval from the FCC and we will take over operations at that time.  Tony Welch will lead an integration team that includes representatives from all departments.

If you have any questions, please feel free to reach out to Tony.

David

That’s cool. I sure am glad Mr. Griffin reads this website, otherwise this sale would never have happened and Vince Orza would still be drawing up new programming ideas with crayons on old unused Garfield’s tablecloths. That wouldn’t end well.

Anyway, since Mr. Griffin is looking for new shows, Spencer and I came up with a list of some locally produced programs we’d like to see on the channel they should call Freedom 52. If someone can forward this to Tony Welch, we’d appreciate it.

Here they are:

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1. Win Kelly Ogle’s 2 Cents!

It’ll be like Win Ben Stein’s Money, except you have to guess Kelly’s opinion on such topics as: Vegans, ISIS, and FUPA’s. The winner is awarded $0.02, which after taxes is about $0.01. – Spencer

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joleen chaney joe dorman bobbie miller emily sutton

2. The Lovers Lounge with Playboy Joe Dorman

Looking to impress that single lady at the bar? Want to know the perfect way to talk your girlfriend into a threesome? Are you a lonely fireman who’s feeling a strong disconnect from your fiance? Get answers to those questions and more with Freedom 52′s late night talk show – The Lovers Lounge with Playboy Joe Dorman. Each week, the Playboy politician and a special guest will answer your emails and phone calls by offer dating advice and sexy bedroom tips. It will be sponsored by Patricia’s. – Patrick

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Dean Blevins has some Jimmy’s Egg on his face…

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Dean Blevins should probably stick with percentages and / or hunting down who stole his Smart Ones.

Last week, Dean brought some good news to Sooner fans when he broke the story that Texas Tech transfer QB Baker Mayfield was granted a third year of eligibility by the NCAA and would be able to play immediately for the Sooners, giving the team a starting caliber QB to backup (and push) the oft-injured and occasionally inconsistent Trevor Knight.

Via News 9:

Baker Mayfield finally caught a break. And so did the Oklahoma Sooners.

The talented Texas Tech transfer won his appeal with the NCAA and has been granted a third year of eligibility. Oklahoma finally got good news after striking out with three other potential difference-makers they’d hoped/expected to play this season (Dorial Green-Beckham, Joe Mixon and Frank Shannon will not play this year for various off-the-field reasons).

There is some conversation about Mayfield redshirting this season and then having three years to play — presumably leaving him at least one year with Knight having finished his career. But if Mayfield were eligible, it would be hard to fathom Oklahoma not pulling off the redshirt should Knight be unable to play.

Although Mayfield hasn’t been taking reps with the ones and twos (he and DGB are tearing it up with the scout team), the Texas native is talented and experienced enough to jettison into the back-up role quickly. This doesn’t mean that current back-up Cody Thomas will not have a successful career in Norman. Same with redshirt true freshman Justice Hansen. Both are gifted. But neither is currently what Mayfield is as a proven major conference passer, runner, leader and playmaker.

The NCAA should have given an answer sooner to Mayfield. And the Sooners should have done more to get the transfer rule appeal earlier. Sources confirm the Mayfields were disappointed with the timing of the process.

That’s awesome! You can never have too many good quarterbacks on campus. Of course, it would be more awesome if any of it were true:

Via NewsOK.com:

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Uh oh, Mary Fallin shot hoops with Kevin Durant…

Expect Kevin Durant to leave Oklahoma City when he becomes a free agent.

After he was forced to do this on Friday, I guess we can’t blame him.

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Yes, that’s Kevin Durant giving Mary Fallin some pointers on her jump shot. Hopefully they didn’t end up trading powers like in Thunderstruck. It would be awful to see Mary Fallin become the Thunder’s leading scorer and for Kevin Durant to join the Highway Patrol.

Seriously, that’s just weird. I can’t tell if Mary is about to shoot the ball or lay an egg like she did when she took the oath of office. She was probably trying to do both. On a positive note, at least Toby Rowland wasn’t guarding her:

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The pic of Mary Fallin and KD was taken at the state capitol on Friday as part of the Governor’s “Get Fit Initiative.” It’s a new, just-in-time-for-election-season campaign event aimed at promoting exercise to all the state’s third graders that Mary wanted to flunk last year.

The most troublesome part of the event wasn’t what Kevin Durant was forced to watch, but what he had to say. Check out this video from the Oklahoman’s coverage of the event:

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