8 Things Ruining Oklahoma More Than Big Tax Breaks

KFOR recently reported that Oklahoma’s capital gains tax break, which was created to stimulate the economy, has actually cost our state about $500 million while only stimulating about $9 million in revenue. Some are arguing that this tax break has ruined the Oklahoma economy. But I am going to argue that there are worse things going on in our state. So here are 10 things that are really ruining Oklahoma.

The Pothole at 178th and May is Really Ruining the Economy

Every time I turn east at that intersection, I feel like I am going out Thelma and Louise style by driving off a cliff. The hole is deep enough that Mary Fallin has recently sent a Devon representative out to see how much oil he can pump from it. It is a double whammy. The pothole is not only ruining cars, which is likely costing Oklahomans thousands. But the tax breaks Fallin is giving the Devon representative who is drilling from the hole is preventing the state from acquiring the revenue to get it fixed.


The Womb is Ruining Expectations for Oklahoma Women

The Womb is an art gallery co-started by members of the Flaming Lips. The gallery is ruining the lives of Oklahoma women because of its unrealistic expectations of what a womb should actually look like.


The Ghost of Mister Ed is Ruining Fun

Mister Ed was a television show in the 1960s about a talking horse that caused more problems for the Post family in one episode than all Oklahoma lawmakers have caused in the last three legislative sessions. The gravesite of this fantastic beast can be found outside of Tahlequah. However, his ghost can be found haunting the State Fair Grounds after dark. He doesn’t really do anything to those he appears to. He just brings existential guilt because you know when one of the horses starts talking, you’ve had enough to drink.

Corporate Greed is Ruining Oklahoma Beauty

Yeah, everyone knows that corporate tax breaks have done damage to Oklahoma’s day-to-day funding. But that isn’t even the worst part. It has also perpetuated an eyesore. Love’s Travel Stops’ logos are seen scattered all along Oklahoma highways. The company reportedly brings in $16 billion in revenue. Yet none of that money has been used to update their logo that looks like something an 8-year-old would make when they finally figure out how to color in the lines.

White Supremacists are Ruining OSU

A white supremacist group has been putting up propaganda posters all across Oklahoma State University’s campus. I don’t even have anything witty to say here because it doesn’t need an argument. The white supremacists are just ass-hats who ruin things.

Young Living Essential Oils are Ruining Cheap Auto Insurance Across the State

FACT. 47% of Oklahoma women between the ages of 25 and 54 sell Young Living Essential Oils. FACT. Car insurance for this age group in our state has recently gone up 317%. Why is this? Because it is not enough to solicit your friends to sell them your overpriced tea tree oil that promises to cure cancer, the common cold, and the war on drugs. You also have to cover your entire rear windshield with the advertisement of your Young Living company. You bet people will remember seeing your company name when you are backing out of the parking spot at Target. They will especially remember it as they are filing their hit and run police report because you couldn’t see them through your own vinyl advertisement.

Texas is Ruining Oklahoma Education

Texas is offering Oklahoma teachers thousands of dollars more in pay than Oklahoma schools. Forget our lack of funding or respect for teachers. It is all Texas’ fault our education system is failing.

460,298 Oklahomans are Ruining Everything

460,298 voted for Mary Fallin in the 2014 election. This was even after she rejected Medicaid expansion in 2012, made it harder for LGBT National Guard members to get benefits in 2013, and created ridiculous tax breaks for oil and gas companies in 2014. Voters, it is about time we take responsibility for what is ruining Oklahoma.

Hayley has a smart mouth, so her grandpa says. Follow her on twitter @squirrellygeek