The Lost Ogle


Oklahoma City News, Entertainment & Occasional Humor • Established 2007

Kelly Ogle wants to know if we are living in Revelation…

Last night, News 9 ran a special report investigating whether or not we are living in Revelation. The report was brought to us by Kelly Ogle, because as this promo shows, he’s a real journalist who’s not afraid to ask the tough pandering questions for religious Oklahomans.

From News 9:

The Book of Revelation has been known for centuries as a prophecy of Jesus’ return to earth. A time of tribulation and ultimately the end of the world. Could earthquakes, tsunamis and political tension today be evidence of the predictions listed in the final book of the Bible?

I don’t know about you, but I’m already convinced. Earthquakes, tsunamis and political tension are all relatively new things and are obviously controlled by supernatural beings, so something must be up. News 9 went to a random pastor from Edmond to find out what in the Hell is going on:

Edmond’s Faith Bible Church Pastor Doctor Mark Hitchcock has written 25 books on Biblical prophecy. While he says we don’t know the day of God’s return, Hitchcock believes right now the stage is being set for the end times.

Hold on. The guy’s published 25 books (probably with Tate Publishing) on the Biblical prophecy but doesn’t know when the rapture is going to happen? That would be like writing 25 books about sex and not being able to find a G-spot.

I wonder what makes him think the stage is being set for end times. Global warming? Asteroids?? Oklahoma State being the preseason favorites in the Big 12???

No. He’s concerned about these three things:

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Some capitalist found a great way to profit from the May tornados…

Someone call Macklemore. He needs to pop some tags in Del City. Why Del City? Because apparently there was a “donation station” accepting items for the tornado victims in Moore, and then selling those donated items.

From KFOR:

There are complaints involving items that were donated to tornado victims which ended up for sale in a thrift store.

NewsChannel 4 has been hearing those complaints from tornado victims themselves, a city official in Moore, and now a state representative. This has some folks pretty angry.

Because in the days and weeks, after the tornado NewsChannel 4 saw generous Oklahomans donate food, clothing, furniture; just about anything you can think of to help those who lost so much.

NewsChannel 4 is now hearing numerous complaints about where some of those donations were sent; specifically, concerns that some ended up being sold at a for profit thrift store.

First, I would like to commend this amazing thrift shop for being the model of everything that is great about capitalism! One of the hardest parts of owning a business is the high overhead cost of products. So if you can get the products for free, it doesn’t matter how much you sell that crap for, it’s 100% profit! Also, from what I’ve seen in movies, you’re only really successful if you can screw other people at the same time. So BRAVO, Del City thrift shop!

But like any free-market nightmare, big government is about to get involved.

From KFOR:

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Holy Mackerel! KFOR is giving away a fishing trip with Emily Sutton.

If you’ve ever wanted to spend a boring afternoon with Emily Sutton, today is your lucky day. KFOR has announced a contest where you can go fishing with the two time Ogle Madness champ.

Via KFOR:

Let’s go fishing! Emily Sutton loves to fish and we are giving you a chance to go fishing with her. Watch NewsChannel 4 at 6:00 am to find out more. One lucky winner will win a fishing trip with our NewsChannel 4 meteorologist Emily Sutton.

Fishing sucks. It’s about as fun as mowing the lawn, waiting in the doctor’s office or watching your girlfriend play Candy Crush. That being said, who wouldn’t want to spend a couple of hours in a pond hopper knocking back some cold tall boys with Emily Sutton. You could shoot the shit, identify cloud types, and maybe find out if she’s ever going to get her own Dominator.

So how do you win this fishing trip of a lifetime?

There is a catch (get it?). You will need to send us a photo of you fishing, holding a fish, or in the great outdoors.

Uhm, what??? KFOR really wants user-submitted pics of viewers fishing, holding a fish or enjoying the great outdoors? I’m sure that’s going to work out great. Just take a look at some of the pics from the Bare Knuckle Noodling Babes Facebook page:

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Monday Morning Tweets: Cherry Pie, Hot Oil and Disney movies

Did you know that some people wake up super early in the morning to watch golf tournaments? I had no idea. But that’s the great thing about Twitter. It totally opens my eyes to the weird things that complete strangers do. I can’t say that I have ever woken up early to watch anything on television, but I have combed through all the tweets to tell you precisely which local celebrities would do such a thing. Also, this is probably some sort of feat of super strength, because I have been operating under the impression that golf is on TV on Sunday afternoons so your dad can sleep in a recliner. But to stay awake during normal sleeping hours to watch it? That’s pretty impressive.

Anyway, this week’s tweets are after the jump!

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OKC Media Update: Sports Radio, Departing News Personalities and Morgan Chesky’s Attractive Sister

There’s been some moving and shaking in the local media over the last few weeks. I haven’t really got a chance to write about it any of it, so let’s go ahead and do that now.

jim traber sleeping

Sports Radio:

As we first reported last week, Tyler Media is flipping 107.7FM KRXO to a sports radio format in August. Since we broke the news, there have been a lot of rumors as to who is joining the new station. We’ve addressed some of this on Twitter and Facebook, but I thought I’d officially clarify them here.

This is what we know:

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