The Wednesday before Thanksgiving is probably the most stressful day of the year. If you aren’t elbowing strangers through the Walmart aisle looking for Crisco and those little corn holders that actually look like corn, you’re mentally preparing yourself to spend the next day with between eight and 30 of your least favorite relatives, who will be arriving to your home with their political beliefs, kids and seven containers of green bean casserole. Just thinking about Thanksgiving Eve is enough to make you feel tense. Thank God Patricia’s has just what you need to relieve some of that tension. Or increase it, if you know what I mean…
This week, our old friend Patricia’s – a longtime sponsor of The Lost Ogle and our invite-only Friday night dinner parties – is hosting Black Lace Wednesday. It’s a pre-Thanksgiving celebration of intimacy, fun gifts and discounts worth lusting over. They’re even going to have…
Condom popping for discounts
Wednesday, come inside (that’s what she said) your favorite Patricia’s metro location to select a condom balloon to pop and reveal a discount of up to 50% off of your purchase! I can’t think of any other time in which it would actually be this good to bust a condom.
Here are a few items you can get during the special sale:
After you’ve popped that condom, make sure you apply that discount to an Adam & Eve Ravishing Rabbit thruster or Evolved Pearl Rabbit. Because Easter isn’t the only holiday that deserves a bunny.
Black lace getups
Patricia’s may be known for their friendly customer service and an eclectic array of gadgets and gizmos a-plenty for your sexual health needs. But this Wednesday, make sure to stop by to check out their gorgeous selection of black lace lingerie. From seductive body suits and sultry stockings, to dainty drawers and alluring accessories, Patricia’s has it all. And – unlike those polyester cotton Walmart undies with some cartoon animal that you typically wear – the black lace is just as appealing on or off.
Personal vibrators and lubricant
With numerous shapes, styles and even colors, Patricia’s is sure to have the right vibrator to meet your needs. Whether or not you are enjoying the toy with a partner, make sure to pick up a bottle of Wicked brand water-based (or even flavored!) lubricant. With flavors like Sweet Peach and Salted Caramel, even after Thanksgiving dinner, you’ll be sure to make room for this dessert.
Vibrating and realistic strokers
From the vibrating and stimulating, to the realistic and fetishistic, Patricia’s offers a variety of strokers for you or your sweetie’s needs. Because the turkey shouldn’t be the only thing getting stuffed this year.
Patricia’s is a sponsor of The Lost Ogle and this piece. My grandma reads everything I write. Follow Hayley on twitter @squirrellygeek