TLO 50: The Craziest, Wildest and Most Popular Stories of 2018 (Part 3)

Welcome back to the TLO 50 – a chronological countdown of our craziest, wildest and most popular Stories of 2018. If you missed parts 1 & 2, you can click on them below:

TLO 50: Part 1
TLO 50: Part 2

Today we’ll be focusing primarily on stories from our state’s wild and wacky summer of elections, media gaffes and men having sex with ponies…

30- 10 Oklahoma Political Candidates You Should Know About

Published: June 25, 2018

What We Said: “The sarsaparilla salesman pictured above is Jason Foghorn Harris III. His hobbies include bare knuckle boxing, reading the Art of Manliness, and waving to children from the back of the caboose. He also sings in three barber shop quartets and likes to restore old sod houses and covered wagons.”

Why It Was Crazy: A running theme in this year’s review posts (and really TLO in general) is that most of the people who run for office in Oklahoma are such a quirky collection of weirdos and it’s incredible that our state is able to occasionally get anything done.

29- Haywood Jablowme for Governor signs poke up across NW OKC

Published: June 25, 2018

What We Said: “Earlier this morning, motorists from all across the north metro were greeted by campaign signs for a mysterious Gubernatorial candidate named Haywood Jablowme. We think he may be the owner of the new In-N-Out Burger going up along NW Expressway.”

Why It Was Crazy: Jack Meoff conceding before voting began.

28- Paul Folger is leaving Channel 5…

Published: July 9, 2018

What We Said: “This may seem like a surprise, but I’ve heard rumblings things weren’t so rosy between Paul and Channel 5 management. During the last round of contract negotiations, I guess Paul got very upset when Channel 5 refused to give him his own Ogle-esque nightly opinion piece called “Folger’s Crystals.” It was supposed to be a light-hearted piece where he would share notes and tidbits from his adventures through the state. I guess Abigail wouldn’t stand for it, and the whole deal fell apart.”

Why It Was Crazy:
For as much as we talk about Oklahoma City being a ‘Big League City,’ the siren’s song of Minneapolis still called to Paul. Things haven’t felt the same since he left, but somehow, we manage to get by.

27- Oklahoma State Board of Health votes to sabotage SQ 788!

Published: July 10, 2018

What We Said: “Earlier today, the Oklahoma State Board of Health (OSBH) – a collective of holier than thou, authoritarian physicians who are aligned with those who spent nearly $1-million to unsuccessfully defeat SQ 788 at the ballot box – voted to implement emergency draft rules that effectively overrule the will of the people and sabotage SQ 788, turning “the most liberal medical marijuana law in the country” into one of the most restrictive.”

Why It Was Crazy: It’s impossible to have something nice in Oklahoma without some local agency just corrupting everything. Luckily, the OSBH didn’t get their way, and one can now purchase bud with a doctor’s recommendation.

26- Lance West resigns from KFOR over sexting controversy!

Published: July 18, 2018

What We Said: “The resignation took the metro media scene by surprise, and came just hours after a short-lived Twitter account named “JustaGirl35” tagged @KFOR with several screenshots showing salacious private messages that West exchanged with a woman via social media.”

Why It Was Crazy:
Granted, Lance ‘Danger’ West wasn’t a politician, but he should have still paid attention to the mishaps of Anthony Weiner. That said, it’s kinda wild that he felt the need to resign over something like a sexting scandal. That’s so 2012.

25- Lacey Swope is returning to Channel 9!

Published: July 25, 2018

What We Said: “All corporate spin and bullshit aside, the real reason Lacey is in and Robyn is out is simple – ratings. According to some Moles, News 9’s morning show ratings have fallen like golfball sized hail since Lacey went to Tulsa. That, coupled with Robyn’s inability to connect with Oklahomans through Bass Pro selfies, led to the short-lived Lacey in Tulsa experiment.”

Why It Was Crazy:
You know that the summertime is slow for local news when nearly all of our top stories so far have involved the comings and goings of local broadcasters. Still, we’re happy to have the Ogle Madness legend back with us here in OKC.

24- 7 local businesses that tried to defeat SQ 788…

Published: August 2, 2018

What We Said: “The money for the campaign primarily came from the Oil Overlords. They dug through the seat cushions at Vast to provide a half-million dollars in funding. Although they knew the money was being wasted on a losing cause, they played along.”

Why It Was Crazy:
Basically every white dude in a cheap suit that you’ve seen try to sell you junk on TV (Bob Mills, Bob Howard, probably other Bob’s as well) were so opposed to legalized marijuana that they dropped tons of cash to try and prevent it. Somebody needs to pass them the dutchie and see if they chill out.

23- Here’s the Brony who banged the pony…

Published: August 6, 2018

What We Said: “I was expecting more of a stereotypical Brony with ribbons and cute little bows in his hair, not some guy who looks like he has a rewards card to both Bass Pro and Cabela’s. At the very least, you’d think there would be a splattering of glittery golden spray paint residue over his goatee, kind of like that of the Golden Huffer.”

Why It Was Crazy: Man, I’m not even gonna touch this one with a stick.

22- Louis Fowler is Back from the Dead (Or How I Spent My Summer Vacation)

Published: August 9, 2018

What We Said: “You see, in the simplest terms, I had a hemorrhagic stroke. Well, it started out as a hemorrhagic stroke and then ballooned into my lungs deflating (for some reason) and my kidneys failing (for some reason) and other assorted bodily traumas, forcing the esteemed Doctors to place me in an ethereal realm between medicated sleep and forced coma as I made a permanent home in the Intensive Care Unit. Don’t ask me about that month or so, though, because I have absolutely no memory of that period of knock, knock, knocking on Heaven’s door.”

Why It Was Crazy:
Anybody who’s ever met Louis Fowler know’s he’s a force of nature, and his spirit is not to be reckoned with. We’re all very fortunate that he survived this scrape, and I look forward to reading each and every one of his restaurant reviews that are more honest, funny, and artfully written than any other food writer in Oklahoma.

21- GOP Gubernatorial Runoff Is Finally Getting Dirty

Published: August 13, 2018

What We Said: “Although I would have gone the Gentner Drummond route and came out with guns blazing – twisting half-truths into outlandish claims that Kevin Stitt personally evicted old widows, juxtaposed with a video of a younger, happier Mick interviewing old ladies at the Sooner State Games for the 5 Alive sports beat from 1992 – that’s a solid start.”

Why It Was Crazy: It took awhile for the mudslinging to start in this race, probably once the candidates realized that they actually agreed with each other on just about everything. Still, by modern standards it was very tame. Mick called out Stitt for running a shady business, then Stitt bounced back with the fact that Mick is not a Trump supporter, which would be hilarious if it didn’t seem to have worked.