Before we start with this week’s meaningless in-the-whole-scheme-of-things tweets from random Oklahoma “celebrities,” let me encourage you to donate to the Sandy Hook School Support Fund that was created by the United Way of Western Connecticut. It’s one small way to help the families of victims and all the other people affected by Friday’s tragedy.
This week’s tweets are after the fold.
Overheard in the Newsroom- @TiffanyTatro: "He asked me out for coffee, and I said– 'coffee stains your teeth' I didn't know what to say!"
— Priscilla Luong (@priscillaluong) December 16, 2012
Ladies: you do not have to go out with us. Please learn to let us down a little easier, though! “No, I don’t want to go out with you. Also? That coffee you drink is going to leave you looking absolutely hideous!” is not a great way to decline a date.
So Marilyn Monroe is your idol? But you can't name one movie she was in? Hmmmmm…
— Greyson Chance (@greysonchance) December 15, 2012
Greyson Chance was born in 1997. He’s fifteen years old! That’s way too young to be so cynical about people being phonies. He’s probably right, though. Next time I’m tempted to lie about having read Slaughterhouse Five in order to fit in with a group people cooler than me, I’m going to picture Greyson Chance’s eyes judging me and maybe it will lead me to a more honest life.
Me loudly singing “Oklahoma!” is just as accurate as a Breathalyzer.
— Conan O'Brien (@ConanOBrien) December 16, 2012
Thanks, Conan! We’re honored! That’s so true, too. “Oklahoma” is the best song to sing when you’re drunk. We’re #1! We’re #1! We’re #1! “My Old Kentucky Home” can suck it.
Sherri Coale used the word 'cathartic' to define her team's emotions after UNT. Incredible word selection by the former English teacher.
— Stephanie Kuzydym (@stephkuzy) December 14, 2012
Is “cathartic” really that amazing of a word? Kuzy sounds crazily impressed that Sherri Coale would use it. I dunno about that. I’m a complete moron and even I’ve used that word before.
"I'm not that fired up about ranch dressing. It's like putting on sweatpants first thing in the morning. You're not trying." –@BerryTramel
— Lindsay Thomas (@alamokie) December 13, 2012
Lindsay Houts is something called the “Digital Sports Editor” for NewsOK Sports. I don’t know what that is but if it has anything to do with that Reynolds Ford auto-play ad I hate her with the passion of a thousand burning suns, but if she can keep bringing Boomer Tramel’s words of wisdom to the masses, she’ll be my hero. Tramel is absolutely right about this. I couldn’t have said it any better. Hopefully Marisa will learn her lesson.
Hangin with @nickcollisin4 again .. This time 8 shots each… http://t.co/9ltnO9tv
— Wayne Coyne (@waynecoyne) December 15, 2012
Hmmm, I’m not sure how I feel about this burgeoning friendship. I don’t really have the contempt for Wayne that so many people have shown lately, but I’m not sure this is great news for the Thunder. Although if Wayne could loan Collison some of those gigantic hands it could really help with his offensive rebounding.
What a view! At the Vast (restaurant on top of the Devon Tower) for the first time. Wow! pic.twitter.com/yartRYU4
— Linda Cavanaugh (@linda4news) November 10, 2012
— Michelle Apon (@MichelleApon) October 28, 2012
— Kisha Henry (@KishaHenryKMBC) December 11, 2012
— Rusty Surette (@KBTXRusty) December 1, 2012
— Vanity Perkins (@VanityHearts5) December 11, 2012
View of Chase building from floor 50 pic.twitter.com/gIxjqvKx
— Maggie Stokes (@MaggieAStokes) October 24, 2012
Has anyone else noticed people tweeting out their views from Vast, like, all the time now? I get it, I really do. I’d probably do the same thing. It’s super high up there! But enough is enough. As Oklahoma City’s self-declared Twitter guru, I’m declaring a moratorium on tweeting pictures of your views from Vast. As Marisa told me when we were talking about this, “I’m tired of those pictures. I miss Instagrams of tacos and beer.” I will let you know when it is ok to tweet Vast pictures again..
A Bunch Of Random People On Twitter
This week I did a search for the words “Oklahoma” and “Drivers.” Finally, we’re included in a list with Lil Wayne!
The Jim Traber Loves Exclamation Points Tweet Of The Week!!!!!
This week, Jim gives three exclamation points and a whole bunch of lol’s to a thoroughly mediocre joke about the Mayans that. And, BTW, thank god we’re going to stop having to hear about the Mayans so much after this week is over.
The Dean Blevins Memorial Weekly Tweet From Dean Blevins
When u start the day w a colonoscopy the rest of the day is a piece of cake. #tootinghornsalldaylong
— Dean Blevins (@DeanBlevins) December 11, 2012
I gotta say, Dean’s logic is unassailable. Still, I think this falls into the realm of “Too Much Information.” It does provide us with a great chance to quote Fletch, though. “You using the whole fist, Doc?”
That’s all for this week. Follow me on Twitter here. Good bye!