Welcome back to the Friday mailbag!
Before we get to this week’s reader emails, I ‘d like to welcome Flint as our new mailbag sponsor. Located on the ground floor of the Colcord Hotel downtown, Flint is a new upscale casual restaurant that features contemporary American cuisine. You know, like yummy steaks, seafood and burgers. They have both indoor and sidewalk seating, and are open for breakfast, lunch and dinner.
Because they are nice and kind, Flint will be providing a $25 Gift Certificate to the reader who submits the best email for the next few weeks. Check out the emails and vote for your favorite after the jump:
Happy weekend to you, readers. That was a rough game last night, but I don’t think anyone expected the Thunder to sweep Miami. And if you did, you have really unrealistic expectations. Anyway, it’s good that we have a couple of nights off from Thunder games so we can catch up on sleep. Seriously, can we start the games at 6 PM instead of 8? I know they do that for the west coast but it’s not like anyone in Washington cares about the outcome of the games.
Anyway, here’s your Friday Night in the Big Town.
I know very little about Kevin Hart except that he is the opposite height of the majority of people that we see in the Chesapeake Arena on a regular basis. I know that he’s one of them there comedians and has appeared in several movies. He’s a pretty famous guy who was the MVP of the NBA All-Star Celebrity game even though he got ejected during the fourth quarter.
While I highly doubt Mr. Hart will be ejected during his comedy show, he will be performing at the Chesapeake Arena. The show is a rescheduling of the show that was originally supposed to happen on April 14 but was canceled for severe weather. Tickets for the original date will be honored, and maybe if you show up with a ticket stub for last night’s game, you may get in then too. I don’t know how things like that work.
Before last week, I really didn’t know a lot about Lil Wayne. I knew he was a popular hip hop mogul, convicted felon and creator of cool album covers, but I couldn’t really name you any of his songs or accomplishments. In fact, the only part of Lil Wayne’s repertoire that I was really familiar with was his narration of those Spike Lee directed Gatorade commercials from a few years ago.
Well, thanks to Twitter my familiarity with Lil Wayne has now changed. Now I know he’s nothing but a pompous self-entitled douche bag who expects constant red carpet treatment and for people to worship the ground he walks on. And I’m not the only one. Since he issued tweets that were critical of the Thunder organization for not bowing to his demands, Lil Wayne has become public enemy number one to the Oklahoma City faithful.
This got me thinking about some of the other great celebrity villains in Oklahoma City history. You know, those outsiders that have found a way to piss of everyone in the metro from Highway 9 in Norman to Waterloo Road in Edmond.
Anyway, I decided to take a look at some of these people after the jump. When you read it, keep in mind a couple of things:
1. I’m focusing on people from outside Oklahoma, so don’t expect any nutty politicians, redneck musicians or vanity press publishers.
2. I left Tim McVeigh off the list because nobody deserves to be associated with that guy.
Here we go:
Yesterday, we challenged the Ogle Mole Network to provide us with the identity of the girl who mocked Heat executives Pat Riley and Alonzo Mourning during Game 1 of the NBA Finals.
Here’s what we wrote:
All right, Ogle Mole Network. It’s time to go out and do your investigative research and let us know who this girl is! She looks fun and brave and we want to interview for the site. Also, who’s that Sloth guy with her? Is that her boyfriend or brother or just some guy who really wants a Baby Ruth?
Anyway, leave a comment if you have any ideas about her identity or whereabouts. If you don’t feel comfortable doing that, just contact us instead. Thanks in advance. We know the Ogle Mole Network will not let us down.
As expected, the Ogle Mole Network came through in the clutch. We have discovered that the girl in question is Thunder fan Brittany Parish. The excited dude with scary tattoos who was reaching towards the scoreboard was her husband Patrick Parish.
As is typical in this town, I have learned that Brittany and I are linked by only one-degree of separation. Apparently Brittany works at Salon Envy with a girl named Becky Griffin. Becky (Warner) Griffin lived down the street from me when I was in high school, and is the younger sister of my PC West classmate Zac Warner. If you remember correctly, I beat up Zac Warner, Billy Stone and Josh Pettit during a fight back in high school.
To make things even weirder, Becky Griffin girl is married to my ex-barber Patrick Griffin. I stopped using Patrick so that I could avoid running into my nutty conservative ex-father in law. So basically, I, Patrick Riley, am interviewing a girl named Brittany who knows my ex-barber Patrick Griffin because she and her husband Patrick Parish heckled Pat Riley at a Thunder game.
I’m confused. Here’s the Q&A:
Right now the unofficial Thunder merchandise market is booming. Not satisfied by the typical sporting goods store stock or JC Penny Thunder attire, Thunder fans have flocked to local screen printers and boutiques to snag t-shirts that range from fearing beards to thanking Seattle.
Not to be outdone, the State’s Most Trusted News is now trying to cash-in on the lucrative Thunder-ground (ehh…) apparel market. Check out the following Oklahoman shirts you can purchase online.
Yeah, that’s pretty funny. If there was some CNBC reality show called “Sad Attempts By Businesses to Make Money,” this idea would have to be considered for the pilot episode. Plus, just to make this thing even funnier, take a look at the cheesy attempt by some Oklahoman copywriter to sell and describe the shirt:
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