The Lost Ogle


Oklahoma City News, Entertainment & Occasional Humor • Established 2007

Hey, one OCCC student did possibly protest Mary Fallin!

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Yesterday, I complained that a group of OCCC students backed out of their pledge to protest Mary Fallin’s commencement speech at the school’s graduation on Friday. I then segued into a hurried rant about how The Oklahoman doesn’t like student protests or something.

Here’s a snippet:

I guess this is what I get for trusting the word a community college student.

According to several Moles, the commencement ceremony went off without any hitch or any protest. In fact, the school even honored Governor Fallin by giving her a state trooper blow up doll purchased from Patricia’s. The governor got so flustered she gave it a raise on the spot. I heard everyone got a good laugh out of it.

Well, it looks like I screwed up (again) on a couple different levels.

1. The Ogle Mole who told me about the blow doll was apparently joking around. It was actually Lealon Taylor’s highway patrolman blowup doll. He was trying to loan it to Rick Allen Lippert, and Rick wanted him to wait until after the ceremony, but Joe Dorman needed it later to practice being governor or something. I don’t know. OCCC is a strange place.

2. One student did protest the commencement speech! At least we think she was a student… and protesting. This is because it may have been Christina Fallin in disguise. Here’s the pic:

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Miranda Lambert and Carrie Underwood are now BFFs

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Kevin Durant and Russell Westbrook. Joleen Chaney and Emily Sutton. Wayne Coyne and Christina Fallin. Everyone needs a BFF, and to the delight of many, country beauty and Oklahoma native Carrie Underwood has seem to found her match in fellow country singer and Oklahoma darling Miranda Lambert.

Check the girls out on the red carpet at the Billboard Music Awards last Sunday:

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9 things that OKC kids can’t do anymore

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Perhaps one of everyone’s all-time favorite past times growing up in Oklahoma is complaining about there not being anything to do. This is probably the case for kids everywhere, because when you’re at the mercy of your parents and older siblings to give you a ride, and you’ve saved up all your allowance to discover that you only have $15, there’s not a whole lot you can do. But, we used to do a lot of stuff in the Oklahoma City Metro when I was growing up–a lot of which can’t be done anymore. Sure, kids these days have the Warren Theater and an NBA team, but do you remember back in the day when we had all sorts of fun, a lot of it sketchy and maybe even illegal? I do.

In honor of the end of the school year, I have made a list of things that kids of the Oklahoma City of yesteryear could do that kids these days will never get to experience. Not that they’ll really care–they have Snapchat, and when you have unfettered access to pictures of the genitals of strangers, you’re never really bored.. The onus to find something to do during your summer days doesn’t weigh so heavily upon them as it did on us. But still! Here’s my list of 9 things kids in Oklahoma City can’t do during the summer anymore.

1. Hanging out in the Belle Isle Power Plant

I never did this, but I remember hearing stories of kids sneaking in there before it was knocked down. I guess, for the same effect, you could sneak into the Belle Isle Old Navy and spray paint some of the walls instead. If you’ve ever been there on a Saturday, then you know that no one would even notice because the store is that big of a mess.

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2. Breaking into the Guthrie haunted orphanage

Apparently, now you can get married in a place that my friends and I used to sneak into. No summer was complete without piling into someone’s car and heading up to Guthrie to see if we could see the ghosts of mistreated children. We never saw anything except for trash, grafitti and cops who totally knew what we were up to, but it was a nice break from going to Hafer Park after dark.

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3. Going on an awkward date at Lion’s Fun Park/Perfect Swing

Correct me if I’m wrong, but the only place to get all crazy on some go karts and mini golf these days is Celebration Station. What do the kids even do for fun now when they want to awkwardly hold hands with someone until their mom picks them up?

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The Oklahoman is not a big fan of free speech…

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A few weeks ago, we told you that student protests were planned for Mary Fallin’s commencement speech at Oklahoma City Community College. We told you this because a student sent us the following email:

Dear Lost Ogle,

OCCC students are planning to protest Gov. Fallin speaking at OCCC’s graduation on May 16th by turning their backs and not applauding her speech.

Since 2008, Oklahoma Higher Ed funding has dropped by 106 million, which is about 10%. On Feb. 3rd, Denise Northrup (speaking for Fallin) told State Regents that Fallin’s budget proposal for 2014 included a 5% cut to Higher Ed.

As a consolation to the cuts, Fallin said colleges can use “substantial revolving fund balences”(AKA rainy day funds) to “cushion the blow.”

Teacher pay in Oklahoma is ranked 49th in the country.

These are some of the reasons why students don’t want the governor to speak at their graduation ceremony. It is insulting to have a leader speak at such an occasion when she has been so hostile towards education.

Well, I guess this is what I get for trusting the word a community college student.

According to several Moles, the commencement ceremony went off without any hitch or any protest. In fact, the school even honored Governor Fallin by giving her a state trooper blow up doll purchased from Patricia’s. The governor got so flustered she gave it a raise on the spot. I heard everyone got a good laugh out of it.

This will come as a welcomed news the editorial writing gang at The Oklahoman. They penned a lengthy, preachy editorial criticizing groups who protest University speakers in last Friday’s paper:

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KFOR is home to the PenisTown Clowns…

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KFOR Channel 4 is still doing a good job at trying to pass off anything that’s not news as legitimate news. This time around it has to do with “humiliating” content posted online about a small town police department.

Via KFOR:

An Oklahoma police department has been humiliated in a very public way.

Someone targeted the police department through Google.

Apparently at least one Google user isn’t too happy with the town’s lawmen…

Uh oh, what happened? Did someone on Yelp leave a bad review about the town’s jail? Did a disgruntled citizen create a SEO optimized blog that documents and recaps the domestic abuse and infidelity that once ran rampant in the police department?

Nope, it’s something far more serious.

“Forest PenisTown Clowns” is the first thing that pops up in the Google search, complete with a Google map of the accurate location of the police department and the correct phone number.

“The interesting thing about Google maps is where you found it,” social media expert Patrick Allmond said. “Anybody can put any business or any building on the internet on any address and that’s what somebody did and it looks like somebody wasn’t too favorable about the police department.”

That weird. I always thought PenisTown Clowns was the most popular club inside City Walk. Who knew it doubled as a police station.

Since it’s a news report on KFOR, we also have to see what sex criminal defense attorney and hero who helped rescue Peruvian orphans from raging flood waters David Slane thinks about the deal:

Attorney David Slane said this prank on the police department represents a larger problem.

“But it does point out the larger problem which is identity theft, how easy somebody could take over your Facebook or your Google search,” Slane said.

Although this is prank was funny and amusing, I don’t get how or why this is actual news. Sure, it may shock and scare someone like my 86-year-old grandfather who has never been on the Internet, but as the Tweetbag social media expert Patrick Allmond said, anybody can add any business or building to Google Maps. Hell, it’s easier to add a location to Google than it is Wikipedia.

For example, look what I just added to Google.

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