Today is the first Monday after Thanksgiving. That means:
1. You’re slouched over in your cubicle drinking crappy coffee and struggling to keep your eyes open.
2. You’re wearing your “loose-fitting” clothes and plan on having Subway for lunch.
3. You’re about to browse for over-hyped “Cyber Monday” deals on your computer.
Yep, today is Cyber Monday. It’s the day we update our shopping carts with the best online deals, look for the 3-digit security code and click the “place order now” button.
Since we’re all about supporting local businesses here at The Lost Ogle, we put our brains together and came up with a special list of eight local gifts you can buy online. That way you can participate in Cyber Monday while still keeping your money in the Sooner State. Here they are:
1. Jenni Carlson T-Shirt Coffee Mug
We’ve had several inquiries as to whether or not we actually have any of the Young Jenni Carlson T-Shirts that we referenced in this post last August (and currently use on our twitter profile). The answer is no. But know what we do have? Young Jenni Carlson T-Shirt Coffee Mugs(seriously)!!!!!! They are only, uhhhh, $19.99 and make the perfect gift for any White Elephant, Dirty Santa or Jim Traber Drinking Game party!
(Update: Mug has been removed from Zazzle via request by OPUBCO.)
2. Full Year Membership to JessJane.com. A gift membership to the website of Jesse Jane is the perfect gift to the special pervert in your life. It’s only $89.99 and will have your man singing “Ho Ho Ho” for all of 2012!
3. The Signature Line of Rick Mitchell Apparel at Sears
If the “My Dad is Trying Too Hard” look doesn’t tickle your fancy, you can always surf the internet for one of Mike Morgan’s Bedazzled Weather Ties.
4. Oklahoma City Barons Tickets
Now that the NBA lockout is over, I’m sure Oklahoma City Barons tickets are going to be even cheaper…and more available. Also, does the end of the NBA lockout mean we are going to see fewer “Built in OKC” Barons commercials featuring Canadian-born journeyman who want to be built in Oklahoma City as much as we want to be built in Manitoba?
5. SandRidge Energy Energy Gift Card
Speaking of bad commercials, what’s up with the new TV spot SandRidge Energy put together? When I watch it, I’m not sure if I’m supposed to cry or be inspired to cry. All I know is it makes me feel guilty and sad kind of like when you see a baby bird on the ground. Hell, after it was filmed I bet one of the rowers drowned in her own tears.
Anyway, it can’t be a good thing for one of your city’s large employers and corporate stewards to start churning out commercials that remind you of gay marriage commercials gone viral. Maybe we should all buy our friends some SandRidge Energy Energy Gift Cards for Christmas? Maybe it will help them pick up business.
6. Jack and Ron’s Collector Buttons
Yes, this is real. Yes, it cost $2.95. And yes, nothing says “I hate you” more than a bunch of Jack and Ron’s Collector Buttons.
7. Gift Subscription to OETA’s Odyssey
This is a great gift for either your grandma, liberal uncle or university professor. It would also be a good practical joke to play on a Republican legislator. Seriously, just go to OETA and make a donation on their behalf. Then set up a spy camera at their house to see what they do when they get their first OETA Odyssey in the mail. Do they look around to see if any neighbors saw? Or do they play it cool and just lump it in the junk mail with everything else?
p.s. – Your grandma would really love it if you got BJ Wexler to autograph a copy for her.
8. Buy something from one of these advertisers you see on this site
On a serious note, be a good Ogle Mole and support the local businesses who have a good sense of humor and support this obscure local social blog you’re reading. Without them, there may not be a Lost Ogle. And that would make 85% of the elected officials, news media and hipsters-related-to-Governors in this town way too happy!