Welcome back to our retrospective of another year in Oklahoma, as told through the lens of your favorite local obscure social blog, The Lost Ogle! Before we jump into the futuristic and dystopian year that 2020 will most assuredly turn out to be, let’s take a deep breathe and remember our funniest, wildest, and most popular stories of this year. The news cycle is moving so fast that it’s impossible to remember what happened last week, let alone last month.
Let’s get to it!
Published: August 8, 2019
What We Said: Snoop is one of my favorite rappers, and Thad Balkman – a former Oklahoma lawmaker – is one of the favorite judges of the Oklahoma ruling class. Not only is he doing everything possible to make sure the state wins a record settlement in its signed, sealed and delivered trial against Johnson & Johnson, but he also helped OU block release of the Joe Mixon sucker punch video for as long as legally possible. Basically, he has a long and luxurious career ahead of him.
What We Learned: Well, at least he wasn’t wearing blackface…
Published: August 29, 2019
What We Said: I was in our studio cleaning up my taco mess, oblivious to the carnage that awaited, when the first tornado alerts started going off on my phone. Because we’re in freaking August, I first assumed it was a flash flood warning or Silver Alert or some other iPhone emergency message that you usually ignore. When I saw the tornado on the phone, I was in disbelief. “Weather like this usually waits until the fair is in town,” I thought. “Why is it here so early?!”
What We Learned: The curse of Oklahoma is that every third year we have a brand new meteorological phenomenon. What will the next one be? Volcanic wind? Typhoon sinkholes? Stay with TLO, we’ll keep you advised.
Published: August 12, 2019
What We Said: Nowadays, it’s easy to eat at a new local restaurant every single week. If you follow any local food bloggers, influencers, are our social media addicted mayor, your feed is no doubt clogged with the hottest and hippest new spots. But even with a growing population and younger diners who want to see and be seen at soft openings, we gotta wonder how large this bubble is going to get.
What We Learned: Despite all of the growth OKC is seeing and all the fancy new high-rises popping up like hard nips on a winters day, the service industry may start to stall in the future.
Driving down the extremely dangerous OKC Boulevard! Don’t try this at home! https://t.co/pEZD9VyHP8
— The Lost Ogle (@TheLostOgle) August 20, 2019
Published: August 21, 2019
What We Said: We can wait eight years to finish construction on the damn road, but not another month or so to install traffic and pedestrian lights? That would be like moving into your new Ideal Home before they finished installing the crown molding and fixtures.
What We Learned: Even with nearly a decade of planning and construction, Oklahoma will bungle every road construction project that comes our way, stoplights be damned.
Published: August 23, 2019
What We Said: Yeah, I can say that’s probably a good reason to apologize, especially if you want to have a career in TV news. Then again, knowing what we know about some Oklahomans, I bet a lot of people thought it was funny.
What We Learned: Institutionalized racism and white privilege is so rampant that even people on sanitized local news shows still let things like this slip, like comparing a black co-worker to an ape. Think before you speak, people.