Skip to Content
Everything Else

Great. Now Oklahoma lawmakers are talking secession…

1:31 PM EST on January 24, 2017

The putz pictured above is State Senator Joseph Silk. He hails from the southeastern corner of Derplahoma and over the last couple of years has established himself as one of the most ambitious, twisted, closed minds in the Oklahoma legislature.

For example, in 2016 he proposed the "Oklahoma Right of Conscience Act." It would have allowed business to discriminate against gay people. That same year, he also proposed an anti-trans bathroom bill and legislation that would make performing an abortion murder. Did I mention he's one of our most ambitious, twisted, closed minds?

For this legislative session, Joseph is turning his attention to something that's near and dear to every southeastern Oklahoma bigots heart – secession.

Via KFOR:

A state lawmaker wants to make it okay for Oklahoma to secede from the United States...

This session, Senator Joseph Silk is proposing to make a change to Section I-1 of Oklahoma’s constitution.

Currently, it reads:

“The State of Oklahoma is an inseparable part of the Federal Union, and the Constitution of the United States is the supreme law of the land."

Silk wants to remove the word “inseparable,” because he said it does not line up with the foundation of our country.

"Clearly, our founding fathers believed that no people or group of people should be inseparably bound politically to another," Silk said.

That's nice and everything, but is Joseph not aware that his guy won?

Seriously, look it up. Donald Trump's president now. Not Obama or Hillary Clinton. As a result, there's really no need to pander to militiamen with wild buckshot dreams of rebellion and secession. As all the Confederate flags flying around Southeastern Oklahoma tell us, these folks as happy as can be. Joseph should save this blatant attempt to pander to racist, bigoted gun nuts for a more appropriate time. It's like he played a hidden immunity idol for no reason. This may come back to haunt him.

He said the goal of his bill is not to try and secede.

"I don't think Oklahoma needs to secede. I don't think anyone needs to secede right now. However, you know, 30-40 years from now whenever, you know, my kids are having families what if the United States comes and turns into a, you know, communist country?” Silk asked...

It is a controversial issue that has Oklahomans thinking.

"I don't know that secession from the United States, that I would personally be in agreement with," said Dillon Pierce.

"I think the constitution should allow for it in the future, that the states should have the power to secede or do whatever necessary to keep their people safe," said Rachel Balocca.

If the measure is passed, Oklahomans will get to vote on it.

So we may get to vote on whether or not we want to make it easier to secede? Fuck it – why the hell not? I doubt the rest of America will care. "Yeah, good luck with that Oklahoma. Go be a country a now." Also, if we're going to make it easier to secede, it might as well be while Trump's president. That will send a message, and we'll at least be able to say we gave it a shot as we hammer away in Russian labor camps.

Stay in touch

Sign up for our free newsletter