Walter White gets stuck on Turner Turnpike…

On September 29, 2013, AMC aired the final episode of their hit cash-cow, Breaking Bad. Audiences thought they had seen the last of Walter White, a.k.a Heisenberg, lying on the floor garage floor in the desert.; however, we always knew Walt was craftier than the rest.

Spoiler alert for the few snobbish ultra-nerds who never jumped on the hype train of Breaking Bad.

Much like Matt Damon, the infamous cook also made an appearance in the red dirt state. This one, however, was one to be remembered.


A recreational vehicle caught fire Saturday while at a tollbooth on Interstate 44 near Stroud, according to an official with the Oklahoma Highway Patrol.

Everyone in the RV got out of the vehicle, which was at a tollbooth in the westbound lanes of I-44. No injuries have been reported, said Sarah Stewart, with the Highway Patrol.

First off, hello Mr. White. I’m a huge fan. Not of your product, mind you. I always hated the way it smells.

But that’s right folks, Walter White isn’t dead but he’s close to it- he’s stranded in Stroud, Oklahoma; the land of the best god damn oatmeal pie and a casino that looks like a less-fun Piggly Wiggly.

There’s no telling as to why Heisenberg was passing through Oklahoma. One might wonder if he’s attempting to track down Jesse Pinkman for one more sweet, blue batch. And where better to cook it than in one of meth’s prime capitols?

The land of enchantment finally meets the red dirt lands. What could go wrong?

Here’s more:

As of 5:35 p.m., crews are working to put out the fire. The cause of the vehicle fire has not been released.

Cooking meth- there’s your answer, cops. I just did your job for you without using a badge or a gun. You’re welcome. I’ll receive my payment Hank Schrader home-brewed beer, Scraderbrau.

Joking aside, we are happy that no one was hurt in the fire. The sad part is that all that equipment is going to have be replaced somehow. I’d point Walter White in the direction of a school to pilfer from but, with the lack of school funding, he’s not likely to find much,.

Best of luck to you, Mr. White.

He’s not the one who knocks because it hurts his knuckles to knock to loudly. Find Brandon on Twitter @notshabbywriter and Instagram @brandonking1994.