The Lost Ogle

Oklahoma City News, Entertainment & Occasional Humor • Established 2007

Westmoore students want to buy your ugly house…

Yesterday, KOCO Channel 5 stirred up a little bit of controversy when they reported that classy Westmoore High School students decided to make fun of other people’s misfortune by holding up yellow “We Buy Houses” signs during Friday’s game against Southmoore. Apparently, the students were poking fun at Southmoore students who lost their home during the Moore tornado.

Well, at least that’s what KOCO Channel 5 wants you to believe:

Crosstown high school rivals collided on Friday night, but Southmoore parents said Westmoore students went too far.

Several described hearing Westmoore students chanting, “We buy houses,” and saw many holding signs with the same message. The students also chanted, “At least we have houses.”

The signs and chants were said to make light of a May 2013 tornado that devastated the city of Moore.

Wow, that’s shocking. Who would have thought that high school students, who are known for their excellent judgement, decision-making and taste in humor, would do something so callous and despicable. Who do they think they are? OSU students?

The answer is no. There are always two sides to every story, and there are even more sides when you’re dealing with the sensationalistic local news media.

According to just about everyone who is not an angry Southmoore parent who likes to overreact, rush-to-judgement, jump-to-conclusions and call the local news channel whenever they see something they do not understand, the signs had nothing to do with the making fun of tornado victims.

In fact, despite how the article makes it sound, photos from the game only show one student even holding a sign. Here are a couple of pics:

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Toby Keith was apparently too drunk at a concert…

Toby Keith performs @ Aarons Amphitheater @ Lakewood in Atlanta Ga. 8-2412 Lisa Keel/ 2012

It’s been a weird couple of weeks for Oklahoma country music superstars.

First, Oklahoma-hatin’ Garth Brooks fell on stage like a friend in low places while trying to jump around like an acrobat, and now Toby Keith is being criticized for being slobberknockered drunk at a concert. Maybe next week Carrie Underwood will have a wardrobe malfunction or something. That would be cool.

Here are the details of Drunky Keith’s debacle from something called Saving Country Music:

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7 things that Oklahomans love to steal…

Some people enjoy stealing… especially when they want something and they don’t wanna pay for it. This is especially true in Oklahoma. In fact, this past weekend a comic friend of mine had his car stolen while he was at an open mic in Bricktown. How shitty is that? And yes, I’m referring to the car and not an open mic in Bricktown.

I’m not sure why people steal. I assume it depends on the person and their situation. Some steal for the rush, some steal because they are in need, some steal to afford an addiction, and some steal because their neighbor doesn’t have a Wi-Fi password. Hey, if you’re not going to protect it, I’m going to use it. I guess that’s not really stealing, is it?

Anyway, here’s a very scientific and comprehensive list of seven things Oklahomans love to steal:

SuperSonics Seattle Trial Basketball

1.) Basketball teams

Get over it Sonic fans, a group of rich dudes bought the team from another rich dude. You can be upset at the rich dudes for screwing you out of a basketball team, but stop being upset at the fans who love them now. I get it though, it’s like getting a divorce and then having to watch your ex become super successful, while you sit at home in your underwear, eating frosting from the can, sob-yelling at the TV, “We drafted KD!”

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The Boston Globe featured an old school travel article about Oklahoma City…

©  Boston Globe

© Boston Globe

In case you missed it, the Boston Globe featured a travel article about Oklahoma City on Sunday. The guest piece was written by Dan McGinn, who is also a senior editor for the Harvard Business Review. Dan and his family were apparently in town for an equestrian event, and I guess he thought a quick article about the visit would be a good excuse to write off the trip.

Despite spending most of his time trapped at the State Fairgrounds, Bricktown and 1-40 and Meridian hotel corridor, McGinn seemed to enjoy his visit to OKC. In fact, he wrote:

“Even if Oklahoma City is not a top-of-mind destination, many of us came home convinced it deserves a place on most bucket lists.”

I’m a homer. As I like to say to girls in Bricktown, I was born in this city, raised in this city, and am probably going to die in this city. I like it when The Boston Globe, Meet The Press, New York Times and happy old Seamus come to town and are impressed with what they see and experience, but if “Visit Oklahoma City” is on your travel bucket list, it either means:

A. You need a better bucket list.

B. You’re an East Coast Elitist who writes for the Harvard Business Review and has already visited many of the world’s finest cities and places.

Seriously, feel free to say nice things about us, National Travel Writers, but please make it believable. Although we’re pretty sure they are already paying people to write nice things about Oklahoma City, we don’t want people to think the Chamber is paying people to write nice things about Oklahoma City. Tone it down a little, or the next time you’re in town we’ll take you to Lyrewood Lane.

Actually, you can tell the local Chamber of Commerce had nothing to do with this article. That’s because it doesn’t used any of the buzzwords commonly found in any article about Oklahoma City. You know what I’m talking about – those dozen or so words that you would think are part of some Oklahoma City Travel Article Generator. Noticeably absent were stalwarts such as:

• Thunder
• Bombing
• Devon Tower
• The Flaming Lips
• Renaissance
• Boathouse
• Presti
• Cornett
• Midtown
• Rowing
• Tornado* (Okay, there was one reference, but it’s just a one-time only reference to Tornado Alley)

So, how was a writer able to pen something about The OKC without using those words? Easy. He went old school. Outside of a few mentions of Bricktown, this was like reading a magazine article about Oklahoma City from 1994. It focused on Oklahoma City’s western heritage, western culture and the western stereotype image the city’s been trying so hard to distance itself from over the years. Hell, the damn thing is even called “Cowboy Up.”

For example, the highlight of his “family trip” was riding the mechanical bull at the Sooner Corral:

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This guy found a smart way to get cops to find his stolen car…

william johnson

I’d like to nominate William Johnson (pictured above) for the Journal Record’s 2015 “Innovator of the Year.” Hopefully he’ll be allowed to accept the award while in jail.

On Friday night, Johnson’s Suburban was stolen from a Tulsa gas station. He then did what any smart person would do when their car is jacked and they want to find it. He called police, reported the crime, and, oh, kind of lied about a five-year-old kid being in the backseat, triggering a statewide Amber Alert and sending 60+ Tulsa police officers in search of the stolen vehicle.

What could go wrong with that?

Via News 9:

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