It’s good to see David Stanley’s unethical advertising practices are paying off for someone!
Thanks to a tip via the Ogle Mole Network, we have learned that Rob Stanley, the douche face of those shady, deceptive, commercials that violate advertising rules created to protect consumers, is married to this aspiring beauty pageant contestant and certified hot mom:
In case you care, the beautiful woman’s name is Emerald Roush Stanley. She’ll be competing for the title of Mrs. America in Las Vegas later this month. Her platform is “Consumer Advocacy.” Well, at least it should be.
Here’s a Facebook post about how she qualified for the pageant.
Yep, be sure to keep the affluent pretty women in your prayers as she competes in a beauty pageant! That’s definitely a pray-worthy cause. Save the ones for poor people ripped off by the David Stanley autogroup for some other time.
As she explains in her Facebook post, Mrs. Stanley qualified for the Mrs. America field via a “First Runner Up” competition, which means she’s not even the real Mrs. Oklahoma. I heard she narrowly lost that contest after slipping up in the talent competition. She apparently asked for a better score, but the judge from Tulsa said he’d have to talk to his manager.
Also, how does one win a “First Runner Up” competition? That’s like inviting the best backup quarterback to the Pro Bowl. Did David Stanley Jeep Dodge hook up the judges with a bunch of cars for $88? Did she win a musical chairs battle with all the other first losers? We want details!
Like most affluent beauty pageant contestants, Emerald has many people to thank for her success, including her loving husband Rob Stanley, a.k.a. the stud who’s helped his family mislead, coerce and rip off consumers for all these years:
First of all, I think the phrase “Handsome Stud” is the last thing people think of when Rob Stanley screams at them on the TV screen. It’s usually something else like “Will you please hit the mute button” or “hand me the sledgehammer.”
Second, it’s always nice to see that a person who profits from milking consumers via unethical advertising methods is such a loyal, hardworking family man with an unwavering love for God! I bet the heavenly father really appreciates all the good, honest work Rob Stanley’s done in Oklahoma. Let’s be honest. God is a free market type of deity. In fact, I think it was Jesus who once said “Blessed are those with bad credit: for we can find them a car they can afford… with no money down, 22% interest and negative loan to value equity.”
Anyway, the Mrs. America pageant is August 25 at the Westgate in Las Vegas. We wish Mrs. Runner Up the best of luck in bringing home the crown. We’ll be praying for her to win. We’ll also be praying for the local media to do their job and warn readers and viewers that the David Stanley advertisements they see in the newspaper and/ or local news may violate advertising regulations, which then helps the dealership take advantage of unsuspecting consumers. Hopefully all of our prayers will come true.