The Lost Ogle


Oklahoma City News, Entertainment & Occasional Humor • Established 2007

Shannon Miller’s ex-husband was arrested for liking dangerous chemicals…

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And you thought your ex was crazy…

Yesterday, weird news surfaced that Shannon Miller’s ex-husband was arrested in Canada after being linked to a large batch of dangerous chemicals, which probably means he was just a fledgling black market fracking fluid salesman.

From NewsOK.com via the AP:

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The Oklahoman has proven that bigger isn’t always better…

Yesterday afternoon, the day after their sports department was widely criticized around the country for how they handled Berry Tramel’s edited, link-troubled column about Russell Westbrook’s “I don’t like you” dig, NewsOK.com plastered the following ad for their sports department all over the site. I’m sure it was just a coincidence, and had nothing to do with crisis management:

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As a bad Seinfeld impersonator would say, who’s the ad genius that came up with that one?

I guess the message they’re trying to convey is The Oklahoman’s local sports coverage is the best because they have the biggest sports team in the state. As a guy who gets most of his Thunder news from DailyThunder.com, I would totally agree. As I tell my lovers, bigger is alway better. It’s why McDonald’s cooks the best hamburgers, Walmart sells the best groceries, and the Blue Whale is everyone’s favorite animal.

I also like how the OPUBCO copywriters brag about how the sports department delivers “more stories, more content and more insight” than anyone else. Yeah, isn’t that the truth. Who doesn’t read a Jenni Carlson column in the morning and scream “Wow. What amazing insight?!” before taking their pills and masturbating to anime porn. Seriously, insight in The Oklahoman? That would be like us saying we provide more courteous, thoughtful and respectful commentary than anyone.

Anyway, this gave me an idea. We should have one of those Photoshop contest things where we create our own fake ads for the The Oklahoman sports department.

Here are a few examples I rushed out

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Target has “50 Shades” of great merchandising…

I always knew something was up with those electric toothbrushes.

Earlier this week, a photo of “50 Shades of Grey” merchandise being sold next to children’s toothbrushes at a Tulsa Target went viral on the internet.

Here’s the original tweet of the photo:

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That kid from Yukon will never write another letter to an NFL team…

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Remember that sad story about the Cade Pope, the Yukon kid who was forced to become a Carolina Panthers fan?

Well, it’s somehow gotten worse.

The Kansas City Chiefs came across Steve Shaw’s News 9 report and sent representatives from the team down to Yukon. The reason? They wanted to visit and surprise Cade’s little brother, Coy, and thank him for being a lifelong Chiefs fan.

Here’s a report from Chiefs.com

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9 reasons I hold a grudge against Edmond

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Ah, Edmond. It’s a nice, quiet city, the sort of place you want to raise your kids. Unless you were raised there, that is. If you grew up there, you know the ambivalence I’m talking about. Edmond may be home, but you sure as hell don’t tell anyone that when you grow up and go to college. I always thought I wanted to leave Oklahoma, but when I moved out of Edmond, I didn’t feel the urge to do so anymore.

Edmond is the Plano to Oklahoma City’s Dallas–suburban sprawl and mini malls to cater to the most discerning of upper middle class taste. My feelings about Edmond are why I started writing for TLO. And today, I’m going to share with you 9 reasons why I hold a grudge against Edmond.

 

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UCO knocked down my great-grandparents’ house

So, little known Marisa fun fact: my family was from Edmond before Edmond was Edmond, by which I mean before white flight made Edmond the Edmond it is today. My great grandparents owned a house on property that was bought out by Central State University, later UCO. Now, I know that they bought the land from my great-grandparents, and then demolished the house. But as a little kid, I always imagined my pappy and my granny (yeah, that’s what we called them) fleeing for their lives as a wrecking ball swung toward them. To this day, I still cast a wary eye at UCO, lest they come for me.

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$100 senior prom

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