Don’t expect the earthquakes to let up anytime soon…

Earlier this week, the Oklahoma Geological Survey finally acknowledged what anyone not employed by the Oklahoma Geological Survey has known all along: that pumping millions upon millions of gallons of toxic wastewater deep into our earth's crust is the cause of the earthquake boom that's damaging our homes and raising our anxiety levels.

So, how did our Oklahoma legislature respond to this news? Are they going to put a moratorium on wastewater injection until we figure out a way to do it without causing earthquakes?

Nope. They let us know whose side they are really on by advancing Senate Bill 809 – The Earthquakes Forever Act – through the House. The law will prohibit local officials and municipalities from taking action and instituting their own bans on fracking and oil drilling. The measure simply awaits a "Yes" vote by our Republican-controlled Senate and a signature by our ditzy Governor to become law. It's going to happen.

The mind-fuckingly awful irony and absurdity of the situation was noticed by just about everyone. Even the The Daily Show got in on the action. Check out the video:

That's great. It's good to see the Oklahoma Substandard getting the national attention it deserves. I bet people and businesses can't wait to move here after seeing a story like this.

That being said, the segment did miss some things. For example...

1) It failed to show how sweet of a deal this is for the Energy Industry...

If local governments could stop fracking in their communities, the industry would have to spend millions of dollars trying to control and rig local mayoral and city council elections. By getting this new law passed, energy lobbyists can now continue focusing all their money and attention on our three corporation commissioners. In a weird way, that's probably the only positive thing about the law. Maybe, just maybe, it will keep the industry out of local elections.

2) It failed to mention how screwed we really are...

With the people now unable to control or regulate the drilling impact in their local community, it's up to those corporation commissioners to shut down dangerous, earthquake-causing injection wells. Yeah right, like that's really going to happen.

Not only is the Corporation Commission essentially sponsored by the energy industry, but it's also understaffed and underfunded. This is because the same lawmakers who voted for SB 809 have also cut the Corporation Commission's budget over the past few years, making it even more difficult for the agency to regulate all the wastewater wells that dot our state.

3) It failed to highlight the hypocrisy of Oklahoma lawmakers...

Once again, the asshats in the legislature all run for office on limited government and state's rights campaigns that demonize the over-reaching arms of the meddling federal government, yet they turn around and pass bullshit like SB 809 that prevents municipalities from setting their own local laws and regulations. I know you can't make a direct comparison to the issue of states' rights versus those of cities, but seriously, fuck those hypocrites. For a group of people who really love to hate on gays, they sure do love having the energy industry's cock in their mouths. Represent the people... not the greedy bastards caused this whole earthquake problem in the first place.