There’s a sigh of relief that comes with the end of a year like 2019, and the nail-biting anxiety that comes with staring down the cold barrel of 2020, which is going to be a political nightmare.

But before we face the ensuing mudfight for American power, let’s take a breather and look back at the top stories from your favorite and most trusted obscure local social blog, The Lost Ogle. Over the next several days, we’ll be digging through the archives for each month and remembering some of our funniest, craziest, and most popular articles.

Let’s begin with January…

Steve Lackmeyer is mad at the OKC Streetcar…

Published: January 2, 2019

What We Said:Steve should take some personal responsibility and admit that depending on a brand-new, glitchy streetcar that’s only been in operation a few weeks to maneuver you around the cold streets of Oklahoma City on the busiest night of the year isn’t the best idea. That’s as smart as a college kid getting into the newspaper business! If you’re freezing your ass off for 30 minutes waiting for a crowded train to take you three blocks down the street, that’s on you.

What We Learned: We already knew that Steve Lackmeyer is a curmudgeon. But he does have a point, that the crazy expensive choo-choo’s we bought came with some problems. Also, the Photoshop of Steve wearing a beret is one of Patrick’s most genius creations IMO.

Kevin Stitt Inauguration Recap…

Published: January 15, 2019

What We Said: Although Stitt is an alleged Oklahoma GOP outsider, the event felt like your standard Oklahoma GOP affair. It featured a bunch of white people speaking, a bunch of white people praying, and a bunch of white people celebrating that, despite eight years of Mary Fallin, they still get to run the state. In fact, I think the official theme of the event was “It’s good to be white!”

What We Learned: January was an incredible month for wealthy elite Republicans to party down. Also, Kevin Stitt used ‘mustard seeds’ as some kind of metaphor that nobody else understands.

Lifestyles of the Rich and Shameless: Key Auto Group Couple Involved in Multi-Million Dollar Divorce

Published: January 17, 2019

What We Said: Kendal filed a motion to modify the mediation agreement. She claimed David cut her off from her financial resources, and as a result, she was broke! In fact, things were so bad that she had to fire her domestic helpers, house manager and even the chef!

What We Learned:  It turns out being absurdly wealthy used-car dealers isn’t enough to buy a healthy relationship.

The Best Photos from the 2019 Speaker’s Ball…

Published: January 29, 2019

What We Said: Although it’s an “exciting tradition,” The Speaker’s Ball isn’t heavily promoted to the public or media. For some reason, I guess the establishment isn’t too eager to put the spotlight on politicians and lobbyists dressed in prom attire and mingling in line at the cash bar.

Fortunately, we were able to gain access to a password-protected photo gallery from the event, via the Ogle Mole Network. It contains a motherload of funny, easy-to-mock photos of unphotogenic white church folk, wearing ill-fitting dresses and tuxedos.

What We Learned:  Some people don’t dress up very well.

7 Step Guide to Buying Medical Marijuana in Oklahoma

Published: January 8, 2019

What We Said: Now that medical marijuana has been legal (and available for purchase) in Oklahoma for a few months, I’ve received a bunch of questions from friends, family members, and Mary Fallin about the topic. Yep, being a medical marijuana card holder has made me quite popular.

For the most part, the questions range from basic stuff like “How to get a medical license?” or “What type of THC product should I buy?” to the strange and specific like “Will Josh Sallee return my text messages now?” or “Which Little Debbie snack cake is the best for munchies?”

The answer to the last one is Star Crunch.

What We Learned: There was a lot to navigate with our new marijuana laws, but I think even the spaciest stoners with nicknames like ‘Roach’ have most likely gotten it all figured out by now.

For more of 2019, click here.

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3 Responses

  1. White people dominating at the inauguration gala? Au contraire!

    You forgot that the Main Man is a certified Native American. So Native, in fact, that people have taken to calling him Sequoyah (because he’s so tall). Why should Elizabeth Warren get all the attention with her unwanted nickname?

    This doesn’t help to explain Stitt’s odd war on Tribal casinos, but politics makes strange bedfellows.. and divorcees.

  2. He labels everyone he disagrees with a white. BTW what’s your race and gender? Lucas

  3. I contacted the city and you can the response to me., Mr. Sexson.

    Ok I respect this response but for my friends who live in Tulsa and come to OKC for work they dont understand advance planning. We need switches on these tracks I live downtown and couldnt figure out advanced planning and I have been down here 2 years. None the less we are 125 million in and some switches would be nice as it is an hour loop if you dont know your way around downtown which is not easy by any means.

    Mr. Sexson,

    Thank you for your e-mail to the mayor. As Director of the Public Transportation and Parking Department, I am responding on his behalf.

    I’m sure I can speak for the mayor by saying thank you for using the OKC Streetcar. You bring up a very interesting point regarding our system and the bidirectional movement you mention, or lack of, is a function of the system design. Streetcar systems are generally designed to be double tracked and serve a single corridor (or streets) or designed as a loop (couplet) system like OKC streetcar. Of course, some systems have both.

    With OKC streetcar being the loop system that it is, it provides great connectivity throughout most of downtown. With a bit of advanced trip planning and a quick review of the route map, a couplet system can be very efficient.

    For example, if you take the streetcar to a restaurant at the Automobile Alley stop and plan to return to the Central Business District or Bricktown after you dine, the most efficient way to use the system is to take the 2 minute walk one block west of Broadway to Robinson and catch the south bound Robinson streetcar at the Law School stop. This saves you from having to ride the streetcar all through Midtown before turning back south.

    Another example….. if you finished a trip at the Library and you decide to go to Bricktown, instead of boarding the streetcar at the Library stop and riding all the way around the loop, a 2 or 3 minute walk to either the Business District stop at Park and Robinson or the Century Center stop near Robinson and Sheridan will put you on a streetcar going directly to Bricktown.

    I hope this helps and please let us know if we can assist with any additional trip planning so your experience using the OKC Streetcar is quick and convenient.

    Thank you.

    Jason Ferbrache

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