Mailbag: Barkley Fallin Chopper 4 Elf Child

Usually I like to post the mailbag earlier in the day, but I’ve been dealing with fallout from the Tate Publishing story that was first reported by Brianna Bailey with the Journal Record. Apparently, Tate Publishing went on a witch hunt and fired 25 employees for allegedly spreading rumors that the company was about to outsource most of its work to the Philippines. This then prompted the company CEO and Asshole of the Year frontrunner Ryan Tate to bully, intimidate and threaten the remaining employees during a staff meeting. Here’s a link to the audio. We’ll have more info on this story on Monday, and if you work or worked at Tate and want to talk to us, send us an email.

Anyway, to the mailbag. Last week’s winning email was about Liz Dueweke’s contrived lack of self-esteem. It was sent to us by Lindsay, who will win a $25 Gift Certificate to Kaiser’s Bistro. Here are this week’s questions:

Al writes:

For someone who has done nothing but badmouth Oklahoma, as well as lie about never stepping foot in OKC (thanks for debunking that TLO), Charles Barkley made a grandiose spectacle of coming here. Mayor Mick and especially Governor Fallin seemed to go out of their way to welcome this tubby, ring-less, loudmouth, golfer. So my question is, if Obama would have belittled a whole state before coming here, do you think the hot-tubbing, jet-setting, “family values” candidate Mary Fallin would have taken time out from her out-of-state vacation of hypocrisy and actually welcomed the President of the United States to our great state?

Ryan writes:

Is it bad that I don’t think Mary Fallin serving Charles Barkley fried testicles on live TV is the kinkiest thing in her career?

Linda writes:

What are the chances that Charles Barkley was invited to see Mary Fallin’s perfectly temperatured hot tub?

Yes, we received three email submissions that had to do with Charles Barkley and Mary Fallin. When some alien race stumbles across the remains of our civilization, let’s hope they don’t find this mailbag.

Anyway, all three people bring up good points. It is kind of funny that the Governor could make time for a cartoony basketball analyst, but not the President of the United States. And the thought of seeing Charles Barkley and the Governor spending time in a 105 degree hot tub is humorous. I’m not sure about the fried testicle thing, though. That’s terrifying.

Jordan writes:

Read your post about how Bob Moore Chopper 4 got damaged by the hail and it’ proves that Karma is a bitch for KFOR. Say this because I’ve heard from good News 9 sources that last year KFOR wouldn’t let Jim Gardner out of his contract so they just let him hang in the hanger all day until his contract expires. Well he had a heart attack while on the job so KFOR had to pay for all of his medical bills on top of paying him to do nothing except train the new guy. Then to top it off they hire a guy who is a tad boring and brings nothing to the table other than he flew a helicopter in the war which really brings nothing to the news world. So add all of this to the fact their chopper is damaged, how much do you think Jim Gardner is enjoying all this knowing all that’s happen the past yearsince you broke the news he’s leaving that he’s come out smelling like roses while KFOR has had everything go wrong with the chopper?

Uhm, Jim Gardner had a heart attack? What the hell??? How are we just now hearing about this? Bad job, Ogle Mole Network. Bad bad bad job.

Sam writes:

My wife moved is new to Oklahoma, and while watching the news, she asks me “Do you think Rusty McCranie and Anita Blanton have secret elf children with silly hair?”
What do you think?

If this email doesn’t win, I’m going to murder an elf child.

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