Lost Ogle Faces Existential Crisis! Launches Membership Program To Survive!

Hello Internet person who comes to this website to read what we write!

Like all of our partners in the OKC food, arts, entertainment and retail scenes, the Coronavirus pandemic has hit The Lost Ogle hard. Although web traffic has increased as we all succumb to Corona-mania, 85% of our advertising and event revenue has evaporated in less than a week due to the economic collapse, providing an immediate, existential threat to this website.

As a result, we’re going to pull the tarp on something we planned to launch in May to coincide with our 13th birthday: The Ogle Mole Membership Club. It’s a monthly membership program for our readers, fans and enemies who want to financially support our very unique, difficult-to-define brand of satire, tabloid news, political coverage, snarkrage, food reviews, media criticism, political incorrectness and occasional humor.

The Ogle Mole Club has three different monthly membership levels:

To be clear, you can still view our content and articles for free. This is just something for those kind souls who want to support what we do, even when it sucks!

Q: “That’s cool, but what do I get from a membership outside of the occasional enjoyment of reading this website?”

A: “How about a FREE Gift!”

Sign up for a membership today and we’ll send you…

$5 Junior Ogle: “Collectible” Lost Ogle Ink Pen.* Yes, that’s right – a collectible Lost Ogle ink pen, the very same shiny and cheap black and white model that we’re currently not using at any of our cancelled trivia events!

$9.99 Ogle Mole: “Collectible” Lost Ogle Ink Pen + Limited-Edition Koozie.* Your heroic membership will earn you a pen and a “limited-edition” Lost Ogle koozie. Down the road, we’ll also send you an Ogle Mole Membership Club card that you can use for free stuff and discounts at local businesses!

$19.99 Oil Overlord: “Collectible” Lost Ogle Ink Pen + Limited-Edition Koozie + Ownership of Patrick’s Soul.* Hi, Mr. Hamm. I know you and your buddies read this. For signing up, we’ll send you a pen, koozie and hand-signed letter acknowledging ownership of a small, minute portion of my soul. And no, I’m not making that up!

*Please allow 4 -6 weeks for delivery.

“Cool, what else do I get?”

Once again, this is something that we had planned to launch later in the year. At the moment, the only added benefit of a membership is the gratification that comes from supporting local media, owning a piece of my soul and keeping us afloat during a rough patch when we really need to be afloat.

You can sign up below or by clicking here. All the payment stuff is securely handled through Stripe. We’ll send your gift to the billing address. We also promise not to sell your data and other stuff to anyone but Emily Sutton:

Looking to make a one-time contribution, click here.

Anyway, if you’re still reading this, we’d still like to thank you for supporting and reading our site over the hopefully years. We also want to thank all of the local businesses that have supported us, and turned this operation into a sustainable OKC  institution. Once again, they’re going through a tough time, too. We can’t wait to work with them again when things return to normal.

Thanks for sticking with The Lost Ogle. We’ll keep you advised.

Patrick is the proprietor and publisher of The Lost Ogle.

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Help keep The Lost Ogle in business. Join the TLO Membership Club today for only $5 a month!

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17 Responses

  1. Can donations be targeted for Louis Fowler’s work, given the banality & predictability of everything else on here?

  2. Just a casual observation. It would appear, Chris, that soon as the Republican leadership, both at the State and Federal level quit doing things that are literally so incredibly stupid that most of us struggle with the question of if we should be laughing or crying.
    I’m thinking as long as we have idiots such as stitt or donald at the top of the pile and have to deal with this type person, we might as well be laughing as crying.
    Banality and predictability will go away for you just as soon as the Republican party changes its repetitive, idiotic and damaging ways.
    I could also ask, Chris, if you take seriously donald and his crew of cons? Trump U.? I’ll take laughing at the joke that the Republican party is rather than crying about what they’re doing to the Nation in the name of stopping change.

    1. The GOP has quit doing incredibly stupid stuff?

      I don’t think so.

    2. Federal and State Republican leadership has stopped doing stupid things?

    3. Whole lot of assumption, KC, in your rambling post, but you clearly needed to trot a strawman out. Great work, KC. Maybe you’ll get a free Lost Ogle pen!

  3. Bring back hot girl Friday and the state fair photo competition and I’ll consider……

  4. Wait a minute! This is a scam isn’t it. I know for a fact Patrick has already sold his soul. Lucifer wasn’t interested but Carol Hefner picked it up for twelve fifty and the first rights to the aluminum cans littering the Hefner Speedway. I saw her yesterday. She had Patrick’s soul dangling from her charm(less?) bracelet. Somehow I thought it would be bigger.

    1. I thought atheists didn’t believe in a soul…
      So if he’s selling parts of his soul, then indeed this is a scam.

  5. Mike Morgan’s good for 20.

  6. Could there be a couple of one-time options between $25 and $100 or must lazy scuts so inclined endure the agony of making multiple on-time contributions? LOL

    1. You could send a one-time to paypal.me/thelostoglepaypal.me/thelostogle if you want to pick an amount.

  7. promise more listicles and I’ll consider

  8. FEWER listicles and I’LL consider.

  9. Where is graychin lately? The dude is literally wrong in everything he says (and he says a shit-Ton) but he’s always good for entertainment.
    I actually suspected he’s Patrick generating agreeable commentary.
    Hope the old dude is ok….

    1. I’m back. Nice to know that you missed me.

      1. Glad to know you’re ok man

  10. I’ll be in as soon as I get my stimulus check, JK, but a couple of suggestions/requests:
    I agree with the state fair photo contest, hot girl friday-also ability to edit comments so we can correct our fat finger mistakes. Also —–nudity—–nudity is the internet’s bacon, just like bacon makes almost (and by almost I really mean always) everything better, a little nudity here would help, especially if it’s local celebs. Tell who wouldn’t get a kick out of some scantily clad pics of Marla Morgan, or Mike Morgan. LOL

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