2019 Rewind: April

Welcome back to our retrospective of another year in Oklahoma, as told through the lens of your favorite local obscure social blog, The Lost Ogle! Before we jump into the futuristic and dystopian year that 2020 will most assuredly turn out to be, let’s take a deep breathe and remember our funniest, wildest, and most popular stories of this year. The news cycle is moving so fast that it’s impossible to remember what happened last week, let alone last month.

Let’s get to it!

Oklahoma man nears settlement with county jail over 4-day erection…

Published: April 23, 2019

What We Said: I’ve never been to jail, so I don’t know what the customs are, but I’d probably pass on taking a little blue pill offered to me by another inmate, especially on my first night. I’d save it for a special occasion. Then again, this is Pittsburg County we’re talking about. Their sheriff was named the Third Hottest Sheriff in Oklahoma during our 2018 rankings.

What We Learned: Things can be, err, hard when you’re in the clink, but don’t take candy from strangers.

Oklahoma Turnpike Authority is messing with Midway…

Published: April 22, 2019

What We Said: I rarely, if ever, make a stop while driving to to Tulsa, but I always loved navigating the Midway area. The curve on the southbound side is always fun – especially if some trucker is trying to merge from the left – and the cruise control-altering slow down always keeps the two-hour drive from Tulsa to OKC interesting.

What We Learned: Yesterday, my partner and I stopped off at the Midway spot and lamented how weird it is that they’re making this change, but if anyone is gonna screw things up, it’s gonna be ODOT.

Mike Morgan calls out Damon Lane for premature tornado declaration…

Published: April 8, 2019

What We Said: Spotting the first tornado of severe weather season is a bit like scoring the first touchdown of football season – it’s inconsequential and doesn’t really matter in the whole scheme of things, but it’s cool nonetheless. At the very least, it’s a fun thing to experience. It also gives the Channel 5 promotions department something to mention for those 15-second weather promo spots they air during May sweeps.

What We Learned: 2019 was the Year of the Weatherperson Beef, and if it was any indication, we’re going to see some wild fights next year. Stay with TLO, we’ll keep you advised.

Paul Scott forced to apologize to Senate for playing childish prank on Carri Hicks…

Published: April 11, 2019

What We Said: Not to be Captain Obvious, but it must really suck to be a woman working at the capitol. Not only do you have to deal with sexual harassment and all that stuff, but now you have to worry about lawmakers putting a whoopie cushion in your seat or gum in your hair.

What We Learned: It’s pretty cool when the people we elect to represent our state to the country have the maturity level of a 6th grader with a substitute teacher.

Breaking News – Regular Jim Traber is still a thin-skinned punk

Published: April 16, 2019

What We Said: We all know Regular Jim Traber is the ultimate hypocrite and a spineless amoeba crybaby, but that takes things to a whole new level. You’d think a guy who failed so miserably at major league baseball, and has been routinely poked, prodded and heckled throughout his life, would have thicker skin by now, and not take out his anger and aggression on the messenger like it was a billy-goat crossing a bridge.

What We Learned: We didn’t learn anything new about Jim Traber, but the moral of the story is to never count Tiger Woods out.