< Editor’s Note: To make this post comply with the high standards of a certain web behemoth’s moralistic ad robots, we’ve edited out certain words and replaced them with other words. I’ll let you figure out what. – Patrick >
I want everyone to know that I will never judge a person as an individual for what they’re interested in when it comes to sexy times. I mean, if I’m being completely honest, there is a special place in my fantasies for Al Pacino circa 1972, as well as Fred Durst circa 1998. And if that Durst affinity is any indicator, I’m no stranger to what can be referred to as “dirty.” So that’s why I feel like I’m the perfect person to tell you about what it is your fellow Okies are searching for when it comes to corn. Now, according to The Daily Dot:
Corn site CornDub released a boatload of visit duration and search keyword data last week, and the results are somewhat explicit. Among the information the site’s revealed, we’re now privy to each American state’s top three favorite corn-related search terms, as well as the average length of each state’s visit to the site.
The information reveals a few interesting trends—most notably, the unique interests belonging to certain states, like Kentucky’s love of hentai corn (usually Japanese anime), Wyoming’s fascination with smoking-related sex, and Nevada’s singular interest in a corn star named Janita Qeen. But the rest—Asians, teens, compilations, and a few other terms we probably shouldn’t mention—shouldn’t appear so surprising.
A Redditor took that data and made some pretty sweet infographics. And so, it is with great joy that I bring you the top the three CornHub search times for the great state of Oklahoma!
I guess when the New York Times rips off an obscure blog and refers to someone as the “Weather God of Oklahoma City,” people take notice. We have learned that Gary England, our Severe Weather Lord and Savior Emeritus, will be a special guest on tomorrow’s Colbert Report.
And we’re not joking. Here’s the proof:
I think I need to put on a bicycle helmet, move to the center room of my house, and take a bath in a tub of hailstones just to make sure this isn’t a dream. You have Gary England, my hero, being interviewed by Stephen Colbert, the host of my favorite TV show. Did the Make a Wish Foundation get me confused with somebody else? What’s next? Is Kate Upton going to show up at my front door with vodka, cake and a DVD of the 2001 Orange Bowl? I hope so.
Outside of me, the only person more excited about this is Lord England. He’s been in New York tweeting about it. He even provided a glimpse of his wardrobe:
That was fun.
After three weeks and over 40,000 votes (it was way less but I’m too lazy to add them all up), Patrick and I decided to recap at the worst things this town has to offer.
Here’s our “2013 Worst of OKC” recap:
Worst News Station: KOKH FOX 25
Who knew less Speno would make anything worse? Apparently you all do not like this newscast, a whole bunch. That must mean you really hate things that are bad, so I can’t blame you. – Joel
First weekend of the college football season. Which of course meant getting hammered at 9 am in Norman while smoking some brisket, ribs, and chicken awaiting certain disappointment in a few months
Oh, that was last year. And the several years before life kicked me in the crotchel region. I was in Kansas City. With my in-laws. And my 2 kids under the age of 3. Playing golf on Saturday. And having a family gathering that evening.
This past week of Twitter was full of college football. While I really wanted to create an entire post with tweets about how strange it was that the Pride of Oklahoma played the theme song from Maude during half time, I’m not going to do it. Unless Patrick says I can. In which case, expect another MMT later today. But anyway, this week’s tweets are after the jump!
TLO Twitter Spat with Stan Miller:
It all started when some person decided to randomly troll KWTV 9 Morning Anchor Stan Miller on Twitter. You may remember Stan as the two-time winner of our “Worst Anchorman” category in the Worst of OKC or the man with a pretty smile:
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