The Lost Ogle

Oklahoma City News, Entertainment & Occasional Humor • Established 2007

Liberal Governor Mary Fallin

During one of the times Friedrich Nietzsche was not discussing the state of God, he blurted something that accurately describes the current state of the Republican Party. “In times of peace, the war-like man turns upon himself.”

According to the explicit, global hermetical blog run by Mike McCarville, a GOP committee-woman has begun an email campaign attacking Governor Mary Fallin. The charge: Fallin is too liberal.

The bee that got into Bunny’s bonnet is that Governor Fallin applied for $60 million of federal grant money that would be earmarked for early childhood education. In Chambers’ own words, the money “will result in more pre-school-age children—including infants and toddlers—being enrolled in early childhood education programs.”

Perhaps I’m naive, but that sounds like a good thing. Bunny’s intention was for it to sound scandalous. Chambers feels strongly that “Conservative Governor Frank Keating” would never have kowtowed to the liberal agenda of preparing small children for a life of literacy and education. She asks bluntly:

Should Oklahoma go along with President Obama in his ‘support for a seamless and comprehensive set of services and support for children, from birth through age 5’?

Based on the letter that was sent out to attack their fellow Republican, Chambers opposition boils down to this final conclusion: “Ask her to cut our taxes instead, so we can keep our own money and raise our own children.” Of course, getting a grant means the services are paid for without our own money, so that seems like a strange reason to try to block kids getting a jump start on learning.

There is a better reason for Chambers to suggest that Fallin is being too much of a liberal, though. In a time when Republicans control every aspect of the state’s governance, this wasn’t a Republican idea.

And, yet Gov. Fallin recently said she is committed to seeing that Oklahoma continues to have a strong role in programs that have already been established for early childhood education. It wasn’t our conservative Governor Keating who established those programs.

Any guess at who might have been responsible? Yeah, it was Brad Henry. So, since he wasn’t a “conservative” (here used with the political definition of “belonging to the Republican party”) governor, anything he did has to be undone. If it means back tracking on improvements in education to fight the ghost of Democrats past, so be it. Not doing so is being a traitor to the conservative cause.

So, while Fallin is actually–and it pains me to point this out–going about doing what is best for the state, her fellow party members are attacking her for not being partisan enough. Thankfully, Bunny Chambers is around to keep the bigger picture in perspective.

An Open Letter: Dear Devon Tower

Dear Devon Tower,

I’m onto you and your games.  You may not remember this, but the first time I skipped class was to buy tickets for The Lord of the Rings.  I’ve read LotR so many times that I can quote weird things the Púkel-men said.  I own a complete Frodo costume, and more Peter Jackson-licensed kitsch than anyone who ever plans to have an active sex life should.  So, let’s just say this isn’t my first rodeo.

That’s why I’m aware of what’s going down.  Don’t tell me you’re there to house the day-to-day operations of your company.  I wasn’t born yesterday.  I know that as soon as construction is finished, your tower will house the eye of Sauron.  I know that in Oklahoma history there were 20 rings created.  Most likely, these rings were given to Wiley Post, Will Rogers, Wilma Mankiller, Maria Tallchief, and the Hanson brothers.  And I know there’s one ring to bind them all.  That’s what you’re watching for.  You lost that ring, and now you want it back.

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TLO Contest: Win tickets for six and a limo ride to the Snoop Dogg show at Lucky Star Casino

If you follow the 1990’s music videos I post (almost) every Saturday morning, you may have noticed I’ve been playing some of my favorite Snoop Dogg tracks. This is because Snoop Dog is one of my favorite rappers, he’s playing a concert at Lucky Star Casino on October 26th, and it gives me an excuse to write words like “Shizzle” and “Biatch.”

Well biatches, gather up your posse and check this shizzle out. Lucky Star Casino in Concho is giving away six tickets to the Snoop Dogg concert — plus a limo ride* to and from the show — to one lucky TLO reader. Here’s how the contest works.

1. Leave a reply/comment on this post. In the comment, simply tell us your favorite Snoop Dogg song and why. It can be as long — think Clark Matthews explaining his love for Eddie Sutton — or short — “Lodi Dodi. Because I said so.” — as you like.

2. When you post your comment, be sure to use a current email address in the “email” field.  That’s what we’ll use to contact the winner.

3. On Tuesday, October 18th we’ll randomly select one comment. Whoever posted the comment will be the winner. Pretty easy, huh?

Anyway, we’d like to go ahead and thank our friends at Lucky Star Casino for putting this contest together. Originally, we just asked for a couple of tickets to give away. We had no clue they’d throw in a limo ride, extra tickets, etc. We hope good karma goes to the them, and we hope that good luck goes to you if you decide to enter.

*The free limo ride applies only to the Oklahoma City metropolitan area only. If you want to read the full rules and disclosures for the contest, click here.

The Video Vigilante isn’t much of a vigilante…

Reuters recently did a profile on local perverted videographer extraordinaire Brian Bates. In the story, you get to learn that Bates — better known as the Video Vigilante — videotapes hookers, is a “commercial activist,” and likes to masturbate to all of his videos that feature Asian girls. Just kidding, he probably masturbates to all his videos.


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Tulsa Tuesday: Nightmare on the Broken Arrow Expressway

It’s spooky season and in true suburban fashion, Tulsans have pulled out all the stops. Plywood witches and ghost wind socks decorate neighborhood streets, fun-sized candy bars are in high demand, and even zombies might have appeared on I-44.

For mega-churches, there’s no better time of year than Halloween to blend fear with God-fearing. Although scaring people into Christianity certainly isn’t a novel idea–consult the Left Behind series for a prime example–you can bet that Tulsa Oklahoma, the buckle of the bible belt, will be the champion of such attractions.

The Nightmare is a haunted house with a twist put on by GUTS, a self-proclaimed heavy metal church. I’ll pause for a moment and let you picture their congregation. The Nightmare is primarily marketed towards middle and high school aged students. Rather than frightening their audience with ghosts and goblins (or fire and brimstone), the walk-through tour puts you in the middle of scenes like school shootings, meth labs, suicides, car crashes on prom night, mental hospitals, and the Romans whipping Jesus.

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