8 Oklahoma grandma-approved sick day cures

With the leaves and temperatures dropping across the state, I think it’s safe to say that Oklahoma has finally achieved the status of “Fall.” Unfortunately, the lower temperatures of the Oklahoma fall season generally correspond with higher body temperatures in the average Oklahoman. Though everybody gets sick around this time of the year, there was once a time when taking a sick day was less of a PTO calculation and more of a mini-staycation complete with your own remote control and spot on your grandparents’ couch. Here are 8 Oklahoma grandma-approved remedies for a sick day.

Quality Entertainment

As a kid at grandma’s house, there was nothing quite like spending the hours between 9:00 AM and 3:00 PM binge watching basic cable television’s very own Jerry Springer, The Price Is Right, Judge Judy, and approximately 238 “Education Connection” commercials featuring the rapping waitress to pass time on a sick day. You’d be too zoned out on Benedryl and Bob Barker to notice your flu-like symptoms.

 

Medicine

So what if grandma’s Alka-Seltzer technically expired back in 1985? Grandpa technically died of a heart attack in 1982, but you don’t hear him bitching about expired medicine or his defibrillator scar.

Other “Medicine”

I don’t know how medicinal lemon-lime soda really is when you have the stomach flu, but my diabetic grandma gave me gallons of diet Shasta as a kid and I survived to adulthood, at least.

 

Food

Chicken noodle soup and grilled cheese made from Kraft American singles may not have healed you, but it at least contained a high enough sodium content to preserve your body until science discovered a cure for whatever ailed you.

 

Helpful “Cures”

Maybe it really does kill germs and sooth the throat, or maybe it’s nostalgia and my sweet tooth, but spoonful of honey mixed with lemon juice is still one of my go-to sore throat relievers.

 

Unorthodox “Cures”

My grandmother swore that putting a raw onion slice in your sock before bed would cure your sickness by morning. I don’t know how accurate that is, but I do know it at least stops the spreading of the sick germs because no one will come near your sweaty onion feet.

 

Prayer Chains

One time in middle school, I had an upper respiratory infection so severe my grandmother had put me on the prayer chain of 3 different denominations of churches before my cough finally went away.

 

Big Ass Crochet Blankets

Grandma made these herself when your mom was a kid. These big ass crochet blankets not only warmed even the most jarring chills, but the acrylic/cotton blend of the TG&Y yarn was perfect for wicking the sweat of broken fevers and soaking up chicken noodle soup and other mysterious fluids for generations.

Thank you, Grandma Bea. Follow Hayley on twitter @squirrellygeek