So it turns out I am not the most cat-obsessed person in the state after all. My therapist is going to be thrilled to hear that! Yesterday a Midwest City woman was discovered housing over 50 cats!
MIDWEST CITY, Okla. —The Central Oklahoma Humane Society faced a big task Wednesday night, looking for homes for 52 cats found living in a Midwest City home.
A picture from Animal Welfare in Midwest City shows dozens of crates across the front lawn of a home near Reno and Douglas avenues.
The woman who kept the cats didn’t want to talk on camera but said she’s rescued a number of furry felines over the last few years. The cats were either abandoned or left out in the cold.
Unfortunately, the cats themselves declined to comment and the name of the woman was never revealed in the article. However, if you have more than 50 cats living in your home, there is an 87% chance that your name is Debra or Cathy. So let’s go with Cathy.
More from Cathy…
“Because I care about them. I just like cats,” the woman said when asked about why she had so many.
The woman didn’t realize just how many cats she had.
“I just like cats and cats multiply a lot. Quite fast,” she said.
Now, in Cathy’s defense she thought she was doing right by her furry companions. And nobody has the intention of adopting so many cats. There wouldn’t be enough of your body to go around when you eventually die and the cats eat you.
Midwest City police said the woman doesn’t face any charges at this time.
Thirty-one cats are in the Central Oklahoma Humane Society’s custody and are being treated. The rest are at the Midwest City Animal Shelter, which will determine if and when the cats can be adopted.
We all look at Cathy and think her pet collection is a little excessive. I am not going to argue with you there. However, I do believe there are a lot of things worse than 52 cats that you can find in someone’s home, including:
If you walk into someone’s home and find a 12-pack of Dr. Thunder in that weird refrigerator door shelf, that is not a person you should associate with. You do not need that kind of negativity in your life.
Argue with me on this. I dare you.
I don’t care if Jesus is there to carry you across the beach to teach you life lessons or bring about the end of the world. Either way, he knows you masturbate, so you probably don’t want to see him.
An Oil Portrait of Themselves Over the Fireplace
If you see this, there is a 93% chance the homeowner is an oil overlord or the lead suspect in his second wife’s untimely demise. Either way, get the hell out.
If finding 52 cats is bad, finding 53 cats has to be worse.
Channel your inner Bob Barker and have your pets spayed or neutered. Then follow Hayley on twitter @squirrellygeek