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Steve Shaw is alive and well…

3:09 PM EDT on October 22, 2019

Back in August, Oklahoma's favorite TV news uncle-by-marriage – News 9 reporter Steve Shaw – mysteriously went missing from the Oklahoma City airwaves.

His absence was quickly noted by News 9 fans. They pinged The Lost Ogle tipline desperate for information about their favorite meat-eating, Scotch-drinking, DVD-collecting reporter. With hard-hitting interviews like the ones below, who could blame them?

Friendly reminder – that clip is from 2013. It was a nicer, simpler time, when a TV news reporter could ask a college student if she can handle five to eight inches and get lauded, not cancelled.

On the topic of five to eight inches, who could forget the time Steve shamed and scolded Colton Chronic and his mom – Beulah Blunt – for driving into a high water during a flash flood

Anyway, I enquired with News 9 about Steve's disappearance, and not surprisingly, was greeted with silence. Not too long after, his bio was removed from the News 9 website.

99% of the time that means the anchor / reporter is no longer with the station, but as Steve Shaw always says – "Never tell me the odds."

Sure, he could have been unceremoniously let go, living off cheap beer and bologna sandwiches, while  applying for jobs that he's not qualified for just to so he can continue to collect unemployment, but that didn't feel right. This is THE Steve Shaw. The man's a St. Louis honey badger! He could have just as easily gone deep undercover, investigating the secret underground world of massage parlors, CBD shops, and the women who love them, and his absence from the air – and News 9 website – could have been part of the ruse.

Not wanting to blow his cover, I held off on writing about his AWOL status. I figured Steve Shaw would turn up when he needed to turn up, perhaps even with a California tan, and everything would return to normal. But eventually days turned to weeks, and weeks into months, and well, then I forgot about it like I tend to do.

But last week, yet another Mole sent a desperate email asking about Steve. Determined to find out what exactly happened, and if there were any survivors, I logged into a burner account and went on a deep dive through social media.

After only a few minutes, I found this photo from September:

Yep, it appears Steve got married a few week's back to an employee with the Oklahoma County Sheriff's Department, one who just happens to be the aunt of my ex-maid who now lives in New Zealand. Well, at least that's what they want us to believe. If you're going undercover, go all out.

Although Steve's now happy and married (allegedly), we have sadly confirmed that his time on News 9 has officially come to end. I guess News 9 felt Steve was venturing too far into Meg Alexander territory, and Steve was mad the News 9 management wouldn't let him produce a five-part sweeps series on real-life Predator aliens that hunt the Oklahoma people, so they decided to go separate ways. That's a big loss for the Oklahoma people, but a big gain for people who like to drive in high water. Let's hope Steve gets a job as a car dealership pitchman or state agency spokesperson soon. We need him on our silver screens while they're still around.

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