So, I went out to run a couple of errands this afternoon. It was nothing too crazy. I had to stop by the bank, pick up lunch and grab a few things from Target. No big deal, right?
Well, apparently it was a super big deal because it was snowing outside. That means the city shuts down, everyone rushes to the grocery store, and seemingly normal people forget how to drive. In Oklahoma, there are three types of winter weather drivers – you have the crazy people who drive too fast, the clueless people who drive too slow, and then the rest of us who simply try to stay alert, alive and dodge everyone else.
Anyway, thanks to three hours I spent out and about today, this is going to be a quick, simple and to the point Hot Girl Friday. The woman pictured above is Kasie Head. She’s a former Oklahoma beauty queen, Deal or No Deal model and long-legged Oscars trophy presenter. She was born near Blackwell, which means she’s probably been hit on by Mark Rodgers once or twice in her life, and is now lives in California married to some dude who is in way better physical, financial and emotional shape than any of you. She’s also our Hot Girl Friday…
Welcome to what will likely become a very regular series on The Lost Ogle. It’s called “Jim Inhofe Is Still An Idiot.” Each time our senile Senator from Tulsa does something stupid or idiotic to embarrass Oklahoma on the national stage, we’ll use this series to tell you about it. Well, at least until we run out of Roman numerals.
In today’s edition, let’s touch base on the scene Jim Inhofe caused yesterday when he brought a snowball into the US Senate chambers to prove once and for all that global warming is a myth perpetuated by 98% of the world’s leading scientists.
Here’s the video:
Pour a little Riesling out for your homegirl…
We have learned via the Ogle Mole Network that KFOR Channel 4 has parted ways with long-time news anchor, reporter and TLO regular Meg Alexander. The move went down yesterday afternoon when, according to sources, KFOR management simply called Meg into the office and told her “they no longer need her services.”
Although some have said the decision has been “a long time coming,” this is surprising news. Meg was a KFOR institution. The Gary Kubiak to Linda Cavanaugh, she had been with KFOR for nearly 18-years, helping the local NBC-affiliate grow from one of the most annoying TV stations in Oklahoma City to THE most annoying TV station in Oklahoma City.
Here’s an email that KFOR News Director Carlton Houston sent to the station’s staff addressing the news:
Growing up, whenever my parents left the house, the first thing I would do is down half a bottle of orange-flavored chewable aspirins, chug a little vanilla extract and then chase my younger brother around the house with a loaded BB gun.
Luckily, somewhere around high school, I went down a different, more positive road—thanks, D.A.R.E.!—putting the BB gun and St. Joseph’s down and picking up the Cure’s Disintegration and a pack of cloves instead.
Maybe that’s why I feel so deeply for Martin Lule Jr. Because, maybe, in an alternate universe, there but for the grace of God go I…
According to NewsOK.com:
Rumor has it that it’s going to snow, ice and rain frozen hell today and into this weekend, or at least that’s the intensity of these rumors. From what I hear, the sun itself will freeze, collapsing onto itself, creating the universe’s first black ice-hole. Be careful, depending on your accent, saying this phrase may cause you to lose your job or be sent to in-school suspension (do schools still do that?).
The only graphic I’ve seen that accurately describes the upcoming frozen disaster is this graph created by Damon Lane and the KOCO weather team.
Oh my goodness, we are done with. You might as well go out to the back yard and begin digging your own graves because one of those four lines is touching the two-inch mark! This is a little disappointing. I thought we were in store for three to four feet of acidic snow that causes small rashes like this.
Don’t get me wrong, two inches of snow is problematic, and good reason to stay in and watch season three of “House of Cards.” Hey, remember that time some guy created a mash-up of “Full House” and “House of Cards” and when interviewed live at the Oscars, Kevin Spacey mentioned he just joked around with John Stamos about it? Yeah, that was pretty cool.
Also, if you have an event that should be mentioned on FNITBT, twitter me at @ArkansasFresh. That’s my rap name.
Here’s your Friday Night in the Big Town.
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